It seems that with CoG fans, the majority want a long game more than anything else. It doesn’t matter how broad the game is if a single playthru is only 30 minutes.
In your case, being able to pick the order of visiting each of the cities will make the game long, but allow for replay (if a player builds up their stats in their first two cities, they can do something extra in their final city that wouldn’t be possible if they’d gone there first, etc.).
@HoraceTorys
I agree.
Az, I sincerely suggest packing it all into one thing. That would improve the quality and would in no way make it linear. Choices are what should decide the replay value, not events.
I’m trying to make my game more of an RPG game with lots to discover, rather than tell a story. People don’t need to replay, the slice of content that you will get each each playthrough will be satisfying. Replayability just makes it a lot of fun to experiment with. People aren’t dumb, they will understand that the game is meant to be replayed several times, but it will be fun even if you play it once.
You don’t need to pick every choice in order to enjoy the game. Just knowing that you have a broad spectrum to choose from makes it a lot of fun. This isn’t as true in story-based games, but it is so in RPGs. I appreciate everyone’s opinions, but I’m keeping this plan.
If anyone has any ideas for the game, please post them below. I’ve had a lot of ideas for customization, and I’m hoping to implement them soon.
@Ayzkalyn If Dragonslayer is not going to be story-based, that’s okay as long as you make it fun to play. That’s what’s imortant after all.
After replaying the game many times, I have some suggestions for further improvement:
-when the kids assault the MC and I have to choose the race, the first option would look better if it said “my human face”, mentioning the race like in the other options.
-When the other kids attack the MC and I choose to knock out one of them, I don’t get the knife, It doesn’t make sense. Also, if I take the blade from the kids and later buy another knife from the trader, my items list shows only oone knife, although there should be two. There should furthr be a possibility to keep the knife of the bandit in the tower. The MC might sell the second/third knives later, or give them to party members or they might be of some use later
-I have to write my name, but it’s not clear what it should include: a given name, a full name (given & last) or a nickname? I think you should make a few name proposals like in most other games.
there should be a possibility to work as farmer when choosing my job, especially if the MC already has a farmer perk. Also, priest/magician should be a job option.
when I’ve defeated Taron, I have the choice to leave him or help him, I think the possibility to kill him should be included here as well
-working to earn the 50 coins before setting off reduces my stats significantly but working for the stay in Marik doesn’t, that’s confusing.
the necessary stats to defeat the guards in Varidian are too low, I always had at least one of these options, thus surrendering becomes a silly option. I miss a possibility to bribe the Guards.
-If I surrender here, the MC gets released after a week berauscht they need the cell for another criminal, with strength and willpower slightly reduced. That’s dull, I think there should be a choice to either try an escape or stay and face trial and get a punishment (might again include some choices, like a fine, corporal punishment or penal albor). Also, why shouldn’t the MC meet that other dangerous criminal while in jail and either befriend or fight him? They could either improve their fighting-related stars or gain some skill or item that way.
I hope these suggestions will help you to improve this game!
@WulfyK Only a few options have the MC take the knife. The others attack someone else.
I think that farming as a job option is a good idea. The MC is only 16, so it wouldnt make much sense for them to be a magician or priest.
The guards are a random event that only happen if you are unlucky. I’ll raise their requirements but I prefer to keep random event requirements low.
Surrendering to the guards doesn’t need to be a huge seperate plotline, it’s really just a “failure” option.Working for stay in Marik is just a job. It requires a skill and isn’t a failure option. Working outside the city is really just a failure option if you are broke.
You should only be able to collect one of each item. It’s a bolean, and I usually try to avoid giving the player the same item twice, unless they choose to take it again. When looting corpses and things, it checks to make sure it doesn’t give you an item you already have. Being able to give items to NPCs is a good idea. I’m not really sure how to do that, though.
Thanks for the suggestions. I’ll work on them.
Then you should rewrite this passage to make it clear that the boy the MC knocks out isn’t the one with the knife, I thought it was him.
When I met the guards I always had at least one of the three options, so the “failure” was alvays a choice. The following description sounds strange in-game: if the MC is not suspicious, the guards shouldn’t keep them for a week but release earlier, and if they’re considered dangerous, they shouldn’t be released to free a cell; it’s irresponsible to let a criminal without a trial.
Since the MC has the opportunity to learn lockpicking from Taron, this event would be a good opportunity to use this perk for an escape, I was surprised that the game didn’t offer me this possibility. If they don’t have it or don’t wanna use it for some reason, the MC should face trial and get a punishment as the ultimate failure.
