Nyctophobia - Update! Chapter one first branch done! 6k words added!

I’ll update thoss typos soon as possible, thanks for pointing them out grammar and typos are my kryptonite. There will be plenty of dark villains showing up, most demented.

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I’m all aboard this story already (though I know it probably won’t be in a demo build) can’t wait to achieve fiend form :smiling_imp: I mean kraken form :space_invader: does seem best for a hero route and fiend form seems like the worst but I love using powers that would generally be considered a power for an evil character for a hero

(Before I go into this I’d like to be clear that this is just food for thought not saying it should be in the story or anything) Assuming the snake/person hybrid thing was a Nightmare it would appear that they have their own personalities and free will so I’m just thinking if it’d be interesting if we run into a Nightmare that’s good or at least not evil however they do appear to be very subject to their own nature which is to kill their target and anything in their way so it probably won’t be a thing but still

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Yeah Kraken is based off a hero I,made for a book its op heals, but has drawbacks ;). Fiend form does seemevil, but you found out quickly that hero’s is this world aren’t the same as comic books. Survivial is the name of the game and your PC hopes they can top the leaderboards. Unless toher paths open :slight_smile:

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Damn this is scary… I LOVE IT! It’s going to be so satisfying to kill those nightmares for what they did.

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Lol. The first half sounded like Bethesda’s Dead Space, then there’s that thing about the Angels, and the comparison’s gone.

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Yep killing nightmares can be your “job” later if you want, other paths include trying to save the world, fighting villains, and finally becoming a villian.

@Joser_Jekter I can def see that comparison! I loved dead space and like that it comes to mind (game scared the crap out of me!).

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I’m more scared when running for my life becomes the only option rather than the monsters themselves, lol.

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I’m planning on making a villain that uses fear to attack you and it makes your MC pretty much useless. I’m gonna do a poll and make different scenes based on a fear you chooses earlier on.

Running is sometimes the best option at first due to your power set. Unless you like reading about your MC being cut, stabbed, etc constantl, as your hard to kill but pain never disappears.

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I like how that sounds so symbolic, intended or otherwise, lol. Well, constant idiocy while still at the prime of your power should be a nightmare to your stats, else it’d be meaningless.

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I really enjoyed the short demo. I will be watching for further updates as I hope you will continue to write this. It does seem to be very interesting. Good luck on this endeavor.

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Just saw this and wanted to answer. He’s not a nightmare he’s a introduction to the villains of this world…their pretty twisted. Nigthmares can talk though but thats far down the line for that answer :slight_smile:
@Checkmate def will be its been my only relief from writers block so far and its my first ever attempt at horror so its really fun for me

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So far this is definitely interesting, and I can’t wait to see what happens next.

Sooooooooooo, will be cross paths with Snake Man again? Or will well end up bumping into another villain? Also, I kind of figured he wasn’t a Nightmare because his coloration was just wrong… or, at least I assume that all Nightmares are the same inky black…

You’d be correct all Nightmares are black, only difference is their design and intelligence. And you’ll have a huge battle with snake-man and get his back story. You fight him no matter what but your choices lead to how and when you fight him.

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He’s kind of an interesting character so far, would we be able to turn him good down the road? Or is he a lost cause?

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He is lost but more due to his power then his actual choosing.

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What exactly is his power? All I got was that he was half snake, spoke in rhymes, is supposedly sensitive to sunlight and can inject his prey/victims with poison before drinking both the poison and their blood… not really seeing how him being villainous isn’t a choice honestly, because he could still technically use his powers for good if he wanted to (admittedly it wouldn’t be easy, but it could still be done). Unless there’s something else about his powers that wasn’t mentioned/revealed so far…

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You got it :wink: there is more to his powers and he was at once using them for good.

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This story seems interesting so far. I like the descriptions that help you to feel the horror of the scenes. My only pointer would be to proofread for grammar and spelling errors. For example, when you make a word plural, you don’t need to put an apostrophe in it (e.g. it should be Metas, not Meta’s). Also, there were a few times when the tense abruptly changed between present and past. But good story, keep it up!

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Oh come on, now I need to know! Gah, I can’t wait to find out! But I don’t want spoilers. Why did I have to find this WiP?! :weary:

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Yeah i’m grammatically challenged, though part of the reason it’s so rough is due to me not looking it over yet. I usually finish a chapter before i do grammar and spelling.

@VioletHikari don’t worry it comes out in chapter one so not gonna be long.

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