The Magician's Task (WIP) [Chapters 1-3, 74k words] (CLOSED FOR NEW THREAD)

nonbinary-inclusive
high-fantasy
gender-choice

#1

Hey, there everyone. I am Samuel, the author of the HGs Trial of the Demon Hunter, Captive of Fortune, and Foundation of Nightmares, here with another WIP called The Magician’s Task. And this one will ACTUALLY be GOOD. :0 :0 :0 What?!?!

This one is going to be an epic, medieval high fantasy set in the world of Lume, which is the same world that my previous three HGs are set in. You are a magician living in a small village outside of the Kingdom of Githrad. At first, you are just living a fairly normal life. You have to go to work, deal with bullies, and pay the rent at your parent’s house.

You can choose between being a guard, a scribe, a farmer, a thief, or a clerk at your parent’s general store. You get to have fun, too, like playing in chess tournaments, sparring, reading at the library, exploring necromancer’s caves, and exploring the woods.

Then, a horde of demons attack your village and everything changes. You will be trained by the powerful and quirky wizard, Melithar the Eccentric, and journey to the kingdom of Githrad with a healer, archer, swordswomen, and a thief who is also a demon huntress, in order to become the kingdom’s general and help them fight against a much, much larger threat: an entire army of demons!

Oh, yeah. You’re also “hijacked” (NOT possessed, damnit!) by a demon named Zaleth.

Here are the current features:

  • a very small demo (3k words) to get you hyped while I write the rest of the first chapter, and the rest of the yuuuge book, and so on.
  • vaguely humorous narrative and dialogue by an introverted guy who is on the autism spectrum and has never written or done anything funny in his life

Here is what there WILL be when the book is finished

  • 500k words of content.
  • be someone who is “hijacked” (NOT possessed, damnit!) by a demon named Zaleth.
  • 8 different romance options: 4 male, 4 female
  • choose your gender: male, female, or non-binary
  • choose your sexuality: straight, bi, gay, or asexual
  • tons of cool achievements
  • a crazy amount of replay ability. Even on the very first choice. Try it!
  • lots of (hopefully) three dimensional characters including your family, a wizard, a healer, an archer, a bully and his cronies, a king, a servant, an adviser, a knight, multiple demons, a grumpy farmer, a VICE-captain of the guard, a thief who is also a demon huntress, a werewolf, a fairy, a witch, and many more!
  • lots and lots of stats, detailing your skills, knowledge, attributes, relationships, and inventory
  • three different kinds of magic for you to choose from: stealth, light, or dark
  • probably more stuff that I’m forgetting
  • even more vaguely humorous narrative and dialogue by an introverted guy who is on the autism spectrum and has never written or done anything funny in his life
  • I wrote this in one hour while listening to American Dreams by Papa Roach on repeat

Demo link: https://dashingdon.com/play/mastersamuel/the-magicians-task/mygame/index.php?cb=23112

ALL sorts of feedback is appreciated. Typo catching, bug catching, suggestions, comments, flattery, stroking my very tiny ego…

Also, I’ve included a poll for your favorite major characters, because I’m curious. As the demo gets larger and larger, I’ll add more characters to the poll when they’re introduced.

  • Killian the bully
  • Petre the bully
  • Verim the bully
  • Zaleth the demon
  • Keano the archer
  • Rigel the healer
  • Mabelin the vice-captain
  • Violet the demon huntress

0 voters


#2

YES!

On a related note, glad to see you working on another wip! Looks like I have more things to read added to my list.


#3

[details=Grammar]


Your
[/details]

[details=Inflating your ego]


Nice description. It allows me to easily picture just what types of people these are.

Lovely dialogue.[/details]

Writing

Starting back-to-back sentences with the same word.

Maybe try a different adjective than “hard.” Also, this paragraph could be more consise.

Break into two paragraphs.

General
Although the path I took was rather short, I enjoyed what I read of it and look forward to seeing more.


#4

Great feedback! I’ll fix those little typos post-haste. I’m glad you’re liking it all so far. Each run through only has that one choice, but I was too excited about this WIP to contain myself, haha. I’ll hopefully be releasing the full first chapter in the next couple weeks.


#5

Autism… meh. It’s called artism when you start writing. :wink:

And also…

For real??
I would freaking love to see this! :thumbsup:


#6

Hey man. I am so ecstatic to see a new WIP from you! Like, take a day off and digest the new demo (let the hype begin!)

But c’mon dude. Don’t sell yourself short.

You are a great writer and I’m a big fan! Good luck!


#7

Thanks! I really appreciate that. :slight_smile: Consider my tiny ego stroked.

@Carlos.R
See them you shall!


#8

Will you implement a save feature in the future?


#9

Yep, I definitely plan on doing that when the story starts to get a lot bigger.


#10

While there isn’t much of a beta to go off of, I greatly look forward to how this will develop. I was actually greatly captivated (see what I did there) by your other works. Demon Hunter and it’s sequel was interesting if not very big in replayability.

Good luck.


#11

Thanks! Hehe, great (bad? yeah…all puns are bad) pun. It’s nice to know you enjoyed my other works. I’m hoping this one will be better in every area. (Characters, length, replay ability, writing, etc). I’m going to use all the experience I gained writing my three previous HGs to try to perfect this one. Easier said than done, I know.


#12

A thing I noticed in seeing your beta that I took great pleasure from (other then the amazing sarcastic thoughts that seem to match my own) was the ability to use strength even though you’re a magician.

The conflicting ideals between your typical mage, and what I like making my MC is nice. And you gave me a way to do that. (I’ve always been interested in the idea of a battlemage. Someone who uses strength and magic)


#13

WOOOO! My vaguely amusing dialogue and writing was a success. and I’m glad that you mentioned that (being able to actually be a tough, strong person instead of the “typical” mage) because that’s something I think is very important and I want to heavily implement. You ARE a mage, but a very weak one. You only get to use one minor spell a day, so for the most part you have to rely on your skills, knowledge, and attributes. :slight_smile:


#14

Of course, if I started out as this battle hardened veteran mage that could shoot lightning from his eyes on command I’d be disappointed.

My character should be getting his (mind my “french”) ass kicked repeatedly until either he gets stronger or I get smarter. I love character development.

And I’m glad you think that about the “typical” mage. Although I love a gristled old man with a limp purple hat and a twisted wooden staff as much as the next guy I also would like to see a brute of a person using enhancing magic or something of a sort and breaking that tradition (along with some MORE noses)


#15

Exactly! Well, that’s basically what I’m going to try to aim for in this story. Gradual character development and power development, with tons of different options so you can play as whoever you want to be. (To an extent, of course.)


#16

Well yeah I’d be concerned about your social life if I could detail my character down to the smallest detail. Plus sometimes things can be too in depth. Then I start accidentally glossing over information.


#17

Dayum! What a nice, short playthrough you got there.

Eventhough it’s just a simple, basic, standard “your personality” choice, it definitely show that each choices are drrrastically different. Very different… like I can be 5 different person for each playthrough. :laughing:

*Open my own WIP on the taskbar and quickly close the notepad++


#18

Hahah. Awesome! That’s exactly what I was going for.


#19

I enjoyed the play through so far can’t wait to see more👍


#20

Hey this game is really cool. It remind of a book I read about a guy with a tumour or something in his head that I guess is ‘smart’ but kinda strange.

And is this going to be like that other CoG/ HG game with the robot ship thingyymabob? Like if we get our relationship stat with Zaleth too low will he try to kill us or take over our body?

The game looks really good so far, good work!