Older development thread (The Aegis Saga - Blood)

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Hmm it’s true what you say about the honour system.
Fine for providing some drama and even some potential for an MC, but contextually won’t make sense if there aren’t obvious mechanisms in place to ‘dissuade’ abusers.

This could lead to some deeper thought about the bureaucrats. I mean, what precisely is making them a balance against the queens. . .

Maybe you can offer your MCs opinion on the romancing options later as well. I mention above that I’m not too experienced writing from different perspectives. (That or you could write a miniature storyline of your MCs choices without a huge reference to the text as is, like @poison_mara. ) To be honest it’s fun for me either way.:wink:

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Ugh I love talking about romance options. Gimme.

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You’re late to the party @trinnie, I’m all out of likes :grin:

And that’s a shame because the ‘I’ll have you until I want something/someone else enough to kill you’ faction has been dominating opinions on romance so far. . . :skull_crossbones:

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@nightcap #thequickestwaytoendarelationship

It seems like most romances are like hat nowadays. Not that I don’t like them, but sometimes they can be a bit too predictable.

I like being surprised, especially those that make me be like “WHYYYY DO YOU DO THIS TO ME”

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Hey @Silhuetta:grinning:
Thought you were on a plane to the USA - did you fly the other way and get there quicker? I just got out of the tub in the mood to do some reading - I’m gonna have a look at the awesome short you sent now. Yay.

Getting some space in a relationship:
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/47183494/pics%20charles/text.jpg

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@nightcap , Yeah, it was quicker on the way home.

I read the text at first, and I was like " Hmmm that’s suspicious" but I sidnt catch the first message until I read it for the second time and then I was like:

ILLUMINATI CONFIRMED

600×600 50.3 KB

Anyways, that’s my silly statement for the day.

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The most obvious check and balance is to have both consorts know the identity of all the children, especially those of the other consort, that system has obviously broken down now.

The fact that this consort is wrapped up like a mummy also provides some further possibilities most likely in the form of one of the queens or even a senior bureaucrat replacing or killing him, hiding his death and replacing him with someone of the same height and build. Given the fact that his clothes and wrappings are heavily perfumed, no one needs to be the wiser.
This fake consort may indeed be under orders to either find the most politically adept successor from among the children, or else the most inept. If his boss is one of the two queens then maybe both find the most talented to succeed his boss and the least talented one to succeed the other line, bloodlines be damned.

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On to making myself useulf.

These aren’t choice. It’s a paragraph that you divided in three sentences and called choices. They come out of nowhere, unprompted by the text. They’re just there.

On romances: I actually like the cute stuff :octopus:

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I have changed that now - nice catch @trinnie :blush: Will be included in the next demo update.

That’s a good idea @idonotlikeusernames.

’
The vase shatters and Kaolinise smoothly tallies its value in his bald head without changing his expression.

A tragedy that she’d chosen the second dynasty. If he were a less wise man he might at this point suggest adjourning to the kitchen. Orphela would be welcome to bang his pans around all she liked.

He adds the estimate for the vase to his bill. Then he triples it.

"My Queen, if your servants cannot find the Consort, legally speaking there is very little to be done. You are within your rights however to appoint a second Consort, should you be willing to allow Queen Talia possession of the current one. . .

-smash-

Kaolinise eyes the tinkling shards of glass newly decorating his study floor.

“I am not giving in to that bitch!” Orphela yells.

He’d known that she would have this reaction, but while the envious might call Kaolinise a pedant or a dog of the Yellow Queen, he values himself most as an exceptional lawyer. She’d needed to hear his reasoned opinion.

“There may be another option my Queen.”

“It is not an option within the parameters of the advice that I can give you, but if I’m not mistaken the consort has been required to wear garb that completely conceals his person, and that is perfumed to a high degree so as conceal his illness.”

“Perhaps if you were to ‘recover’ the Consort, others would not recognise a replacement, if the man replacing him wore the wrappings, was of a similar height and spoke in a similar manner.”

He’d known this morsel of an idea would be tasteful to her, and cause her to leave his home. Once Orphela is gone Kaolinise will ask his servant to clean his study before he goes upstairs to tell his husband and family that it is safe to come down.

