Thank you so much! I really appreciate it, and I hope you enjoy future updates!
Yuppers, and sorry about that! Lovely @tenwahi shared how I can fix it, so I’ll be getting on that soon! I might not be able to fix all 3 chapters by the today, but I’ll post it as soon as I get it done!
As someone who can’t always or doesn’t want to communicate verbally it makes me very happy we have choices to not talk and I hope that continues throughout the game.
The lines “I can’t help the happy noises that escape me” and “Buried under millions of blankets, perhaps a stuffed animal or a dozen to cuddle” as well as “Wrapped up in the warm, safe arms of somebody special and trustworthy” are so adorable and pure they just make my soul happy.
Also, the relationship between Al and our MC makes me think of Dean and Sam from supernatural because of lines “Al would stay with me guard against the monsters under the bed” , “You are my beloved brother, I will always protect you.” and “I think that might’ve be the longest he’s gone without checking in on me” as well as the fact it seems he is the one to always be there for us when we have a ?panic or anxiety? attack.
And I just have to say the part with Isa where He give the reasons behind everything was written so well I got asmr tingles.
Btw I was also wondering what the age is of our MC because I can’t figure out if we are in a our last teen years, early 20s or older?
The MC has the option to drink in the game so safe to assume at least 21
I thought that as well but I wasn’t too sure because in the Uk where I’m from it’s 18.
It’s mentioned in one of the paths that the MC went out on their younger sibling’s 21st birthday, so I’d assume mid twenties at the youngest.
Oh silly me lol thank you I must have forgotten about that bit becuase I always go with the flower shop path.
Chapter 4 was awesome! Am so curious about what’s going to happen next, and I really enjoy your writing style.
Did have some issues saving though.
Hi there!! Thank you so much for checking out my game, and for the super detailed response! For Mc’s age, it’s up to you! But personally, I would say no younger than mid 20’s and no older than mid 30s (to me at least, some things feel a bit ehhh otherwise). If it helps any, I answer stuff on tumblr and I’m a bit more active there if I don’t answer here
Also, I’m happy that you enjoyed the nonverbal options! Honestly I wanted to include more, so I’m glad that they were still good enough Also, while I didn’t think of Sam and Dean, I did always love their relationship! So yay, happy that Al and Mc reminds you of them! (and thank gods I’m glad the rational part with Isa wasn’t as much of a mess like I thought-)
Heya, sorry about that! I fixed it I think like a day or two ago, and it should be good now! And thank you so much, I hope that you enjoy the next chapter as well
This was really good! I enjoyed reading/playing and it helped me get through my online class lol
I’m half way through the demo and I am enjoying it so far. My only little nitpick would be that Satomi’s cheongsam seems a tiny bit out of place(?) Cheongsam is traditionally a Chinese form of dress rather than Japanese–which Satomi seems to be. Of course this isn’t really an issue I just found it a little odd to see.
Hey there! Thanks for the pointer- it is out of place but it is on purpose; while yes she’s Japanese she does dress in other styles as well I’m hesitant to say oriental-style as I’m unsure how accurate that would be, but for specifics it would be Japanese and Chinese (at least shown for now)
When saying “oriental style dress” most people on this side of the planet (the US, mostly) would imagine the cheongsam as the de-facto thing being described with such ambiguous wording thanks to most media representation on the matter defaulting to them regardless of ethnic accuracy. It is a very iconic dress after all. That said, Satomi absolutely comes across as the type to sarcastically wear it ‘because I look good in it’, and in this she would be right. She’s definitely the type to say “screw your stereotypes, I’ll do what I want” which is more a strength, than a fault.
Bit of a topic switch, but I had a couple questions that would not fit neatly into just one anon ask due to character limits over on the tumblr page.
I was wondering about what we’d get to do in regards to the ‘unwanted engagement’ with the, as dear ol’ dad put it, “Hellsing kid”. For the sake of simplicity, I’m going to refer to them as the ‘fiance’ because that is true on a technical level, and is suitably gender neutral should they be determined either by the MC’s gender (preempting the crowd here a bit with an, “Ew, pls no!”, because I’m honestly right there with 'em), or the player can pick the Fiance’s gender for themselves. Be kinda neat if the reader could determine if the fiance were cis-gendered, trans, genderfluid or non binary for themselves, but I completely understand if that’s not something you want to consider.
Back on track with my questions, though… Prior text in the story implies that the main character’s family has most likely worked with this particular branch of the Hellsing family, and that the MC might even know the fiance. Will we get to shape that relationship on our own terms (like with flashback scenes), or is it a preset thing that we have no control over? Cite back to my other blur about the fiance’s gender, among other details.
