Nevermoore (WIP) (Update- April 5, 2021) Chapter 2!

Hello to everyone who sees this! I just wanted to make a quick announcement that I have completely rewritten the demo. Even if some parts look similar to before, I still did edit those sections to make it flow better to fit the improved narrative!

Have fun checking out the new and hopefully better version of Nevermoore! :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:
Now I can finally focus working on chapter 2 haha.

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Really enjoyed the rewritten demo, i liked the old one, but this one gave you a better feel of the story and i also like how creepier it it is and i feel like some things flow a bit better like the diner portion,loved the new tidbits you can pick up listening to the truckers convo, i did get a lil confused by the kids povs, but that was over quickly, i do wish there was some option to leave because the kids are creepy, i know they mean well, but oh boy they give off major horror movie vibes, thomc does kind of leaves anyway.
Anyway really liked the new demo, cant wait for more!

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Those kids are creepy and MC needs to gtfo. I love the writing and atmosphere you created for the story.

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Thank god this is still alive. Proyects like this are hard to come by. Please keep writing!

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Well first off, I’m really happy that you enjoyed the rewritten demo! I’ve been trying to work on making things flow more naturally and have it act more like a supernatural wip. And if I may ask, which parts of the kid’s conversations did you get confused on? Even if it didn’t last long I’d still love to check it out and see what I can do to improve on them!

Yeah I know there’s quite a bit of people who find the children creepy. It’s understandable of course considering the circumstances but they really do mean well :sweat_smile:. Also thank you for the kind words!

Don’t worry, I love this project too much to abandon it. It might take me a long time to finish or maybe even go on hiatus, but never abandoned! So you can rest easy there haha.

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Finally played the new version and I think it flows much better! Great job author :+1::+1:

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Hi everyone! Just wanted to let you all know that the game has been updated with chapter 2! How exciting :blush:

[ Important: Due to me changing/adding some variables, you are going to have to start a new game save file! Sorry about this guys! This is a still a WIP after all :sweat_smile:]

The only thing that’s missing right now are the ch2 achievements because I couldn’t come up with clever names for them yet haha. And when they do get added in it will be a stealth patch update.

Other than that I hope you guys enjoy this and please let me know what you think!

Take care now everyone! :heart:

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Damnit im in class rn!

…im gonna play it.

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The premise is interesting, will totally check out next updates!

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Hey, I didn’t play this one in a long time! So happy because of the updates!

So, I can’t really comment much as for the story since I already did when I first played.
What I CAN say now that I’ve seen more of the story is just how much I love the three teens! I didn’t really get attached to the twins, but these kids stole my heart. I’m glad I was able to select them for the tour!
I’m also happy to have met the ROs, though I’d have wished to see more of them. I got only one scene for each sadly, considering my MC drowned, and from what I’ve checked in the code, it “cuts” a little bit of content and the first possible meeting with two of the ROs, but oh well. No regrets there, I want my unease high, especially considering I talked about it even before it came into play, back when this was uploaded first.

I’m curious about one thing though… How does this game work, exactly? As in, what determines the various endings and so on? It doesn’t seem to be a stat based game, considering MC’s skills in body, soul and mind are used for seeing additional things, learning a bit more from people etc, but I didn’t see actual checks (that’s always a good thing as far as I’m concerned - I prefer story driven games!)… So… I would assume unease plays a part in this, but that aside, I’m a bit clueless… I guess we’ll get choices about how the MC adapts to the place and how accepting they are, but still… that can’t be it…

And now, assorted errors and typos:

When ending the phone call with MC's mom:

At one point she says: “but I’m so excited for you to see cottage”
Should be “the cottage”

By the end of the first scene with the trio:

“We left some of stuff inside when we were there this morning and now we’re on our way to pick it up.”
Should be “We left some stuff” or “We left some of our stuff”.

During the statue scene:

“Because of course it should’nt”
Should be “it shouldn’t”

During the lights scene:

After drowning, if that changes anything.
One of the options is: “No, I refuse follow the lights”
Should be “I refuse to follow the lights”

When talking with Viola and Silvio:

“We’re really am sorry that things turned out this way”
Should be “We’re really sorry that things turned out this way”

Also: “You could imagine me an Vi’s surprise when they asked us for you specifically but we couldn’t answer because we haven’t even seen on what you looked like yet.”
Should be " (…) we haven’t even seen what you looked like yet."

