Hello, and Welcome to “Dark Contract” where you play an immortal being cursed to live eternity in the realm of forsaken. Your only connection to living word is trough summonings performed by witches, who seek contracts with spirits.
Chapter 1: Published. Almost finished. 6k [including code]
Chapter 2: Work in Progress - 1k [including code]
@dreamdragonhatchling Wow this was so much fun to play! I really crave for more Now! !Muhaha No but srsly awsome demo and i look forward for more, its so awsome!
OMG, thanks. Will try, although, I’m seriously slow writer since English ain’t my first language and I have lots dictionaries to look up before typing one sentence. I’ll be 90 when I finish this
Ohhhh i LOVE thoose options muhaha im gonna wreck everyone!!
Also found grammer wrongs:
Oh, I almost forgot!" The witch took off one ring form her fingers. “A ring that makes one my (<----my should be more) pleasant to the eye”
“If a troll wore it, how pleasant to the eye would it be to a human prince? Would she (<—she should be he since its a prince) fall in love with it?”
Since english isent my first language, i cant comment that directly but i found it nonless very good.
Think they are good! However i liked charming the most, since i like smiling and being charming while stabbing.
I think us pretending to be the child and wreck around a little, like maybe hurt the body we are inside: like taking a kitchen knife and stabbing the possesed body with it, in fronth of the childs parents or taking hold of a live animal and starting to eat it alive while somebody watches/catches us. And so on. Maybe also hurting other children?.
A lot of blood, manipulation and maybe romance?
Sry i cant comment on that xD since i dont understand codes.
Thank you dear! I try Also maybe creeping, out our parents with creepy talk like “Daddy i think i love you so much, why dont i cut out my heart and give it to you?” Or “mommy i think i broke my arm” showing her your broken arm or pulling out your nails, hair and so on when you dont get your way or jumping on top of granny and trying to take a bite of her flesh. Muhahha srsly i Will stop now since it Will grow only darker xD
@dreamdragonhatchling - Interesting beginning. I’ll answer your survey and then expand on feedback after.
How readable it was for those whom English is their first language? - It was o.k. A proofreader/editor will help you finalize things down the road. A couple of dedicated beta readers will also do good.
What are your thoughts on three inner and outer personalities of MC? Did you notice them? I assume these are the fire, water, wind and then sacrifice? I liked the concept but found that even if I chose wind, it assigned water to me, and my snake sacrifice was rejected. I had to go with the vole to get it to work?
What more should happen before chapter 1 ends? The choosing of the names part was confusing. I ended up naming the witch and myself the same name. Which is o.k. for now, I guess but could have issues going forward.
What do you want to see in the later game? My mind is fatigued at this moment so I don’t have any idea yet or opinion on the future as of now.
If you looked, how did you like my code? Any suggestions? Thank you for playing and answering! I’m a novice (new) coder myself so I won’t be of help here. You might even teach me a thing or two for use in my own story. lol.
The pacing of the story was good overall, although you might have stretched out a couple of the scenes in chapter one. The background material on everyone involved seemed almost non-existent. You and I are on opposite extremes lol.
I will be happy to follow your WiP so please keep us informed of your updates
[quote=“Zolataya”]
What are your thoughts on three inner and outer personalities of MC? Did you notice them? I assume these are the fire, water, wind and then sacrifice? I liked the concept but found that even if I chose wind, it assigned water to me, and my snake sacrifice was rejected. I had to go with the vole to get it to work?[/quote]
It isn’t simple as first seems. But in time I’ll change up so “hints” are more noticable.
*Flames from candles grow taller/Fire/Snake
*Water in the bowl started to shake/Earth/Hare/Rabbit
*From nowhere a gust of wet wind blow/Water/ Vol
*Leafs, from dried up herbs, fell down/Air/Hen
Alright, I’ll emphasize more that the witch is named.
[quote=“Zolataya”]
5. If you looked, how did you like my code? Any suggestions? Thank you for playing and answering! I’m a novice (new) coder myself so I won’t be of help here. You might even teach me a thing or two for use in my own story. lol.[/quote]
I remember when I first started coding in “choicescript”. It was a nightmare. Only later one I found out how to see other people games codes and that helped me a lot. If I liked some nifty feature in their games I could find out how they did it. That is the way I decided help out and show my code. Plus, show off my way of organizing code with color. It helped me a lot. Less of a mess and easier to find mistakes in code.
[quote=“Zolataya”]
The pacing of the story was good overall, although you might have stretched out a couple of the scenes in chapter one. The background material on everyone involved seemed almost non-existent. You and I are on opposite extremes lol.[/quote]
In the beginning emphasize is on the contract. This isn’t first or last summoning for the MC. MV is like a pica delivery guy. He takes the call, writes dawn the order and then delivers. Right now he has no need to know background knowledge why someone ordered pepperoni and how they got the money. He’s interested only in address and money.
If I understood your question correctly, you’re asking about MC gender. The answer is that since spirits and demons don’t have psychical bodies they don’t have a mental gender. They might take on gender of their favourite host if they like.
Strong enough since the witch was calling for a powerful one.
No but srsly awsome demo and i look forward for more, its so awsome!
I hope you wont mind me asking, how dark will the story be since we are a demon and all 
lol.
lol.[/quote]