Aroderia - The story of White Raven (WIP)


#1

Greetings to everyone. I’m new to this forum, so I’d like to apologize in advance for every misstep I can make. I read the rules carefully, but you know, everything can happen.

I’d like to announce my project “Aroderia - The story of White Raven”. It was meant to be a novel, but after discovering ChoiceScript and learning how to work in it I decided to rewrite it and after that publish it as a text-based, multi choice game. By now I have about a quarter of book written, but it’ll take some time for me to translate it into English (I’m not a native speaker as you could have noticed by now) and edit it for multiple choices.
For the sake of the story, you will have less options to customize your character at the beginning of the game.

The plot:

Here is a short extract from my book. It tells about creation of world and 5 gifts:


At first, there was nothing. The only living entity in the whole universe was the Death. Eternal and never-ending. After millenia of void, the Death decided to create a new world. For completing this goal she needed a help, thus she created her five children.

Goreg - the god of fire

Thélia - the goddess of water

Meregron - the god of earth

Aronia - the goddess of air

and

Perothrion - the overseer

With their help, the Death created the world and mortals. Animals and humans started walking the Earth. However, because of their intelligence, mankind soon became taking advantage over animals. The Death, in attempt of keeping balance between all the living things created various kinds of monsters. Some extremely strong, some intelligent like any human. Their purpose was to keep the human population at rational level.

When the humans found out what the Death had done to them, anger entered their hearts. They secretly met with the gods and asked them to help them. In return they promised to worship the Fifth of gods over death forever and to build beautiful temples dedicated only to them. After long hesitating the gods agreed. From then, random humans that were born had special abilities. Humans called them 5 gifts.

Manipulation with fire - the most common ability
Manipulation with water - the second most common
Manipulation with earth - less common
Manipulation with air - even more less common

and the fifth gift, Perothrion’s gift - telepathy. Mind reading of others. The only hereditary gift, which only a few families possessed.

With help of the gifted persons humans again became the superior species and spread across the whole world. Built cities, empires and great temples for the Fifth of gods. When the Death found out, she looked at her children with disappointment. She decided not to longer interfere in the mortal affairs, except for taking the souls of dead mortals to her realm. The Fifth was left to look after the world and without the ability to see their mother.
She left them with words: “You shall see me only one more time. At the end of everything, when I’ll come to collect your souls.”


Here I wrote a short summarization of the circumstances that surrounds the main hero during his travel:

Aroderia is a large continent, which was for a millennium under the rule of one Empire. However, the last four emperors were weak ones. Southern tribes that came from islands close to Aroderia saw this as an opportunity and attacked a few of the cities at the coast. Barbarians were able to hold their positions for two weeks before being defeated by the Imperial army. This was a signal for other tribes, that the Empire was not as powerful as it had been and started going for bigger or smaller raids. People in the Empire’s territories were horrified. After every attack they felt more and more that the Empire was able to protect them no longer. That’s when the Revolution began. Territories wanted independence from the old and non-functional Empire. They were sick of nobility telling them what to do and wanted to enact something called: “the rule of people”.

I will post a summarization of plot itself later today.

I will be happy to hear your opinions and ideas on how to improve the world, what to change (names mostly), etc.


#2

It sounds pretty awesome, can’t wait to play it! I’m guessing the different abilities are set and branch the story at certain points, or will you be able to pick up other abilities later as well?


#3

lol another Raven story, look forward to it.


#4

“They were sick of nobility telling them what to do and wanted to enact something called: “the rule of people”.”

Oh I can’t be having with this. Be a good sport, and let us have the option to give the revolutionary rascals a damn good thrashing.


#5

Plot:

You play as an young noble whose whole family had been brutally murdered several years ago. You were the only one that survived. After you had recovered, you decided to revenge to men who were responsible. There were six of them. During your travels you discovered a special ability you possessed. However, you ability is not one of the 5 others. It is completely different, it is something no one ever heard about.

You can somehow control the level of fear in others. And fear is the biggest motivation. You can command them to do anything you like. Only those with the strongest will can resist you. After they do what you have wanted them to do, their memories of what you commanded them disappear. The most horrible memories human brain often suppress.

The game starts when you finally tracked the sixth attacker. After you kill him, you will start the journey to find out what exactly this mysterious power of yours is and where it came from.

The important thing to realize during your future playthrough is that your character is not a complete newbie to the world. He has something behind him, he made some decisions in the past that will affect people you encounter.

He had to do something for living during his path to revenge, so he became a hired sword. In the beginning you will have the opportunity to choose what kinds of jobs he took. This will affect your starting financial status as well as behavior of some people you encounter.

There will be no “good” and “bad” decisions. For example your character’s power can be characterized as “bad”, but it is only up to you what you’ll do with it.

So, basically you will have two major storylines - one on the side of rebellion and one on the side of the Empire…what connects them is your search for the origin of your ability. Is it the 6th gift? Or is it a curse?


#6

'Ee, fettling.


#7

Ability to control fear in others? Cool. Sounds like an off shoot of telepathy. If you only control their fear though, how are you getting them to do what you want? A fearful person can be rather unpredictable. Maybe you’re projecting hallucinations into their minds, warping their perception of the world around them to suite your own needs. Just an idea.


#8

fantom - "Maybe you’re projecting hallucinations into their minds, warping their perception of the world around them to suite your own needs. Just an idea. " - this is more or less what I thought.

When you use your power, the person you are aiming at overcomes fear. They can’t move. It is because reality around them is shaping to their worst nightmares. The only thing they know is that you are the only one that can stop it. The only stable point.

Example:
“Who are you working for?” you ask and let the level of fear in your victim drop a little. Now he knows that you are the only one that can stop his misery.
" I…I d…I don’t work for anyone!" he sighs…
You let the level of his fear to increase again.
“aaagh” he screams.


Maybe you could take it as some kind of a torture, but on a more psychical and personal level. If you have some better ideas to make it work, I’ll be glad to hear them :slight_smile:

To your first question, I’m thinking about giving the player an option to choose one of the 4 abilities later in game. I wouldn’t give him telepathy power, because I think it would make him a little overpowered.


#9

Can i be evil or shelfish? And please dont do a game all focus in battle skill, cunning and charming is a good way to achive what you want


#10

Marajade- I will try to make the game as grayish as possible. There is no “ultimate evil” (you can see that I don’t have any evil gods in my mythology) and there also is no “ultimate good”.

You can be as selfish as you want (but you must consider the consequences). I’m also not very keen on combat so there will be many ways to avoid it (sneaking, talking your way out or using your power)


#11

looking forward to it! hope that you can take over the throne by force and make a kingdom where everything you say goes.


#12

My prediction is that death gave you the ability, and you are her champion/conduit on earth. This sounds so awesome!!! Can’t wait!!


#13

sounds cool


#14

cant wait sounds friggin awesome


#15

this is amazing


#16

I am male and i dont really play as female, if a game has only female, it will take away from the game for me, so when i judge games to decide which onew i want if you can only play female it will make me less inclined to purchase it. Im not sexist, its just my preference is my gender playability or no gender.


#17

I’m glad to hear such positive reactions! :slight_smile:
I will release a short demo later this week…so stay tuned :slight_smile:

I would also like to ask. How important is for you guys to have a choice of playing as a female?


#18

For me, not very :slight_smile:


#19

I love been a female because im a girl. But i dont cry for not beeing one, like a lot of boys whine with is the girl the only choice :smiley: . If you put in there make a little diference to give flavour the choice and add replayability, but dont ve forced to include us the women in your game if you dont want to…


#20

Look forward to it I will give back good feedback