If you don’t want the MC to have multiple knives, you should disable the possibility to buy one from the trader, or replace it with another weapon. Alternatively, use the same script for the knives that you use for the supplies to allow the MC to have multiple knives.
In order to give items to the party members, you can try to create an items list for each of them, just like for the MC but invisible for the player. Giving them an item or money would mean removing the item (or the amount of money) from the MC’s item list and adding it tho the NPC’s list. Try this out, I hope it will work.
Love it
this game is fantastic!
This is one of my favorite WIP’s.
I like the things you’ve added! There’s still a bug where the elf asks for his reward when you found the dungeon yourself. I’d check that with a boolean variable.
@Samuel_H_Young
That wouldn’t work because it isn’t a true/false question. You can collect different amounts of gold in the dungeon depending on your actions, and the elf asked for half of it no matter what.
EDIT:
I was just explaining why a bolean wouldn’t work. I understand that there is an error. I’ll fix it.
I haven’t abandoned this. I wasn’t planning to add any more content to the demo but I’ve decided to add on 2 more chapters and a few more scenes once I’m done refining. It should be updated with a lot of new content tonight or sometime tomorrow.
It’s pretty hard to implement all of the items and perks so that they are used enough to actually be useful. Some items and perks are useless at the moment, and a lot are only used once or twice. It’s a little frustrating. I’m also trying to add in some humor, to make the writing feel less bland. I’ve got a clever idea for the finale of the demo, which should act as kind of a “final test”.
I’m kinda hoping to get it published by Hosted Games and sold for 2$, but I’m honestly not sure if the quality of the writing is good enough. I think it’s fun to play but it has a very loose and unofficial feel to it. I’m going to be dividing chapters into areas, so you can explore the world. I have about 5 areas completed at the moment, and I’m hoping to have a minimum of 20+ in the final game.
If I don’t consider it good enough then I will release the full game for free.
But if I found it myself, why would I give him his “rightly share”? O.O
I didn’t see your edit. Btw, we all seem to think this is great. I certainly wouldn’t say it isn’t good enough to be payed.
Though, I do have to admit that this seems very, very similar to Life of a Wizard; the format, gameplay, writing, stats and choices are all eerily reminscent of Mike’s gamebook. Not that I’m accusing you or anything, and that’s not to say that the story is bad- because it’s not. I actually like it a lot. It just doesn’t seem to be its own. I think it’d be a good idea to adjust it a lot so it differentiates itself from LaoW.
@Samuel_H_Young Clearly, we’d give the elf the money to aid him by supporting his local animal rescue! (:0
@Ayzkalyn I played through your game demo. It was fun, but I have to admit, I was a little uncomfortable playing it at first (I first tried it shortly after you put up this thread, but only finished the first few pages) because the diction is so similar to Life of a Wizard on some pages, and almost verbatim in some sentences on, for instance, the opening page. I know @JimD and @HornHeadFan mentioned this earlier on, and @Samuel_H_Young just now, and I wanted to add my voice to the crowd. (: I was just wondering if you had plans to make some changes (either in the narration, or the names of races, for instance) to further distinguish Dragonslayer from Life of a Wizard.
I also don’t think there’s anything wrong with the quality of your writing, per se - as I said, I just felt there are some passages that are uncomfortably similar to LoaW, and I’m sure you could come up with some good ideas to change things to make it more your own story. I also bet you could come up with some really good text to flesh out the pages that just have a sentence or two.
Like I said in the OP, I was trying to go for a game similar to Life of a Wizard or Choice of the Dragon. When I first started it was very similar. Later on in the gamebook it becomes more different. It will be changed around a bit. I don’t really want to change the names of the races or anything like that. The opening paragraph is very inspired and will probably be rewritten later.
I’m not sure if he is an active forum member, but I’d love it if Lucid wanted to try out the game. His game is basically the entire inspiration behind my own.
@Lucid is indeed an active member.
“I offered my services as a worker for a place to stay. (Requires 15+ Strength)” was unavailable to my character, an orc with 70 strength.
Yup, I’m an active member, but lately my time’s been with Life of a Mobster. 
I’m glad you enjoyed Life of a Wizard. I enjoy writing in the terse first person for epic Life games. Mobster uses the same, which is why I branded it the same way.
I see that several people have mentioned how similar Dragonslayer is to Life of a Wizard. Like them, I’m eager to see how you personalize the game and make it your own.
I like your idea for multiple locations and agree with @HoraceTorys that visiting them in different orders will give a very interesting replayability.