As he holds Orphela’s fur stole open for her to step into, he is careful not to touch the woman with his fingertips.

As he’d said, the idea of impersonating the real Consort was not one that he, Kaolinise Tremendous, would advise on. There were so many ways it could go wrong.
’

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Okay,
I’m struggling with my ‘affinities’ section, so it would be a big help if anyone could give me some pointers today on intimidating language and phrases.

help out by answering - QUESTION OF THE DAY - :innocent:

“What do people find intimidating?” - 12/04/16

Other aspiring writers out there might be interested in reading the general thoughts on writing stories with choice from megalithic Cog forum contributors @Cecilia_Rosewood, @Silverstone, @Zolataya, @Jackrabbit, @Sovereign2Lilith, @WulfyK, @Doctor on the thread below.

seriously - read, learn, and benefit from the awesomeness

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In games? Normally political brainless characters or stupid each time my character found someone dangerous she acts or using subtly damage plotting or hiding away. I role-playing bards and politicians not warriors. Blunt people are not trustworthy for a political monster.

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Thanks @poison_mara :thumbsup:

Also some feedback from my partner @Trussell (who is still barred) :laughing:

https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/47183494/pics%20charles/abbyb.jpg.w300h360.jpg

‘to be solely for your wellbeing. Did he not see the same thing your did’

‘his great age the old seneschal has his arms tied painfully to rod over his back.’

‘Don’t remember this at all?’

'You think back to that strange energy you’d seen in the bridgehouse. Somehow, you caused it. Perhaps you can save everyone now, if you put your mind to it. ’
Make first magic scene at bridghouse clearer
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/47183494/pics%20charles/IMG_7028.PNG

Hmm that last one doesn’t look so good. Seems something’s up with the save mechanism - headscratch -

EDIT - Thanks to @CJW - who’s provided the amazing save plugins. If anyone uses the plugins and gets the above message then do read this post about safari mobile private browser and cookie settings:

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To answer the question of the what I find intimidating is silince , starring someone in the eye when someone is tall then me and I have to look up to them.

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What do I find intimidating. In game? I’m an aspie with very short attention spam, so big walls of text make me all kind of anxious.

I also flop beautifully in sandbox games because too much freedom makes me dizzy. Sad.

In real life, it’s mostly the crushing weight of my own mortality. And cute guys.

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:relaxed: Maybe I should have phrased the question as, What language might a character use to sound intimidating.

Have incorporated @vampierkid222’s suggestion - yours in that context might be a touch harder @trinnie!

Cue entry of cute thesis writer. Asks @trinnie to run away with with him to explore the wide blue yonder for the rest of their lives.

https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/47183494/pics%20charles/girlpunch.jpg

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Nah, give me a burly knight that is brutish on the outside but soft on the inside.

And I don’t mean his organs and stuff.

On language: depends. I’m not sure this is the best medium to rely in the sound of anything. The sort of language that overpowers you with a stream of short words and hard letters, maybe. Elven languages often have soft letters and long words with a consistent flow, and I don’t find them threatening at all.

Silly, though.

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Good idea @trinnie .

I’ve been reading up on ‘cacophony’ since you posted. One of the better sites I found for the literary use of words for their brutish sounds, should anyone be interested.

I get it, so a guy like a creme brulee? Or myabe a taco.
:taco:

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i love in games pretty girly looking boys like cute angels, but bad and sarcastic hot. Oh, Semryu :heart_exclamation: About Language in Games i don’t get intimidated I get paranoid and plot for killing the rude guy. I hate rude and blatant obvious characters and crying characters and… Well I am easy to hate characters and want to poison them!!! Because that’s so fun for me!

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Honestly, I think romances should serve as a way to expand on an NPCs’ personality and allow some character growth (the PC’s as well), so I don’t see the point of romancing a ~perfect character~ if all I’ll get is an occasional reminder that, yes, we’re smooching.

Give me drama or give me death.

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I’ll admit my very limited reading of romantic fiction is likely to leave my romances slightly flat.

Does anyone have any examples of their favourite CS romances?

If got pretty much all of the released games somewhere or other, so I can look back and have a read.

Any shorter romantic fiction or film you enjoyed might also be helpful for the Saga’s development in this area.

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