The revelation about the "curse":

It seems the reactions to the revelation about the town’s curse don’t change the calm/emotional standing, even if the options are labelled, and it would make sense for it to do so anyway.

When meeting the twins and the trio outside of the house after dressing up:

This is not an error per se, but it would make sense for one of them to notice MC’s red eyes in case of the “scared” reaction being chosen prior to it, considering they spent a lot of time crying in the shower. Usually, it takes some time for one’s eyes to look totally normal again.

Also, wouldn’t it be logical for my MC to be surprised his spare clothes aren’t wet/dirty, considering he drowned and apparently had his bag with him (which makes sense)? I understand the clothes have to be dry and clean for the scene to proceed, so I’m not saying they SHOULD be wet, but obviously MC should notice his belongings are in good condition, inside of the backpack.

A bit after that:

“And I’m sure Foster would appreciate having some familiar faces around him when the rest of the town inevitably hounds them because he’s the newest resident.”
Should be “(…) when the rest of the town inevitably hounds him because (…)” - considering my MC is male.

When taking the tour of the city:

The last option says: “The area with the library and the town hall. I didn’t get the chance to have a proper look at them that night…since I chose left early and all.”
The last part should say “(…) since I chose to leave early and all.”

When meeting Sterling at the market:

There’s that exchange:
“N-Noel!” Oliver gasps at them, almost scandalized. “Even if it’s true there’s no need to point it out!”

“That’s quite alright, I’m rather flattered actually.” The man assures her, letting out a soft and airy chuckle. “Because not many even pay attention to what I can do. My adopted father would’ve been impressed to such attention to detail.”

Since it’s Oliver who chastised Noel, after Sterling’s answer, it should either be “The man assures him” (if he’s saying to Oliver that it’s fine) or “The man assures them” (if he’s saying to Noel that no harm was done).

When going towards the library and town hall with the trio:

“But I always wanted to see if the movies made it as fun as it looked!”
I understand what they’re saying, but the sentence is a bit confusing… I think something like “I always wanted to see if it was as fun as the movie made it look” would make more sense.

During the same part of the tour:

“Coraline lightly smiles at the teens, before sparing you a cursory glance.”
Coraline didn’t appear before and wasn’t called by name by anyone at that point, so the narration shouldn’t refer to her by name.

I don’t know if I’ve spotted them all considering English isn’t even my language so I’m bound to miss some things, but I hope it helps non the less!

I can’t wait to see more of the ROs!

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This was SO good!!!

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Ah, I would like to quickly correct you there! The stat ‘unease’ was only used to trigger certain scenes in chapter one. What you would want to look out for is the sanity stat, which for obvious reasons isn’t visible in the stats screen. Luckily for you, the variable for that got changed when you ended up going to the pond scene at the end of ch1!
Also, I’m planning to have that stat to (hopefully) affect many plot stuff, esp upon nearing the climax haha.

You are correct! As of now, I’m only using those stat checks for flavortext/additional dialogue and stuff. But further into the story the skill stats will be more important, but lacking in one area won’t have the player be locked out of choices or anything like that. I’m hoping to be able create situations where ‘failures’ will simply lead to unique outcomes, not game overs.

Thank you for pointing them out! I’ll have them fixed and the game updated as soon as I can!

Thank you for your kind words, I hope you continue to stick around!

Haha thank you for showing an interest! :blush:

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I see, thanks!
I tend to play twice lately - once blindly, and once while looking at the code, which gives me some insight, but also helps me spot more errors and stuff like that. I find it entertaining!
So I’ve noticed sanity variations!

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This was fun! And really scary, actually. I always love small town horror, but this one really gets to me. The curses are just really bone-chiling, personally. Being trapped in a town, not being able to age, die, or leave. It feels really, claustrophobic? I would have been driven insane in like, a week or so, most probably.

Not exactly a typo.


But I met him before, so I think him saying that he is excited to know what I look like feels a little strange?

Regardless, this was such a fun (and scary!!) ride. Looking forward to more!

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