Tokyo Wizard Post-Release Discussion Thread (v.1.1.2. 165,000 words submitted to CoG 6th March 2024)

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Become a powerful wizard or witch in modern day Japan! Learn Shinto animal spirit magic, powerful battle spells, or choose the path of necromancy and command an undead army!

Tokyo Wizard is a 150,000 word interactive fantasy novel by Adrao, where your choices control the story. It’s entirely text-based—without graphics or sound effects—and fueled by the vast, unstoppable power of your imagination.

Can you free Tokyo from the evil menace facing it, or will you be consumed by dark magic?

  • Learn over 60 unique spells, divided into magic schools such as necromancy and illusion.

  • Battle or befriend an array of Japanese mythological creatures, including guardian Nio, bakeneko, forest Kappa and powerful elementals.

  • Three different game paths with 30+ endings.

  • Restore yourself to life with the save system.

Please post here for any discussion about the game after the release. Any comments, suggestions, constructive criticism, are welcome. I have very thick skin, and criticism (even very negative) is welcome, as it can help me to think on how to improve for the following games…

I also created a facebook page for anybody that wants to follow:

And, thanks again to @Lordirish for the CSComp that started all this, and to the wonderful staff of CoGs! (I know lots of work on their side goes on to get things like this released!)

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First I’d like to note that I very much enjoyed the game. I loved the interactions with the two most plot-relevant characters, and I very much enjoyed how our original master’s true intentions were hinted.

However, I do have one notably criticism:

Railroading. The initial portion of the game is heavily railroaded, made most obvious when we are forced to break up with our significant other no matter what. This railroading seems to lessen significantly later on, but it feels like we should not even have been given a choice about having a partner if we have no choice relating to them when given it.

Perhaps I missed an opportunity to refuse to my master’s requirements, but I don’t believe I did.

No matter what, I did very much enjoy my time playing through the game, and recommend those who are on the fence about purchasing it.

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I will try to give a more in depth reply later (when my brain is fresh) but I have to say that I really liked it.

Oh, and minor grammar error (I’ll put it in spoiler)

[spoiler]Shout to them man, and tell him that he has dropped something

I think that ‘them’ before ‘man’ should be ‘the’[/spoiler]

Oh, and one thing I did also notice, especially like if you choose a girlfriend/significant other. In future games, you might have them ‘converse’ more.

As an example (once again in spoiler tags):

[spoiler]
Emma looks slightly confused. “What do you mean, you want to break up? I thought everything was going fine between us?” You nod, and insist that you just need some time to finish some things, but that you can re-think things later. Still confused, she asks you if there is somebody else.

At least for me, the last two sentences would work better as if it was a conversation going back and forth. As an example:
Emma looks slightly confused. “What do you mean you want to break up? I thought everything was going fine between us.”

You nod, but say “I just need some time to finish some things.”

Still confused, Emma asks “Is there somebody else?”[/spoiler]

Another bug: If you pick this top choice, it doesn’t lead to anything:

“I’m looking for somebody to teach me magic. Do you know of anybody around here?”

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This was something we complained about a bit in the beta thread, and we did manage to let you get back with them at the end. And given the antagonist’s character, it’s probably for the best that they were out of your life when the rest of the story happened.

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Haven’t got the chance to pick up the release yet, but you know I will. Just wanted to say congratulations to @adrao on your first solo game. Here’s hoping it does well and you manage to make your next one even better.

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@LanaRose, yes, sorry for that. Unfortunately this was a structural problem that got woven into the game fairly early, given the nature of the theme of the CSComp (poisonous intent). Originally I had wanted to write a much lighter story about a wizard in Tokyo, as my gf is fan of harry potter (I wanted to write this game for her, in a certain way), so the idea was that she should be able to see herself in the story. When the theme was announced the game started to become darker and darker (she HATED that part, and the looked at me very strangely/angrily the first time she read the story… I guess she was the first to complain). After the CSComp I tried to “rescue” the game and make it lighter, though certain structural elements were already so deeply written into the story that it was difficult to change completely without re-writing everything. People like @ParrotWatcher, @Curious_Boy, and many others, complained deeply about being forced into a relationship, and then being forced to split. I think in the game as it stands it is possible to choose not to be in a relationship (and just have a “best friend”, though the game still sort of leads you into it, as this is one more way to make the MC hate a certain person). This was then compensated by allowing the possibility of the MC to get back together, if the proper options are chosen. So, I guess the story in the end becomes one of the survival of love through incredible hardships . But, really point taken, I will never make this mistake again in any of my stories (you live and learn!)

