The Myrmidon (WIP) (Minor update 03/10/2017)

science-fantasy
gender-choice

#2166

Well the basilisk is one of 3 things a giant snake a huge lizard or the small cockatrice snake thing that piny refers to

However all 3 versions have one universal gift the ability to kill with a glance/gaze (much like the medusa)
However the lizard breaths fire as well and the giant snake can crush stone and spit powerful venom at great distances.

The one you mentioned can fly deliver venom through bite
The Weasle weakness refers to a mongooses ability to kill a cobra thus a weasle is immune to its gaze and venom

This is the one you mentioned
IMG_1466

I prefer the giant snake or huge lizard for this story
The cockatrice snake is silly.
Edit: the other two are why they are frightening to me


#2167

I’m so glad this this is active again. I can’t wait to see what awaits my MC and our little band of misfits.


#2168

No I’m aware of what a basilisk is, I was being facetious because it seemed like an odd comparison.

Are you saying you’d like me to add a basilisk to this story? Only all of the other animals are made up, so it would be a bit odd to say the least.

Glad to be back, and thanks for reading.


#2169

loved the new update, masterful work as always :grinning:. Surprised the combat Myrmidon would need help standing after the fight with the king Toise I suppose they don’t come with quick recovery


#2170

That’s the notion I wanted to convey. Basically your entire body was pushed into a high stress situation mere minutes after being formed. Your internals were probably still cooling and settling when you leapt face-first into the King Toise’s mouth. Your body needs time to recover.

Once you’re more adept at using your abilities they’ll be easier to manage and recover from, but there wasn’t the time in that fight for nuance or thoughtful energy usage.


#2171

No not asking, It would indeed be odd. Just thought the abilities of many creatures like the basilisk would be useful
Things to look at for future creatures.
Was just trying to give ideas, though the comparison to “Hypno kitty” as I dub it is similar and I thought it was funny especially since you know The Hypno Toad.

I do like the king tortoise and its vulnerability.
All in all the story is awesome.
Edit: my phone keeps editing the creatures name to tortoise.


#2172

Thank you for your input, I’ll be sure to bear it in mind. If you’re curious about the wildlife of this game, there’s actually a bestiary in the codex, which can be found at the bottom of the stats page. Might be worth a look if you’re wondering what kind of things you might run into over the course of the story.


#2173

I…did not see that, after reading it I’m hungry.


#2174

Actually I think this actually marks the first time someone has responded to my stories with hunger. Not sure what to make of that, but marking it down somewhere regardless.


#2175

I am a particularly odd individual, still cool to know that caught you possibly off guard.


#2176

The same reason why the Thinker Myrmidon now has the mother of all headaches, eh?

All Myrmidons need help standing and it’ll probably take a couple of before we’re in complete control. Remember the fumbling and failing with simple buttons on the Rebel Path?
Of course on the Rebel path we can stand at least but then on the rebel path we don’t almost critically overtax ourselves at the very beginning, though that Toise fight is the most epic of openings…which fits the grandeur of the noble path I suppose.

Of course that particular problem would be less obvious on the noble path as we probably get attendants to help us dress, which is annoying in a rather different way.
In any case we should be in control of those function within the week…probably. Maybe the combat Myrmidon recovers fine motor control slightly faster then the others…which would mean the thinker…poor Lord Flash, eh? :sweat_smile:


#2177

After reading this once I am also hungry but I think that’s more because I missed dinner. This was really good… Like, damn… It’s hard for me to really put it into words, but the writing just felt really… smooth… Like, I just didn’t notice anything to complain about… and as a serial nitpicker that does actually mean something. The world and characters are interesting and even sympathetic, even though the path I took seems to imply that the majority of characters I’m interacting with are secretly evil. The world feels like it exists outside the context of this particular story without large amounts of nonsensical exposition.

I have only played through it once of course so I can only speak for the choices I personally picked. I guess if I had one complaint it’d be that it really doesn’t make much sense to me that the main character would choose not to stay with “mother.” Sure the player knows she’s not actually the constantly kind and gentle person she seems to be, but the MC doesn’t. All he has is some vague feelings that she isn’t necessarily telling them everything she could be, the promises of some random stranger, and the strangely familiar behavior of some other even more random stranger, both of whom apparently attacked the home of their adoptive mother. who’s been nothing but kind of supportive.


#2178

Why’s everyone getting hungry reading this?

Is it the toise? The overexertion fighting said toise? The anticipation of sampling upper class dining? The way @Moreau writes?

I mean I just ate breakfast but now I wonder if this is some subliminal message…


#2179

All of the above:

“To receive a toise soup you must first chop a hard boiled egg very fine in the bottom of your plate. Then you squeeze into the egg the juice of half a lemon, and pour into it, also, a teaspoon full of mellow old Otard brandy from a bottle, which furnishes you a drink at the same time. The egg is to prepare the plate, and the drink is to prepare the stomach.

Then your plate is filled with soup, and while the egg struggles from the bottom to float on the surface, you lay aside all earthly thoughts, forgive all your enemies, and forget all your creditors and put a teaspoon full of it into your mouth. Then you remove the spoon and shut your eyes, and your soul, on the wings of sensuous thought, passes outward into lotus land, and for a time you are lost in a dream that is so still, so perfect, and so all absorbing that you wish, lazily and sadly, it might never end.

