Spellbound: A Ghost Story (WIP) [Updated May 22, 2024]

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Just popping in before the thread auto-closes because I recently muscled through a thick mire of writer’s block and thus hold a faint glimmer of hope that I might be able to update this sometime, someway, in the vaguely foreseeable future.

…Perhaps not so vague, I suppose, since this post effectively buys me an extension of exactly two more months before the system decides one way or another whether I deserve its grace. Time, as ever, is an unforgiving mistress—and, incidentally, an unforgetting one.

Let’s hope I don’t take quite that long! But as always, no promises.

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Dang, I love this one a lot. Also played the whole demo in one go. Also, I absolutely hate Callum, and I love it! That means he’s well written because I rarely really hate characters even though they test my patience lol.

I’d say I also can’t wait for an update, but you take your time, dear author :+1:

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I recently had a very sudden death in the family.

I wasn’t as close to the deceased—my aunt—as many of my relatives, but she was a significant and well-loved presence in the family in general, and dealing with the aftermath of her passing will be an involved and probably time-consuming process.

I don’t know yet if this will majorly impact my writing process and if so, to what extent. It’s possible I will still update in the coming month as originally planned, or it’s possible I’ll go dark for another few months. I really can’t say right now, but consider this a heads up in case it turns out to be the latter.

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I’m sorry for your loss. Death is always a shock. Take your time.

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Today is Thanksgiving

…In the United States, which, as we all know, is the only country that matters.

But today is a day we all can take joy in, around the world, for it is a day of comfort and harmony, of love and togetherness—values we all share. It is a day we give thanks to the universe for the bountiful harvest of fall, and ignore the looming death promised by winter.

It is today that we celebrate the unifying spirit of our nation’s history, as we look back and remember the day the earliest pilgrmis dined with the native peoples of this land. Thus, this is a day of differences put aside and camaraderie found in unexpected places—just as the MC has found unusual companions in Callum and Charlotte, bonds that surely will never break.

I’ve heard that there are some other historical details about the relationship between colonists and native tribes that I’m omitting here, but I’m sure they’re not important to the point I’m making.

Today is also a day for family! It is a day we refresh our familial bonds, come together as one, and remind ourselves that together, we are stronger. Just as Charlotte has found solace and safety in her beloved uncle’s arms, so too do we find comfort in our own families, where one never has to fear of division, hostility, or betrayal. This is, of course, the ideal that Thanksgiving so richly embodies, as anybody who celebrates it will tell you.

Finally, today is a day of gratitude. It is a day we look out to the world, and give thanks (hence the name!) out to the universe for all the grace we’ve been shown—just as our beloved protagonist must naturally feel thankful for all the myriad good things that have been happening to them recently, and all the happy memories yet to come.

And of course—what better animal to represent these themes than the turkey? A large bird, to represent contentment; a flightless bird, to represent groundedness; a bird who travels in flocks, to represent the feeling of togetherness. Truly, a majestic creature.

And, just like Charlotte, one destined to be hunted, slaughtered, and forgotten by history.

Happy Thanksgiving

Today’s update is ~38,500 words long, which brings the total wordcount to ~293,500 words. In this update, we conclude the second flashback chapter, finally resolving the seven and a half month long cliffhanger from the last update!

As a reminder, when discussing the events of this update, please remember to use spoiler tags for the foreseeable future (we’ll say a week or so), for the people who can’t play it right away.

Next update will see a return to the present day in Chapter III, where we’ll finally meet another RO, Kira Watanabe, an antisocial witch with a razor-sharp wit—as well as her imp familiar, Qolvar, who I’m excited to announce is the secret RO you’ve all been waiting for!

Not sure how long it will take for this update to come—I’m hoping less than this one did (maybe January?), but no promises.

Finally—as you might have seen above, I recently had a significant death in the family (the irony of posting this on the family holiday of the year is not lost on me), which has left us with a lot of family matters and tribulations to deal with, including—for some of us—having to find a new place to live.

