The Fall of the Golden Kingdom (WIP)


#1

This summer I decided it’s time to start working in a story I’ve been brewing for a while. So I created this account today in order to stop being a lurker :sweat_smile:
It’s a fantasy/adventure game with no combat “per say”. What I mean is it’s just based on your choices and conduit.
I’m looking for all sorts of opinions, from ideas on what to change/implement, to spotting errors (I tend to do that a lot and I apologize) :persevere:

Small excerpt:

It has been many years since the exodus. When humans had to flee their homes, their world. Just to find themselves in this one, ruled by spirits whose whims could level mountains or dry oceans. But with all things considered the humans were rather lucky. The spirits made a city for them, and all they asked in return was knowledge, “Where are you from?”, “What was your world like?”. They still had questions to this day and their curiosity seemed far from satisfied.

But the humans had different concerns now. Two brothers were fighting for the throne in typical human fashion. This was the first war that would happen in the world of Amandatium and unfortunately, it would only be a trigger for far worse events.

You were born in this world, so its your responsibility to save it and construct a future for the forthcoming humans. This is the beginning of your story.


Currently working on:
So far I’m still working on the introduction, since it’s the chapter that will initialize your character and define a lot of what you’ll find.

What this game has

  • Blank slate character
  • Fantasy setting, with magic and original creatures
  • Fleshing out the world as it’s played so that it doesn’t overburden the player in the beginning.
  • The choices that are made change the conduit of the player, which in turn will alter the choice possibilities in the future besides the story itself.
  • Multiple endings.
  • Gray morality/choices (there isn’t a good or bad choice, that depends only in the opinion of the player).
    - What else you think should be added?

#2

I think what you have got more enough there to make a great story. So don’t put to much on your plate, so in my opinion it’s fine already. But I ain’t saying more shouldn’t be added at all, if you catch my drift :sunglasses:.


#3

Makes me think we’re to choose a faction at the beginning.

But,

-this has me thinking we’re that blend of grey that dances between black and white-- or serves as another color come to devour.

But s’all some thoughts. Just ask to.

Of course’mm, I’ll be denying I’m incredibly vain, but what’ll be your hand on how we’ll be shaping the MC’s appearance? Will it bear weight at all?


#4

That is correct, you can choose to support one of the brothers, or try and help both (a double edged sword is hard to handle though), or make your own claim to the throne, or you can just ignore that and focus on other problems ( but that does’t mean this situation will resolve without consequences to your story)

On the character customization note you will be asked some questions along the introdution in which your answer will determine a couple of hidden variables about the character appearance, but this is mostly only used in descriptions and will not impact the story at all.


#5

This sounds really cool, I’m looking forward to it! I like the idea of humanity having to live on a world where they’re not the dominant species :stuck_out_tongue:


#6

I’m likening the sound of this cant wait for demo


#7

Seems like an interesting concept and can’t wait to try out the demo when it comes out.


#8

This sound interesting, can’t wait for the demo.


#9

@cabinpersephone @Harley_Robin_Evans @Nvswift @sweetkid

Thanks for the interest! :smile: I’ll work hard to make a playable demo soon


#10

Seems interesting! Will there be romance though? o3o


#11

@Teru
That’s actually something I’m still undecided about, the main story is set and it has interesting characters that could be romance options, but the flow of it is quite fast and I’m unsure if imputing romance will damage the flow of the story. After I finish the introduction and first chapter I’ll make a demo of it and make a pool about romance, that way people will have an idea of the flow and help me decide.


#12

So this summer was very eventful for me :sunglasses:, but I finished the introduction as I wanted and made a flowchart to help me get a better view of how much work i need to do. It was eye opening, even though every run only has 5 chapters + introduction, due to all of the possibilities I will have to write a total of 26 DIFFERENT CHAPTERS.

(here is a spoiler free flowchart so you guys can get an understanding of what i’m saying)

Before anyone says I’m exaggerating take in mind what a consider a different chapter is a different setting, with different NPCs, objects and skills to find. (example 2.1 is in a forest, 2.2 in underground caves and 2.3 is in the golden city)

So I came to a logical conclusion, this project is too big for the first time I’m trying on ChoiceScript. I won’t abandon it no way (too attached to it plus it already has a lot of work on it). I am however putting it on hold. I’ll pick up one off the smaller stories I wrote and practice with it. When I’m happy that I know my way around I’ll come back to this, thank you for the feedback so far, it will be of use.


#13

I believe many authors here on CoG do this as well. Its completely normal to have one big project you put on hold while you complete smaller ones. They will train you to make your masterpiece even better and its ok even if your current project is on hold for years. Its better to wait for one big achievement than expect it to be big only to have it be rather mediocre by average standards because you didnt invest as much as you could have.