But, I have learnt much from this story (my first solo one), and I’m trying to improve my writing, storytelling and structure (@SeventhJackel, I hope I will indeed not make the same mistakes again). I do try to listen as much as possible to people, as a game should satisfy the reader and not just myself (and I deeply value feedback, thanks @Lys for the typos, still amazed that there are some, after the extensive proofreading by so many people). However, making big mistakes early on (as in this case with Tokyo Wizard) do influence the final product (especially early structural mistakes have a difficult solution afterwards, though I did try my best to partly correct for this).

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Congratulation for the release!! XD i rarely had a time to be online, so sorry for my late post :grin:

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Just a few more observations, as well as some points you mentioned above.

First, don’t sweat the bit about typos. You notice I didn’t complain about them myself, only pointed out some that made it through. Obviously, you do want to try and minimize the amount that get made, especially when it is a work you put up for sale. However, if AAA companies or major publishers can’t stop typos from getting through, and we’re talking about companies that can afford editors, there really is nothing a single writer, and readers will catch.

Then you can also run into areas of stylistic differences. Things may arise which are technically ‘wrong’ from a grammar point of view, but has become a big part of your work. I know overuse ellipses, for example.

Others have mentioned structure, and there were other places (like the one I mentioned) where I think direct conversation would work better.

This is a very important point, but also be aware you won’t be able to please all the people all of the time. It’s alright to make something you want, even if others will disagree. This isn’t to say to ignore feedback, far from it, but sometimes it can get much.

For example, about being railroaded. Sometimes you can’t avoid it. I’m one of those who liked Fatehaven, and that is much more railroaded than your game. There are many who are fine with it, and others who desire more freedom. Of course, adding complexity also makes it much tougher for the writer to finish a game.

That said, as @LanaRose mentioned, when it comes to relationships, that is one thing people in general don’t like being ‘forced’ into, if you can avoid it. I’m not talking about establishing previous relationships since a character doesn’t sit in a vacuum; giving them friends, family, etc. is fine. It is when people forced into a romantic relationship that it gets under their skin. Heh, and I’m a person who loves developed relationships in games, but if I’m told ‘you are attracted to so and so’ that is enough for me as the MC to say “Um, no.” (For the curious, this was my biggest complaint with Psy High, when it said I ‘had a crush on so and so’)

However, for a first solo release I did enjoy it. I admit, my favorite parts were actually interacting with the other supernatural creatures. Then again, I admit I’m a sucker for a magic story where the player is essentially an apprentice at the start, and you are trying to learn things.

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I am am always thrilled when one of the comp pieces is published, congrads.

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Ugh, I forgot to add this, but the following is a big positive. I appreciated the fact you allowed people to adjust for difficulty. Some people like to have something really tough…but others like to enjoy a game for the story/interaction/etc. without wanting to restart it if they die.

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@Lys, thanks, glad you enjoyed! :slight_smile: As I said, I learnt much and I’m trying not to make the same mistakes in Highway Marshall (next WIP), though people are still pointing out the need for extra character development (I guess I’m still too stuck in situations and environment, but I will keep on working on it). Otherwise, the difficulty factor was a necessary addition to please people, as there were many complaints from those that didn’t want to play it as a game. Thus, it can now be played more like a novel or a game, depending on what people want (the save system was also required for this).

@Lordirish, I’m already starting to block next May for the CSComp, it seems to be the only way I can get enough motivation to actually finish things! But, hopefully next theme will be a bit lighter? :wink:

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The game is good but I’m really confused about something.

We can choose blood type A but when it come to your main affinity you cant take earth for no reasons other than hey they dont make magic bolts of that type but what point was it to choose to do earth magic at all if its alway going to be inferior to the others? I get that it can be usefull as a secondary skill but in the end choosing blood type A just give you a stronger secondary skill? Can anyone who finished confirm me that it have any use at all or should I just scrap my game and do air/water instead? Because honestly I’m a bit disappointed to be offered something if it turns our to be useless. Especialy considering we cant choose to focus on that for a reason that I honestly find really really dumb.

I get that my complain itself is dumb but its pretty frustrating to have some choices you want to make only to be told that you cant because your mentor just doesnt feel like teaching you a earth spell as your first one or something.

I heard the game was a bit railroaded but is it seriously even railroading what magic type you’re going to use? Why would I choose to be great at earth magic if it mean I will suck at my main affinity and okay at the secondary one?

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There is no earth bolt, but if you follow the necromancy path most, if not all, of those spells are earth powered. Blood type is also a very minor boost. It won’t have any major effects on your power by the end.

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So the only good point to earth magic is necromancy? That feel a bit disapointing to be honest. I guess I’l need to make another character.

