Interest Check Thread


#942

@Bathala @ParrotWatcher @Cheion @TSSL Quick update on this game! (I tagged you since you replied and I assumed you’d be interested.)

I’ve already chosen the name for it (“Voltaic”), so that’s a thing. Also, I’ve decided to reduce the cast to 6 to make things a little easier on myself. I got rid of the mean girl duplicate, a guy who was just… there, and the nice girl duplicate. I already have “death” scenes thought up for 4 different characters (the mean girl, the best friend, the mean guy, and the female love interest, names withheld), just need to think of ones for the leader of the group and the male love interest. I also decided to go for full customization at the expense of my outline being difficult to write. There’s also a ~secret~ romance option now. :wink:

The main issue I have now is that I don’t know how to handle the player entity and the way it communicates with MC. Originally, I was going to write all dialogue between them as pure first-person. So the entity would be trying to say, “I’m not controlling you, I’m controlling me” (for example), and it would be written as, “I’m not controlling me, I’m controlling me.” Then I thought that was too confusing, so I figured I’d write it out as normal dialogue, but now it feels very Beyond: Two Souls. So I’m not sure if clarity or originality is more important in this instance and would like some feedback. (I’m leaning towards clarity, but…)


#943

I’m a little bit confused :sweat_smile: but my vote will go to clarity. Going by that quote you used, “I’m not controlling you, I’m controlling me” is clearer.

If you want purely first person, maybe italicising can help to clear up some of the confusion? For instance, “I’m not controlling me, I’m controlling me.”


#944

I think referring to the player as “you” and the character as “me” is the clearest way to do it.

“You don’t control me. I make the decisions. If I think it’s dumb, I won’t do it.”


#945

Hey, just thought id post a link to a bareback concept game i have.

https://dashingdon.com/go/3452

All the info is on the start page in terms of plans.

If any one has any ideas in terms of stats theyd like to see lmk ill be sure to consider them.

TY ^^


#946

Coming up on 6’1 in the awful British imperial measurement system. But, yeah, 6’2 is still above average even here. And while I have a strong preference for playing out my vicarious lives as my mc’s in the boots of a cute tall guy, even most of them would rarely reach 6’6 or even 6’4. Most of them would probably be somewhere around 6’2 or 6’3 in the imperial measurement system. Lord Flash in the Myrmidon is about the only one who would have reached 6’6 or 6’7. But then he was always meant to be a super-cute, super tall, blue-skinned transhuman turned myrmidon/AI to begin with.

Lucky you. I’m relatively short in the land of giants. :unamused:

In response to the rest of your post. Height discrimination obviously exists, particularly for guys as there is no such thing as “petite” for us.

That said I am a bit guilty of the trend towards tall guys in fantasy too myself, as I tend to both like vicariously being a tall guy in my role-playing games.


#947

Lots of different options, suggesting you intend for this to be a huge game. Do you have any plans for the content of the story? All I’ve gathered so far is that you play in some sort of world where all the children are being rounded up and killed. I noticed that you can choose whether you’re 17 or 21, and therefore whether you’re one of the children getting rounded up and executed. Having the story branch so dramatically at the beginning is pretty bold.

A lot of people feel that they don’t want to “give too much away” in the interest check thread but I say poppy-cock to that. If I’m gonna eat at a restaurant I want to know what’s on the menu, ha ha. What would you say is the main selling point of your story? :slight_smile:


#948

Will end up being a pretty huge game. Will you be the persecuted or will you be the persecutor? How will your actions affect and shape yourself, the world and the ones around you? If you pick either age you could choose to support and rescue the children. While i dont like forcing options, you will at first help the children at least till you are out of the city.Locked in a containment cell with impending doom isn’t something anyone wants to wait out like a still fish lol. At this point, you can either become their leader or take your chances by yourself (as im pro free choice i want to try and not force an option as much as i can.), if you choose to become the leader of these children, you will involve yourself in a colony management and life, a bunch of these children are lost scared and a very blank slate, one you can write on. But, if you think making a town in the middle of the wilderness with a bunch of adults is hard, try doing it with only individuals newborn to 17 (i might actually up the age of killing because the pc would seem so close to just being free of persecution. All they would have todo is age one year.) As a persecutor you want to remove these young individuals, they are taking up too much food, they are too high in population, and they challenge the world in ways that scare the immortal elders. Of course not everyone will support this, and you will get outside help along the way. Start a revolution to over take the elders or just do your best to stick it out, out of the way.

So many different options and branches i want to add that it would be impossible to discuss them all here.

I will add on though,

I plan to be as gender inclusive and preference inclusive as possible.

If any non binary, transgender, etc individuals see this, and theyd like to help with this i would appreciate this. (i was looking over my gender and identity selection today and i realized it would have to be fixed. Because if you identified as female why would you be wearing trousers? just realized that it needs to be rethought and such)

Google is not really good at giving me a 100% understanding of such things.

Yes, it can tell me what it is and all the stats and such, but i can never tell me what they face, or what they feel.