With that in mind, I don’t usually do this, but if you like this update and have a few bucks to spare, please consider offering a tip at my ko-fi. Obviously, this won’t be enough to cover the moving expenses all on its own[citation needed], but every little bit would help.

Thanks!

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Its finally updated!! So excited to play it again. Too bad my saves vanished :smiling_face_with_tear:

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I’ve not reached the new content yet, I decided to replay from the beginning, but there’s a bug with this scene:

Callum runs a hand through his damp hair, tousling it just enough to look both scrappy and elegant—just the way he likes it.

“So,” he continues, “what’d dear old Uncle Townsend want from you? Or is it a secret?”

My MC picked the last choice when talking with the uncle - “Oh, really? Tell me more about ‘people like me’, milord.”

But the game acts like she told him Charlotte was not ok.

Also, thank you for the update, this is one of my favourite wips :slight_smile:

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Prefacing this question by acknowledging that as a nerd whose into stuff like historical warfare, this is probably something that’s way more noticable to me than a lot of other people, but what’s the scale of the battle at the beginning supposed to be? Cause the way it’s described (or at least how the knight version is), it seems like it’s a pretty big battle, but if that’s the case, there are certain elements especially Callum’s betrayal plan that don’t make a ton of sense.
It wasn’t too egregious to be clear, especially since it could easily be reworked, and I do really enjoy the story so far, but it was just very noticeable to me at least.

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Hey, so I looked through this section and consulted my testers, and unfortunately, none of us could identify an issue with the code that could produce the result you’re describing, so I’m honestly a bit puzzled by this.

Do you mind being more specific about exactly what text you’re seeing here?

As someone who knows very little about historical warfare, my honest answer is “as big or small as it needs to be for the average reader to be able to suspend their disbelief”, which…I suppose might seem like a copout.

I guess the way I would put it is that it’s canonically a battle that’s huge in the sense that it matters. It’s tactically crucial in terms of the overall war effort, and winning or losing the battle is what shifts the tide in terms of the MC’s side being able to ultimately win or lose the war as a whole.

But as for the scale physically, in terms of headcount and geography? I really have no sense of that, which is sort of why I tried to leave it vague.

I’m certainly open to suggestions on how it could be made more believable, especially if the fix is easy! But to be clear, this is also very definitely a fantasy story and not intended to be historically realistic in any practical sense—the narrative impact will always take priority for me, I think.

Still, if there’s a way to accomplish both, that would of course be ideal, so I appreciate the feedback, and if you have ideas on that front, go ahead and let me know. Like I said, this is something I’m pretty ignorant about.

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Of course the only female RO I’m interested is only romanceable by women only, just my luck.

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So the code says if you pick this one like I did, you should get harold respect:

#“Oh, really? Tell me more about ‘people like me’, milord.”
*set harold_respect true
*set harsh %+5
*set passionate %+5

And then we have

#“He asked me about Charlotte—how she was really doing.”

"...Oh yeah? Weird that he asked you. Not like you two are exactly close."

"That's what I told him. He said that's [i]why[/i] he asked, he thought I might've seen something you or Charlotte wouldn't notice, or wouldn't admit to."

"Huh. So...what'd you tell him?"

*if harold_confide
  *set callum_respect %-10

  "The truth. That Charlotte's been getting worse over the past year, even if she won't admit it."
  
  "...Hm." Callum's expression suddenly becomes thoughtful. "You think it was a good idea, telling him that?"
  
  "What do you mean?"
  
  "Eh...nothin', I guess. Guess I just feel like that's Char's business, not yours. Or his, even."
*elseif harold_respect 
  *set callum_respect %+8
  
  "That I didn't appreciate the way he painted commoners as a bunch of gossips just nosing our way into everyone else's business."
  
  "Ha! Damn, wish I coulda seen [i]that[/i]."

I got this text even though I didn’t tell Harold anything about Charlotte:
“The truth. That Charlotte’s been getting worse over the past year, even if she won’t admit it.”

  "...Hm." Callum's expression suddenly becomes thoughtful. "You think it was a good idea, telling him that?"
  
  "What do you mean?"
  