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Sorry that this feels slightly frustrating. I never thought that the game was particularly imbalanced towards one of the elements (but do let me know if you feel that way). However, it is clear that each school has different types of spells. If you want to blast your way through the game then Fire (and then Air) are probably the best, while Water (and Earth) are more associated with life (Earth also with death). So, there should be some particular feeling to mostly going for one element or another (though things are done in a way that it is probably difficult to fully maximize one element, so you should be playing for one of each of the pairs?). That was the original idea at least, not sure how it all plays out in the end? (please let me know)

As @SeventhJackel points out most of the necromancy spells are earth based, as are some in Kamakura (Familiar Mana Link, Soul Tree, etc). It is also possible to find the Summon Earth Elemental Spell, and the affinity you have with the earth element determines the strength of the elemental. Basically, these choices become more important later in the game, as there is a “Fire/Air”, “Water/Earth”, and “Earth” (necromancy) branches. However, the initial choice of blood types will very quickly dissipate due to later choices (one early reader suggested it to add a bit more japanese flavour to the game, as you often get asked such things over here)

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Honestly my confusion mostly come from the affinity part. We are given the choice between three spells to determine what magic stat will be our strongest one but earth is not an option and the given reason is that there is no spell to make a bolt out of earth so it feel frustrating because it come out as if this is the only reason why we cant choose earth as our main affinity.

I alway loved doing earth magic because its the one i believe have the most defensive potential and minimise the chances of doing out of battle damage because it is just modeling the earth instead of blasting fire, water or air around without too much control so seing that not only we cant choose it as our main stat, its also only truly usefull for the necromancer path or a secondary skill to water really made for a frustrating moment since I must make a new character to whom I wont connect as much anymore.

Dont get me wrong, I think its a good game and I dont regret buying it. I remember this from the first version but back then I though it was only limited because of the time it took to make the game and you were in a hurry because of the competition so I just accepted it and enjoyed the story.

Also does this also mean that there is nothing for air/earth mages? Because I might just need to make ANOTHER character if its the case.

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No worries, you are making fair points. There are a number of important spells for each of the different schools. For example, Air has Control Person and Forget (which can both become important if you don’t want to kill, though they can both also be used in evil ways There is also a Vampiric Elemental Absorption for each element though by that point in the game not all are useful… Lighting Bolt, Fly, Levitate are Air (which can come in useful), Strength and Giant Strength are Earth (combat spells), etc. I don’t have my notes in front of me as I write this, but by the end of the game I don’t think Earth comes out badly (probably probably Fire does, but that is just due to the person teaching you at the start, so somehow I guess there are relatively less options for Earth and Water at the start, and far more towards the end, and vice-versa . I feel that much of this is due to the logic of what each of the elements are about, and the different teachers you meet… so if you want to concentrate on Earth/Water you might have to find one of the other teachers as soon as you can… the game does diverge roughly around what was there at the end of the CSComp, depending on your choices) If you haven’t played it I reckon it’s better not to tell you more, but there are basically many spells for each school, or so I hope…

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But what would that mean for an earth/air mage? You mentioned three branches wich are fire/air, water/earth and earth necromancy but earth/air wasnt mentioned.

Your explanation lessen most of my worries but I’m still unsure about trying this build since it seem like it wont mean well for me if I dont want a necromancer path.

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There isn’t always a spell to choose from each of the four schools, so a complete Earth/Air is impossible, you probably need to play mostly to one element, then a second one, but inevitably you will have to learn spells of other schools as your teachers all have agendas in their heads -so they are not letting you do whatever you want for their own reasons- So, the start of the game has more Fire/Air spells, though there are also a few Water and Earth. Around 30% of the game things start to branch off, and each of the branches tends to have more of certain types of spells. I.e. you can encounter necromancy spells even if you don’t go down that path in the game, though there will be noticeably less spells. An Earth/Air build is possible, if at the start of the game you choose mostly the air spells (with the few earth that come every now and then), and later you pick the Earth/Water branch, picking mostly earth spells and the occasional air spell that comes around. For example, the Summon Air Elemental spell can only be found in the Earth/Water branch, though there are comparatively few other air spells in that branch. However, as you have already noticed it is impossible to just do one school, so you might end up something like 60-70% Earth, 20-30% Air, and 10-15% of a third element. I never really tried to maximize just the one element, but who knows, I could be wrong and it might be possible to get higher than that…)

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(sorry if my last sentence sounds a bit useless, considering I’m the author. It’s just that I was always more worried about the logic of the spells and why each of them was taught at each step in the game than trying to max one value or another, even though maxing their values in many cases influences their strength. This can obviously be important if you want to play on the higher difficulty settings…)