But you swallow the soup and open your eyes, discover that the face of nature is unchanged, and then, your intellect having reasserted its sway, you conclude that the toise, like the swan, yields its only perfect symphony in its death.”

I was writing that addition to the codex last night, and apparently it was not a moment too soon…

Exactly, your mental processing speed was increased to such an extent that the world started to slow down around you. Not something you can just switch on and off.

The noble path as yet has the most traumatic introduction, so yes your body has expended a great deal of energy in a short space of time, and now there is a bill to collect. By the morning most of the damage will be repaired and the only proof you’ll have of your hardship is a powerful need for breakfast.

You will be assigned a personal chambermaid, who frankly you can order to bugger off at your own leisure.

Gawrsh…

That’s certainly something I take very seriously. The notion that a created world must exist outside of the story you wish to tell in it is vital in my opinion. Others might disagree and state that everything you place into a story must serve some purpose, like a rifle placed on the stage in act one that must be fired by the end of act two.

I believe that a world has to function on at least some level long before you determine the story that takes place inside it.

Nevertheless I’m very appreciative of the compliment.

I worked very hard to give a veneer of love and respectability to Lady Calinas, because originally the problem was that I couldn’t imagine any scenario where the MC would stay with her.

Essentially the three paths boil down to a single moment where you decide what motivates your character the most.

Lady Calinas gives you an order. Come to me and you’ll be safe, cared for and wealthy beyond your wildest dreams.

Arinthas demands that you follow him because you have a purpose far and above the petty squabbles around you, and offers answers to any questions you might imagine about the world and your place in it.

Radjack doesn’t have any orders or demands whatsoever. He offers you a hand freely. The only thing he can offer is love, for your past self and possibly your contemporary self.


#2180

That makes sense, My issue is that I felt like Calinas was the only one the MC had any reason to trust. Wealth wasn’t really a factor in the decision process. It was just, here’s this woman who I am clearly drawn to desperately begging that I do as she says versus two strangers offering vague promises. Maybe it’d work better with the super brain powers because you’d be able to over-analyse all the pros and cons of these choices, but with the other two it feels like there’s significantly less reason to pick the other choices.


#2181

Well my mc’s super brain powers are drawn to mr. Gray. :blush:

Indeed, she’s quite the damsel in distress and that is powerful moment, though you’re right the thinker Myrmidon would be able to make a better assessment then the others, but then the way I see it the “noble” path is not an entirely unselfish one, even if you do mean well. Though the vulnerability of Lady Calinas may appeal the heroic or chivalrous too.


#2182

Funnily enough the Rebels have consistently scored quite highly with readers, and its difficult to determine whether that is due to their portrayal in the story or what people already know about them from the thread and so on.

I do believe that there are a couple of times when Lady Calinas’ mask slips if you choose the right things. There’s a point where one of your earlier choices is essentially to ask ‘I wonder what they’re going to do to me’ and you see a conversation between her and Malleus Finn in which some of the evil beneath the surface breaks through.

I suppose at its heart, the key thing for this scene is to imagine the contextual evidence presented to the MC rather than the reader. Would you trust this situation even in your naive state? Or would you read the Lady’s offer as too good to be true and her manners too perfect to be emotionally genuine.

Hmm… Maybe I’ll revisit the scene later.


#2183

Or with the thinker’s brainpower you might think you see and advantage for yourself there too. After all wealth is the great enabler that makes almost anything you might want to do a lot easier. As I said I think the noble path is not meant to be an entirely unselfish one, no matter how noble ones intentions. :thinking:

True, the rebs are adorably adorkable, but then again so is “Lord” Flash or really all incarnations of Flash the way I envision him. In contrast to the noble path the rebel one is likely a self-sacrificing one.

The mage path of course offers one thing I always find hard to stay away from in real life too, knowledge, even if in hindsight I’d probably have been better off without some of the knowledge I’ve gained over the years. I suspect mage Flash is very likely to have similar ruminations later on, but then knowledge in a way is the only thing possibly more addictive then wealth and power to me, particularly since the right kind of knowledge can be translated into the former pretty easily.
So in that regard real life me could probably stand to do a bit better, as I’m far from being a Shadow Broker just yet. :sweat_smile:


#2184

I totally get that Calinas is faking her “loving mother with probably some oedipal undertones if we’re being completely honest here come on” thing. I as a reader see that, but in deciding what choice to make I think about what the character themselves would choose given the information they personally have. And they don’t remember anything before waking up confused and alone and being comforted by this kind and beautiful woman. You need experience to be cynical.


#2185

Loved the update!!

I have to admit that I’m falling in love with Mr. Gray when Radjack used to be my number 1 boy.

I enjoyed the litte part when you ask Gray for assistance exiting the carriage and he lifts an eyebrow in annoyance. Could you explain why he was annoyed/irritated?

ALSO, what would romancing Gray be like? How is he when it comes to showing affection or is he super cool on the surface 24/7? What would it take to make him crack?