Emotions and experiences are what truly bring writing alive.

I plan to be as open and acceptant of suggestions as possible
if you have a suggestion, i will listen and do my best to incorporate it the best way i can while still staying true to my vision.

I plan to not bite off more than i can chew
Some individuals may look at this and be like, dude look at your huge plans you already are. But, what i mean right here is i will be taking this piece by piece. If i’m making a character, you meet them once you will hear of them again. No oh this person helped with one mission now they are not important. I mean to say that, i will do one character at a time to an engaging depth then go onto the next. One area/ branch at a time then the next.

Making a project this big, it is easy to lose track of quality when you also look to quantity.

Which is why i want to treat every aspect like it is a small project. Small but well fleshed out.

@will hope i answered questions sufficiently, and sorry if i went off on an unrelated game tangent lol.

Main selling point would probably be the planned depth and free choice.

any other questions of course ask, it is as i said impossible to describe every where it could possibly go.

if i didn’t hit home with what you wanted, i apologize.

Have a nice day, Hope this helped ^^


#949

First of all it’s great that you want to be so inclusive. Why wouldn’t someone who is female wear trousers though? Clothes don’t determine your gender and limiting your clothing because of gender feels kind of like playing into gender roles, but maybe you have a reason for that in your world setting so I just wanted to point that out.
Your WIP sounds very intersting, it reminds me a little of the Maze Runner series. I’m looking forward to it!


#950

Hi people!!

So I’ve been thinking about this story for a few weeks and I would like to know if anyone would be interested in it in the future obviously, since right now I only have a general idea.

Well the story revolves around the MC (you can choose your gender, sexual orientation and some physical traits) who has the ability to see magical/supernatural creatures. When she was little she passed almost all the time with her grandma and brother (both also have the same ability) since her parents worked a lot and weren’t home to much. So the time passes and one day her brother dissapears, the MC tries to get help from both the magical creatures and her grandma but none of them help her, she gets tired and angry and decides to stop using her abilities anymore and ignore them forever. After a few days her parents decide to move to the city.

Years pass and the MC is now 20 something, and has to go back to her grandma’s house because she died (maybe I can put some options to let the MC organise the funeral idk). Anyways, after the funeral they tell the MC that she inherited the house and she can’t do whatever she wants with it. Of course, the MC decides to try and sell it because the house is old, she has her life in the city and it brings her painful memories.

She contacts an agency and they tell her that for selling it she should at least renovate a little bit the house so she starts to do it. Meanwhile the magical creatures from her past start to appear and try to talk with her (the mc can decide to Ben cold, Neutral, or a little more warm) also while renovating the house she starts to discover new clues that may lead her to her missing brother.

So the main conflicts are:

-Renovating the house for selling it (you would choose how to do it; which room decorate, change the style of the house, etc…).
-Discover where is your brother and if he’s still alive.

Features planned:

-Choose gender, sexual orientation, physical traits of the MC.
-Four romance interest.
-Personality stats and abilities stats.
-Romance, adventure and magic.
-Clues you can recover to let you know the full story of your brother disappearance.

All these features may change when I start to actually write the story lol

So this is it, you can ask me whatever you want and tell me if you have any suggestion (also sorry for the mistakes cause English is not my first language).


#951

You are right, will relook at that aspect. And revise. Am currently cleaning up my stat screen as best i can. Ty for commenting ^^


#952

I loooove it.


#953

So ok I’m trying to get writing again with a fresh idea but wanted to hear some thoughts.

I want to create a whole world filled with superpowered people but I want to make stories about people who don’t choose to fight evil. For about a foot with earth powers starts a construction company or a girl with wind powers starts a wind energy company. Cause let’s be honest not everyone would be a hero.

I’d like to make a collection of these stories into games but make the characters premade because romance and choices. Would this be a bad idea and turn people off from the game?


#954

I really like this idea! I admit I’d still prefer to create my own character, but it would be fun to explore a “super” world like this without all the melodrama


#955

If there are no gay male protags or I don’t like the gay male protags you do have, then, yes, it would turn me off.
But as Nuclear Powered Toaster proves preset characters are not necessarily a turn-off for everybody in this community.


#956

Well in any game I write I never make any MC a set sexual preference. Therefore I leave all ROs open to MC because I’m about being you in that aspect and have no trouble writing romance for all because love is love do very easy to write :slight_smile:

@sviyagin you would later on IIn amore action oriented story but I plan to interconnect stories and having some preset information will make it a tad easier in the long run. Because I plan to write a novel after the world comes to life using g what people do for choices to decide a canon path.


#957

What would the protagonist be like


#958

Current one I’m writing is a male who gains a power of having pure water created from his very pores such he had full control of. He loses his job at a bank due continued prejudice against people with powers. His best friend Jane leads him into creating the first superpowered run waterpark. Your choices determine how it goes, what kind of attractions it has, and more to be determined. It’s only the first story though I plan to have at least 5 or 6 characters with original stories.