  "Eh...nothin', I guess. Guess I just feel like that's Char's business, not yours. Or his, even."

instead of

*elseif harold_respect
*set callum_respect %+8

  "That I didn't appreciate the way he painted commoners as a bunch of gossips just nosing our way into everyone else's business."
  
  "Ha! Damn, wish I coulda seen [i]that[/i]."

Edit: maybe it should be *elseif harold_respect true to work? I’m not a coder, so I’m just guessing here.

Edit 2:
Another one I found. After our
first kill picking the #I can’t help but feel a twisted sort of satisfaction.
*set firstkill “satisfied”

I got this text:

Callum falls silent.

“…Okay,” he finally says. “Okay, I guess I’m starting to see the appeal. But…still. You realize you’re gonna have to kill people if you’re a rebel, right, Kassandra? This isn’t some training camp, we’d basically be going to war.”

According to the code it should be the second one:

*if firstkill != “satisfaction”
You realize you’re gonna have to kill people if you’re a rebel, right, ${memname}? This isn’t some training camp, we’d basically be going to war."

You swallow. “I think…we’ll be in danger no matter where we go, Callum. Trying to avoid situations where I might have to kill isn’t realistic anymore.”
*else
The rebellion? We’d basically be signing ourselves to a life of crime. I mean, not that I have a problem with that, but are you sure about this?"

“For someone with ‘no problem with it’, you seem to be the only one complaining, Callum.”

“I’m just making sure we’re not rushing into something we’ll regret…again. But if you say so.”

I think you should change satisfaction to satisfied for it to work.

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Right, but the only way you could have gotten the text you did was if harold_confide got set to true somehow (this has nothing to do with the way the *elseif line is coded—the game never even evaluated that line, because it registered the original *if as true, apparently).

As far as I recall and can see from my end, there are only two choices that can set harold_confide to true, and both of them are mutually exclusive with the one you apparently picked. It shouldn’t be possible for both of them to be set to true at this point.

That’s why I can’t figure out what the problem is here.

Ordinarily, I’d chalk this up to the save system being weird and retaining old variable values when you load an old save, but…you did say this was a fresh playthrough, so unfortunately, I got nothing. Do you happen to still have a save from that section of the game, and if so, does the problem persist if you reload and try again?

This one is spot on and easily fixed, though! Thanks.

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Oh, so there are 2 choices to set harold_confide to true, maybe that’s the problem. I thought there’s only one. I don’t have a save there unfortunately, but I may clear the cookies and play again later and see if the result is the same.

Edit: @CorvusWitchcraft , sorry to bother you again, but I would like to understand. Setting aside the harold_confide - if I pick this choice with him:
“Oh, really? Tell me more about ‘people like me’, milord.”
then I’m getting this conversation with him:

Summary

Instead of rising to your bait, Harold laughs, sardonically. “Oho, you’re a feisty one, huh? I like that, really I do. And if I’ve offended you…well, that wasn’t my intention. All I meant to say was that a lot of nobles tend to underestimate people they see as lesser. They let their guards down, you know? I thought maybe, at some point, Charlotte had let her guard down around you.”

"So you're saying you think Charlotte sees me as lesser," you observe.

"...[i]Doesn't she?[/i]" 

Harold smiles, wryly, a keen glint in his eyes. "You don't have to respond to that, if you don't want to," he finally says. "Just thought I'd see what you had to say. But I can see I've overshot;

I suppose that’s all there is to say, for now. Go on and freshen up. I’ll have the chef prepare our food, in the meantime. I’m sure you must be hungry as well. Don’t take long, hm?"

Then what is the text that I should get with Callum?
Because I got this one, even though my conversation with Harold was nothing like the one described bellow:

“The truth. That Charlotte’s been getting worse over the past year, even if she won’t admit it.”

  "...Hm." Callum's expression suddenly becomes thoughtful. "You think it was a good idea, telling him that?"
  
  "What do you mean?"
  
  "Eh...nothin', I guess. Guess I just feel like that's Char's business, not yours. Or his, even."

That’s what I was trying to explain earlier. Sorry if it’s a bit unclear, but English is not my first language.

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So, here's how this is supposed to work:

There are two relevant variables here: harold_confide and harold_respect. Both are initialized to false on startup.

When you meet Harold, he asks you about how Charlotte’s doing. You have a bunch of options here, but there are three relevant ones:

  • “Honestly, I do think Charlotte was more affected by what happened than she lets on.”
  • “Well, Charlotte is even grumpier than she used to be, if that’s what you mean.”
  • “Oh, really? Tell me more about ‘people like me’, milord.”

The first two set harold_confide to true, because you’re answering Harold’s question about Charlotte.

The third one, the one you picked, sets harold_respect to true, because you answer in a way that Harold is surprised and intrigued by.

Later on, Callum asks you what you talked about with Harold. This gets answered via an if-elseif block, like so:

*if harold_confide
  [The scene that you got]
*elseif harold_respect
  [The scene you should have gotten]

As you can see, it shouldn’t be possible to get the first scene unless harold-confide is set to true, which as far as I can tell cannot happen unless you pick one of the first two options above. If you picked the third option I listed—the one you apparently did pick—harold_confide is supposed to stay false and harold_respect is set to true, which triggers the second conversation (which you were supposed to see, but didn’t).

Somehow, that’s not what happened, but I can’t see any coding reason why.

Addendum: for reference, the scene you should have gotten, under the harold_respect conditional, is this one:

“That I didn’t appreciate the way he painted commoners as a bunch of gossips just nosing our way into everyone else’s business.”

“Ha! Damn, wish I coulda seen that.”

TLDR: for you to have gotten the scene with Callum that you did, harold_confide must have gotten set to true somehow, but I can’t see how, because the only places that happens are within choices that you didn’t pick. I would suspect Dashingdon save system shenanigans, but if this was a fresh playthrough and not an old save, then that answer doesn’t make sense either.

So again, pretty baffled.

Open question, has anybody else gotten this error? Or do any code-divers in the thread see any mistakes in the code I’m missing?

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Thanks again for the detailed explanation. So it should be working just as I thought. I have no idea why it’s not showing the proper text to me, though.
Anyway, I’ll try to make a fresh start again when I have more time and I’ll let you know if the result is the same.

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This is… A wonderful demo. I haven’t even finished it yet and I’m very impressed so far. So much so that I’m commenting for the first time in a long while.

P.S. I love Charlotte and am scared for her :pensive:

Edit: I finished it 3 mins after posting this and now I’m very sad.

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Charlotte has really come around for me. Take all the time you need while working on this wonderful story.

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Thank you so much for writing this. Your story is so lovely. The premise, the switches between time periods, and the science of magic, it all fascinates me. I’m squirming at the edge of my seat, looking forward to the next update. (no matter if it takes 8 centuries or more)

The characters are well-written, and I hold every single one of them dear. Valerie reminds me of my younger sister, so I do hold a soft spot for her.

I have to say, though, I really do adore Callum. He’s my favourite out of all the cast, I respect him, in a way. He feels human. Flawed and admirable. In every playthrough, I’ve picked the option of a past fling with him (except the first, it was only halfway through did I begin to like him as much as I do now).

If I buy your word and he is indisputably dead, both body and soul, I really do hope to find mementos of him. More personal ones. Maybe an especially well-kept journal, with passages about how he perceived the player, what he thought of life, etc. Nothing could beat a reunion, though. My mc and him got along very well as they were quite similar in nature.

Again, I must thank you for your work. It was a wonderful read.

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So I cleared my cache and cookies, updated the browser, started again from the beginning and now everything is working fine and I’m getting the response I should. Sorry for the false alarm, apparently the problem was on my end.

I’m in the same boat here, hoping for some miracle that we meet him in the present. Or that we travel back in time. But if we can’t we’ll always have Cortez, right? :wink:

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Thoroughly enjoying this WIP. The pacing is fantastic, especially the way the past sequences tie into the present day plots. Also Callum slowly realizing his exes have unionized? Good shit. My gay ghost guy, past or present, is a woman supporter first, terrible taste in men second.

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