Your story : One of Many

This is an idea that I’ve been tossing around in my head for a bit.
So I learned choicescript and started writing a bit.
It’s basically a fantasy adventure that takes place in the Land of Rebirth.
I hope to have a lot of branching(which equals a lot of writing and coding yay me…)
There are multiple races. The chance to be the villain and you are not guaranteed to be the hero…etc

This is just a little side project for me to do so I am not guaranteeing anything.
I’ll write some more and post up a demo.
If you have any questions go ahead and ask.

DEMO LINK: http://dashingdon.com/play/Faewkless/your-story:the-first-of-many./mygame/

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Could you give a short (or long if you want to) description of what it is about?

@faewkless a small or longer descriptive summary would be nice.

In the land of ancients The first to find and harness magic were the “Ancients” of course having magic and being mortal they used it to advance themselves in as many aspects as possible but it had unforeseen consequences that one being the creation of a “Lich” a being that pulls magic out of all living things with it pulling more and more magic as the lich ages both keeping the “Lich” from aging to death and killing things around it at varying rates.
This also led to the birth of the “Hero” the only being capable of killing the lich a person with large magic reserves that are incompatable with a large majority of other people. After the hero of the ancients killed the lich this marked the beginning of 1L A time where the hero led the other ancients to take over other lands and also led to a majority (if not all) of the humans being enslaved along with the relics at the end of 1L and the start of 2L of course another lich is born but the hero was a human unbeknownst to the ancients when the lich started its kill everything the humans rose up and escaped to the land of rebirth normally the ancients would have crushed the humans but a few things helped
1:Humans had picked up on magic
2:The hero was human so the ancients had no way of fighting back
3:They had the help of the relics
So of course the ancients were almost completely wiped out the rest either disappeared or are mistreated or “Indentured” (read enslaved) of course the hero once again kills the lich and this marked the beginning of 2L and the rise of humans and relics.
The game takes place at the end of 2L where the lich will appear again (its a cycle)
the MC will either be the lich the hero or in the heroes party.
And depending on your role it decides your objectives.
(Does this sound good? and explain everything or do you have more questions?)

This sounds cool but it seems like a lot of writing especially if we can pick to be the hero or lich.

I’ve always dreamed of being a lich. Thank you for making dreams come true faewkless. :joy: :pray:

http://dashingdon.com/play/Faewkless/your-story:-the-first-of-many/mygame/

I’m posting this to ask how the it feels.
(The writing the pacing of the story and etc)
Basically any criticism.

I liked it so far, to me it’s a little hard to judge it on what little there is. Umm, it seems interesting, but in picking our race, are we supposed to be so in the dark in what the races are, do? I made the relic choice but I don’t really know the difference. Could you add a little lore when we start out, about the different races, what the world is like, etc.

I’m gonna add a short explanation so don’t worry I just wanted to gauge out the pacing and my style of writing.

Well ok then, the dialogue choices after you wake up are a little confusing, especially the middle one. The writing seems fine, but it might be a little fast, maybe a little more descriptive.

please cause i’d like to know more about the shadowborn cause now i’m thinking they were a race made by the Lich to protect them and they somehow broke out of his control… but you know your the writer so it’s all up to you

They do not serve the Lich I swear this.
They are just an extremely old and extremely secretive race.
(Old as in around billion years literally) and they were just recently found (recently as in few thousand years.)
and are called shadowborn both for their appearance and their origins.
(Origins being the Shade forest a magic forest thats extremely dark 24/7)
(appearance being that they are literally all pitch black -except for the red eyes-)

Also while they don’t serve the Lich they might help them for reasons known only to them.

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ok now they seem even cooler, can’t wait to play the whole game as them

Did a little rewriting on the the startup and the chapter after it and lengthened the chapter too.
Any thoughts on Nera insofar?

i like Nera i also like the descriptions you put into the race selections

I have another question.
Did you intervene or not.

When going to.punch bandit which enhanced strength and speed I get act_1 bad line

i intervened because i felt like playing the overconfident but naive character so when we first spoke with Nera i said i could run circles around her then intervened

@Lightsavior Fixed. The game should end at around that point.

Now to do something very important…
sleep… :zzz:

It says that I can’t find the web page for your demo