#960

Since I was finally able to get choicescript to work with me, I have finally been able to start working on my game

The Tower of The Moon (though I’m probably gonna wind up changing it to something else, since it’s so similar to a current game and stuff)

But anyways the summary is:

Summary

Around five years ago the kingdom of Aterias and it’s surrounding lands were under siege from a extremely powerful magus, it was only thanks to a small group of adventurers the leader of which, was known as The Shining Hero due to supposedly being chosen by the goddess of the sun. They were able to strike back against the magus, however before being killed the magus asked one last request of The Shining Hero, and that was to spare their second in command. That is where you come in.

You are the former second in command and lover of the magus, sentenced to a life of exile with the hero and their adventurer group acting as your keepers. This is how you lived for the last five years, however one day after a strange dream you wake up to a child on your doorstep. A child that claims you are it’s parent along with your dead lover.

As you seek to find the reason that this child is here you become entangled with the shining hero’s adventure group and find that there are secrets that your lover kept from you.

It’s late where I am so it’s just the summary for now, I’ll post details about the RO’s tomorrow


#961

A different stand on an adventure story I like it, I also like the concept of an notorious outsider in the company of hero’s.
I look forward to development.


#962

Slaps down character sheet

The Protagonist

Summary

(Though their place holder name for this is Senri): You are the former second in command and lover of Castor/Cassandra.

Race: Beastchild (a beastchild is someone who is born with the traits of a certain animal, such as with cats having slitted eyes, fangs, claws, the ears and tail. As well as having digitigrade legs with fur covering them) There are four subraces of beastchildren for them

Lapin: Rabbit beastchildren characterized by their speed and jumping ability, most lapin in times of battle are used as scouts and can fight using their powerful legs in a kicking style of hand to hand (or I guess leg to leg) combat.

Hellcat: Cat beastchildren, stealthy and quiet most cat people are utilized for their stealth and flexibility, making for good assassins. Generally fight using a variety of knives and short swords though some will use their claws if pressed.

Lobos: Wolf beastchildren, frontline fighters and guardians due to their strength and pack mentality most lobos live as either mercenaries or bodyguards always sticking together as a group. A lone lobos is seen as a bad omen and there are rumors about how a lobos with no pack will die from the loneliness of it. Typically they fight using two handed swords, as well as swords and shields.

Vixen: Fox beastchildren, the magic users of the world, with their large control of magic and knowledge that is passed down from generation to generation Vixen’s are commonly found in classrooms or courts sharing their magic and knowledge with everyone. A Vixen’s strength in magic is determined by how many tails they have, it’s been recorded that six is the most so far. However there are rumors of a vixen who managed to achieve nine tails.

The Child/Airi

Summary

Airi is a young girl/boy who appears on your doorstep after you had a strange dream the night before. They appear to look like a perfect mix of you and and your dead lover. Airi appears to be around five years old and behaves as such, a cheerful if somewhat shy child. It looks like Airi’s only wish is to stay with you however…you can’t help but feel that something is distinctly off about them.

RO:

C (Castor/Cassandra)

Summary

Your former lover and childhood friend, they were born with powerful magic for a human but like you were a slum rat, living in a neighboring kingdom that bordered Aterias. One day the two of you made a certain promise, and decided that you would do anything to fufill it even if it meant bringing the world to it’s knees. For all that people called them a monster in their final moments, the only thing you have burned in your mind is the gentle kindness they always showed to you, and how they would always smile for you despite the tyrannical mask they put on for others.

A (Asheria/Asherial)

Summary

The Shining Hero, the title of the one supposedly chosen by the Goddess of the Sun despite their demonic heritage. A natural born leader, friendly to all who flock to them,a true knight in shining armor. Yet…why is it that when they turn to look at you there is such sadness in their eyes? In their quiet moments they seem to walk around with the weight of all the world’s guilt on their shoulders. Almost…as if they regret killing the person you loved.

L (Lune/Luna)

Summary

A’s right hand, a serious and tacturn half elf, who seems to act as former adventurer’s group minder. For all that they seem cold and emotionless they seem to adopt a more gentle personality around you. Never pushing you to speak or pester you with questions, they seem mostly content to sit with you in silence or share a drink when offered. They are also your most stalwart defender when it comes to people insulting you surprisingly, almost as if they too regret the part they took in your lover’s death.

Z (Zephyr/Zephia)

Summary

A wandering Vixen Bard, diverting from the norm of vixen beastchildren confining themselves to the pursuit of knowledge they are more happy to wander the world dancing and spreading songs of love as they go. Having met them shortly after your lover’s death they have become your closest friend. A teasing and cheerful soul, they have made it their goal bring you your happiness back as they have said. “Someone with so fair of eyes should have them lighting up with laughter and joy, not weeping or full of pain.” However at times you seem to feel that they are hiding something and for some reason they never do magic in front of you.

I’m gonna try and at least get a prologue and a bit of chapter 1 out by the middle of January, also I’m thinking about calling the story “Black Hearted” but i’ll see where it goes.