Just to clarify, even people that are not (always) female can be okay with the use of female gendered language. That can depend on the person. (Just don’t assume they are okay with it) (and it’s also lot more common around nonbinary people as it is for binary trans people)
Just mentioning that here…
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Haha that’s exactly the problem, just no one related to me is aware of that yet (sorry mom, but you’re gonna be in for one hell of a surprise)
Lucky 
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True, however as a gay man I am not an indeed prince catling seems to prefer masculine pronouns too and it’s a shame his relatives don’t seem to respect that. I would certainly be very uncomfortable if someone called me a bride and due to the history of the struggle for gay rights deeply insulted if called a queen.
Since feminizing gay men has long been an anti gay strategy I’m deeply uncomfortable with female gendered language being directed at me.
Well Laguz has pretty much sold me on they, their and theirs for non binary individuals, unless they specifically request different.
Well I’d like a better, longer lasting relationship again sometime, but cute slightly kinky guys who happen to be into me don’t exactly seem to grow on trees. 
From what I talked about with @ashestoashes018 yesterday, I’ve gotta ask how do you stand most women’s fashion it just seems so frilly, silly and horribly impractical (considering I learned yesterday that most contemporary women’s clothing doesn’t even have pockets big enough to accommodate a modern phone, or indeed any pockets at all).
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Regarding the whole LGBT birds of a together thing, I’m another person that doesn’t have really have an non-LGBT friends. Almost all my actual friends (including both my girlfriends) are trans, with one exception being the gay guy that comes with us. The only cis het people I deal with on a regular base are my family and the rest of the Choice of Games team.
It’s actually pretty common. I know one of my girlfriends doesn’t really ever deal with cis people unless she knew them before her transition.
My comment was a general clarification, because yes, a non-female person can call themself a bride and thus be a bride. It was meant educational and not to trivialise how other people can feel about people using wrongly gendered language for them. I’m sorry if that comment can be read that way.
That princecatling prefers to not use female gendered language got clear alone from his wording.
That’s pronouns, that’s only one aspect of gender neutral/gendered language. Some people hate to be adressed by gendered honorifics or pronouns, but are totally fine with being called boyfriend/girlfriend by their partners, others only accept genderneutral words like datemate/enbyfriend etc. It can vary hugely between nonbinary/trans people what kind of gendered language makes them uncomfortable or even dysphoric.
But you are right that it’s certainly better to use neutral pronouns until told otherwise. That’s exactly what I mean with “just don’t assume with what kind of gendered language a person is okay with.”
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Beauty Is Pain. Also, I’m convinced that women’s clothing suppliers and purse manufacturers are in cahoots to make sure women keep having to buy bigger bags to accommodate phones that won’t fit into tiny or nonexistent pockets. Personally I like a lot of women’s fashion (I’m very successful with hiding the fact that I’m trans from my family that way) but fake pockets are the bane of my existence, possibly even more so than no pockets at all
Though these days with the diy trends and all its not hard to find tutorials on how to just create your own pockets or lengthen preexisting ones. I’ve also found premade pockets on amazon
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I still entirely intend to pick up sewing again just for pockets.
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I honestly have no idea, but judging by my parents’ attitudes, and the PRC’s general “marginalised groups don’t exist” policy, I doubt the situation’s particularly good.
My parents and extended family have alternated between “you have to respect people’s relationships even if you don’t understand them” and “gay people exist…but we can’t accept that [kind of thing here]”. The former was my mother quoting/agreeing with a Chinese news show or something, and the latter was my aunt and my mother agreeing with her. On the other hand, my ~12 year old cousin knows what gay people are and didn’t appear to condemn the idea, so who knows?
(My parents have lived in America for a decade and a half, though, while my other family hasn’t, so that could be a contributing factor)
How do you engage with that? When your parent or family says things or alludes to being homophobic or thinking women aren’t equal? I’m honestly at a place where I don’t know how to correct that notion, and I’ve been trying for like a year now. (Before that I just went "oh it’s old fashioned and that’s just that generation.)
bruh, it so is. That doesn’t mean I don’t like it on occasion, but I swear that the majority of women’s fashion is for two reasons: 1 - to emphasize certain assets, and 2, to push the pricy handbag market. A solid quality purse is no cheaper than USD$30, I swear.
My mom’s side of the family is more liberal than I am – nearly communist/socialist – while my dad’s side is very conservative - many of them actively sought out Donald Trump. I’m not sure if they think he’s the Second Coming, or what. Anyway, I actively hide that I’m LGBT (though I’m not even 100% sure what I’d categorize myself as; though I’ve made no secret of it on these forums, I’m definitely not out IRL – especially because I’m not sure what I am) from my family, though I’ve had mild discussions with my mom.
My dad has gotten a lot better in recent years, though he’s still pretty 60’s about how he views women. He wants me to get married so that I’ll have a husband to support me, but idk. Oh – that reminds me. In high school, he was convinced I was a lesbian, because I wouldn’t date (he didn’t let me hang out with boys, so, idk), and he didn’t threaten to kick me out over it, so, you know, that’s pretty awesome for a dude who voted Trump. But that’s getting off-track.