If we do impact it, then can we determine if the relationship with the fiance was friendly? Just coworkers doing their jobs together because it is simply a matter of survival? A sour rivalry? Maybe even a one-sided crush on the fiance’s part? I admit, depending on player choice this last one could play out very bitterly, but in kinder cases could almost be considered a fluffy “love match” (as some arranged marriages founded on “mutual love/attraction” have been termed in the past).
The main character left their family behind because of the trauma of their lifestyle. Always being hunted while hunting the things that would hurt innocent lives. Always worrying that they’d lose those dear to them on a hunt gone bad. Their lifestyle was harsh, and the way things were going they could only get more harsh over time. MC needed a step back; a chance to see the other side, and gain a little freedom from a fate they believed would tie them down forever.
Understanding this, I know my questions about the Hellsing family’s relations with the MC’s family might not be all that important to the main plot you want to work on at all, and that’s part of why I buried these in a hidden text drop down. If much of what I brought up is something you would consider after building the rest of the plot up to a point where you can think about anything extra, then that would potentially make the fiance an “unofficial RO”. Depending on how often they come up in flashbacks, and possible direct interactions if they come to find the MC on their own terms, or mainly to help the MC with what’s going on in Hollowmoon Valley, they might have an equal, or higher amount of ‘screen time’ with the MC. It’s a fair bit to think about, in all honesty.
Final aside: I can’t see a resourceful hunter family just letting one of their own go without making sure first-hand that they’re okay, even if their relationship with the MC is strained. MC knows a lot of things that could put the wider hunter community at risk, I’m sure, so being one hundred percent certain the MC didn’t get trapped in a bad situation is the excuse I see being made if they come along before the MC determines they should call for help. I think the MC is stronger than they know (MC, not fam, though not necessarily an invalid take), and that they can actually get by without their family’s backing, but I also know they aren’t terrible people despite the trauma the MC’s built up. They’re just people.
It ended up being very long, and detailed. Sorry about the mountain of text to work through. Hopefully I’ve spaced it enough to be easy to read, even if the reader has tired eyes.
edit: Big oof on me not catching up on the tumblr asks before posting my Qs! …But then again, I’ve seen some authors go back, and retcon some details that weren’t (sometimes were, but usually not) canon in the book later, because they saw, or came up with something they liked better. In this case, change is highly doubtful, but I don’t hold any non-changes/changes against people’s creative process. The current canon is actually kinda interesting in a “oh, that is bad”, way.
This game falls firmly into the cute-but-disturbing category, and I love it.
I wonder, will we ever be reunited with our family (specifically Al)? Why does Darcy seem to hate us so much? Will that ever be explained? Also, will we ever meet that Hellsing… person that we were supposed to be engaged to? Sorry for all the questions, they just kept popping up in my head as I read this
Heya there! Sorry for the super late reply, and thank you so much for your very detailed post <3 I was thinking the same for the connotations of oriental, so thank you for that confirmation! Ah, and sorry I’m a bit distracted while answering, but please let me know if I don’t answer all of your questions or if I understood them incorrectly
Yes, I have them neutral in gender at the moment, and right now plan on letting player decide. And no, I don’t ever have plans on choosing a character’s gender based off of the Mc’s, either it will be choosable or I’ll pick it. For the relationship between Mc and Hellsing kid, as you correctly guess , yes flashbacks ahaha I don’t have anything planned for that yet, but I will definitely keep those suggestions in mind (they’re really good ideas). Also yes funnily enough, I do have them as an unofficial RO at the moment but I don’t have it as official because I already have 7 other ROs and I don’t want to promise more than I can do.
MC: Ahhh I can’t even begin on how much I love this, but thank you so much on your thoughts on it! I do plan on answering those questions (i.e family letting MC go). Also yes, it is all from MC’s side, so there’s a bit of bias and lack of perspective. A small thanks for that observation
And no worries! There’s a lot to shuffle through on tumblr, so I appreciate you going through them. I don’t have plans on changing what I’ve already gotten down (chapters 1-5), but honestly as I’m progressing there’s a lot of changes from my original draft as I love feedback and finding better things. So also thanks for your understanding! I hope that you find future chapters also interesting maybe like watching a train wreck ahaha
Thank you! I’m glad that it worked <3
Hey there, and thanks! Yuppers, Mc will have opportunities to get reunited with family, although uh there might be some situations in which Mc won’t have a choice… and yes to both questions about Darcy, and for Hellsing kid, I don’t have anything planned yet really, but there will be flashback(s) for them