Hosted on Dashingdon:
This game has been my on-and-off creative writing outlet. I enjoy where it is going, and with summer break officially here I want to spend more time working on it. Even though the first chapter is not yet complete, I need your help finding flaws in my current writing so that I don’t waste time putting them into future sections of the story.
[details=Relevant Quote]“Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They’re not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing you can’t do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.”
― Rob Siltanen[/details]
You are an outcast designed to test humanity’s strengths and weaknesses. Through your choices – the paths you take, the one’s you speak with, and the ones you ignore – the world is shaped. Choose well, and choose often.
2/3 of Chapter 1 Finished ~4,000 words per branch; ~12,000 words total You can see a rough outline here (warning spoilers): https://docs.google.com/document/d/14f0cuEdNYlFJ0SS8KCvB9jsWiF4VDa_QZK94jeq4hCs/edit?usp=sharing
I am looking for feedback along the lines of:
1. The current content; do some sections drag on for too long, or do I need to flesh some things out? 2. Transitions 3. Character design 4. Clunky dialogue 5. What I can do to make the current section more enjoyable 6. If my product actually needs a warning label. 7. Anything else you want to share
First Posted: May 25
**5/26 - 5/27**
Percentages into Dollars