My dad’s entire family is very religious – but not in the good way. They’re the type of religious that used to tell me not to speak to the Muslim children at school, because one day they’d try to bomb me for being from a Christian family (this was my grandmother on my dad’s side, as well as a now-deceased aunt. I do not follow these views, nor does my dad, himself).
I’ve attempted to start conversations with this family, but I’m regularly told that I’m being impudent and that children should be seen, not heard (I’m 22). Got told by my grandmother that I was going to be the reason she has a heart attack and dies, because I gave her a bunch of fully verifiable facts that she “disagreed” with, and I was giving her “undue” stress.
Idk. If people are going to change, it’s going to be out of love. If they don’t change, it’s because they’re terrible people, like my evil grandmother 
(i don’t talk to her anymore, thank god )
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Depends on how confident you are that you won’t get kicked out, your emotional tolerance for argument/getting yelled at, and similar factors. I just tune it out, because my chance of changing my family’s mind is very low compared to the chance of getting yelled at.
It depends on your family member.
My brother, for whatever reason, really believed that girls and women could not drive and he insisted on driving, even my car anytime we went somewhere. No matter what was said or done, he’d not change his mind or acknowledge anything different, so I just accepted him as he was and showed him I loved him despite him being wrong on that.
I haven’t heard of someone doing that except from my friend in Saudi Arabia, though I’ve heard that opinion voiced a lot, but seriously with my driving record anyone drives better than me
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TBH I used to hold that view(wrong I know, But I used to be very different, especially with my different personalities and all 
)think that view is due to several factors, most motoring media be it tv shows or car magazines are mostly presented/written by men and male orientated and think it’s kinda seen as key for male identity. Same sort of reasons women who play sports, especially more male ones like rugby are often seen as butch, lesbians etc or for men who are vegetarians/vegans that this makes them more feminine. Plus you know peers/peer pressure and all, I’ve read a few times that you are the product of your 7 closest friends, not sure how true that is though .
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I sincerely hope I’m not the product of my 7 closest friends otherwise I’m a total mess. Especially considering I don’t know them anymore
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I probably have an advantage there in the sense that my parents (especially my dad and I) have a long history of discussing politics, so I’m not talked down to or dismissed, especially when it comes to politics in the West. It probably also helps that neither of my parents were ever really conservative. My dad’s a little more culturally conservative and my mom’s a little bit more economically conservative, but both grew up in relatively forward-thinking, intellectual households (though the rest of my mother’s family has more or less lost that status, thanks to a rather lengthy stint of being named enemies of the state during the Cultural Revolution). They weren’t that far off from western “neoliberal” norms when we arrived, and they haven’t shifted rightwards since. Their objections tend to be more curiously sceptical in tone than outright hostile.
Generally speaking, I try to fill in context that they might not have, usually by using analogies to situations and cultural biases which they themselves have experienced or are familiar with. They might not have approved of the whole idea of Muslims taking prayer breaks at work, but it became a lot easier to articulate the racial and religious biases which made that sort of thing seem “wrong” to them when I compared it to Christian religious holidays like Easter, where members of another “strange foreign religion” also get time off work.
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I’m going to be honest as a “member” of the lgbt community and say that I feel zero connection to said community beyond the fact that I happen to like both men and women. Part of the reason for that is that there isn’t really much of a community presence where I live and thus worked out my identity without any such influence. My sexuality is important to me, yes, but only because of the problems coming out would have in my family life. So I really dislike people who act like something as trivial as what people bits one likes is an indicator for how they think, what their views are, and what sort of goals they have. We’re a loose group of sexualities, not a family.
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The problem is that the lgbtq community is just like any other community. They are extremely diverse and filled with people of various faiths, sexes, ethnicities and beliefs and filled with bad eggs.
People are just so different; sexuality wont always be a unifying factor.
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You know, maybe this is a little bit unrelated but sometimes I forget how exceptional is the CoG community about ideas of inclusivity and lgbt representation.
I mean, today I was talking with a group of people and the conversation deviated a little bit to movies, and some things like the inclusion of gay characters in Disney, in things like Frozen or Beauty and the Beast. And some guys seemed pretty upset about that, and I tried to have a nice discussion about it (like hey, “What’s so wrong about it?” “Isn’t it nice that they are starting to be more inclusive in family-friendly media?”).
And then I had to heard some shit about “SJWs” and “Political correctness” and “shoving down our throaths”…and… I can’t, I really hate dealing with all that, I just sometimes find surprising that some people talk like that even outside the internet. I didn’t get particular offended but of course, as a gay guy, I can’t say that I found the conversation pleasant.
Maybe it is because of the media that I’m more used to consume recently, but things like this sometimes make me realize how rare is found places like CoG, that actually try to create a nice enviroment helps creating discussions like this, so thank you forum members, I just really wanted to say that.
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