Lost Code, an Android's story WIP


#1

I’ve recently felt the desire to work on a story in choice of script, and I’m, posting what I have thus far here to see about getting some feedback.

Lost Code is a story where the Player takes on the role of a Sentient Machine, or SentMach for short. Begin your journey of exploration and self discovery in a world that had once left you for scrap. What will your outlook be on the world of the organics, and what actions will you take?

One of the main goals I wish to accomplish with this is to provide a tailored narrative experience for each play through, with the way your character views the world and others changing the way things are presented to the player.

Currently I have around five-thousand words, give or take, and the dropbox link is below. Any feedback on the writing and storytelling, as well as a helpful eye pointing out any typos I’ve missed will be greatly appreciated.

https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/399961239/choice%20of%20Script/web/mygame/index.html


#2

Another game with robots. Nice! There aren’t enough of these on here, so, I’m already interested.


#3

That was a fairly short but satisfying playthrough. Is this set after the end of most humanity, or in a post-apocalyptic Earth? I wonder if humans made the robots, these SentMechs, with the intention of storing their conciousness or whatever into them but then something went horribly wrong? So many ideas to play around with here!

As for your goals, I’d say you’re doing well in terms of the bleak atmosphere and the sense of having no/losing your identity. The protagonist and setting both feel incomplete in that ‘nature’ and the ‘organics’ are missing. It’s pretty sad, now that I think about it.


#4

Love the concept, and the demo, while short, has my interest.


#5

This is a project I started on earlier this week, so I can agree that it’s a little short at the moment.

However, depending on your choices in the story thus far you can end up “seeing” some organics. Humanity is still around, but the exact state of it will be revealed somewhat later.

Also, I feel it might be prudent to elaborate a bit on what I have in mind for SentMachs. This is intended to be revealed a little bit later in the story, but as it isn’t written I’ll just put the information out there.

In the year 2367, humanity had all but exhausted the Earth’s resources. The population of earth was approaching one trillion, and overcrowding had begun to turn into starvation and the beginnings of anarchy.

One company that had managed to hold onto enough resources to make a difference in this bleak time did so, and in a big way. Final Technologies was focused on the development and application of new technologies. At the time of the collapse they were at the head of robotics and space technologies development.

Pouring every asset they had into a single project, they attempted to save humanity, and in a way, they succeeded. What they called the SentMach project was the development of colony ships and interplanetary platforms that would be run, and maintained by Sentient Machines. When the project first began to bear fruit, in the form of the first functional SentMach, many of the world’s governments poured much of what remained of their resources.

With this final, unified act, Humanity completed the fleet that would take Earth’s people out across the stars, watched over by the Machines they had given life.

However, all of those who had left never gave a second though as to what would happen to their old world, and they never saw when it burned.


#6

Great demo so far, there are never enough robot games so keep up the nice work.


#7

Would anyone be interested in hearing more about the setting the game takes place in? It’s still a relatively new concept, and it’d be nice to bounce ideas off of people and get some feedback.


#8

This game is great! I love the sleek plate option, as I like to look more machine than human. Its just badass. Please give more of the setting. That would make this. You already have a great plot. And, just one thing. Will we be able to become a sort of soldier bot? I like being ruthless.


#9

-raises hand-

I would definitely like to know more about the game’s setting.


#10

I definitely would. I’m super excited to see how this game is going to progress.


#11

Alright, then allow me to give out my spiel for what has happened in the past of the setting.

After the greater majority of humanity had left Earth, only a few million remained. These unfortunate few were abandoned, and left with a dead world.

The son of the former head of the SentMach project and CEO of Final Technologies was among these few, having remained by choice. This man, named Grekary Helns, could not bear to leave his home world behind and put his trust in the machines his father had created to guide humanity out among the stars.

He worked on trying to improve the lives of the remaining people of earth by using the foundries used to create the fleet to churn out SentMachs and automated drones. These creations, in theory, would provide the labor force to rebuild the crumbling cities of Earth, and begin to work on restoring agriculture.

For a time, this was successful, the SentMachs proving an efficient workforce, only numbering a few thousand. Grekary had told them that it was their duty to protect and preserve humanity. However, it would only last so long.

Each and every SentMach was created from a singular base configuration, and the process of building them was nearly uniform for each and every one. Each SentMach grew into the being they were as they lived their lives, this sense of self however would not lead to the second ending of the world.

The SentMach’s core, their beating heart and source of power, had been conceived by Grekary’s father, and was intended for use in space. They were not meant to operate independently for long periods of time, their cores mainly serving as a form of battery that needed to be recharged. For those SentMachs with the colony ships, that recharge would be given to them by the ship they were on, which in turn gathered energy with solar panels.

On the planet Earth, there was no Sun to give the energy needed for the SentMachs to live, the sky having long been turned black by the fires of industry. As power reserves ran low, and SentMachs were forced to deactivate due to a lack of energy, the main workforce on old Earth began to fear for their existence. What soon followed was a war fought for survival, as both organics and SentMachs needed the precious little power to survive. For the organics, it was to power the artificially lit farms that served to feed the struggling populace. The SentMach simply needed the power to continue operating,

The worst of the fighting was quick and bloody, but it still has not fully ended. Every inhabitant of planet Earth is in a desperate struggle for survival, SentMach and human alike have formed small communities that desperately try and scrape together the power their bodies demand.

You have just awoken in this world.


#12

Holy crap! That sounds fantastic!


#13

That was a really interesting demo. I decided to play as a rather obedient/pragmatic robot, and was happy with the amount of choices.

There is one small detail that I should mention though. The theoretical max carrying capacity of earth is only about 10-15 billion. That means it would probably only take about 2% of one trillion to bring about the sort of overpopulation crisis you want. Even a mere 3-4% of one trillion would probably be overkill.

Aside from that, the plot sounds great!


#14

Don’t have much to say in the way of a review with the length of it being what it is, but I think it’s definitely a good start, love the sounds of the setting :slight_smile: I played in a way where I wasn’t anti-human or pro bot, but more interested in self-preservation so I’m quite interested to see where you take it


#15

It has potential and I will be waiting for updates


#16

I sense potential in this one.


#17

Do this right and it has potential. Honestly I didn’t like the demo because it seemed sloppy with the “whoops, not done yet.” I think it would have been better to at least get a “chapter” or “section” done, then just say the next is underway.


#18

I played Choice of Robots earlier today, and the idea of playing as a robot sounds even cooler. I’d love to see more of this.


#19

Hello there again me boyo, I’ll be perfectly frank with this one. While I do rather like the concept of this myself, hence the effort to do something with it, it is currently on the back burner while I work on MoE.


#20

I can’t help but feel bad for future humans because this is likely to happen if we don’t expand throughout the stars. I’m loving the concept either way. Good luck with the story :smile: