This is the link to my game which has been in development very very early stages the only really deep story is the zeus way whilst other paths are shorter feedback welcome and if you have a great idea for a short story in it e.g. a monster bit or battle i will take suggestions
I am Greek thats and this game will go through me first and then anybody else.
Because if I find anything less than perfectly accurate I will hunt you down!(Figuratively)
Cannons? 1 strike
Try catapults at least!
it has a lot of grammatical errors and can be confusing at times but it has potential.
P.S. if you need help like ideas or to find errors and stuff you could pm @Vendetta or people like that and they might help you
Hades is gonna kick your ass because you forgot him!The forgotten is the strongest one!
Hoplite the Greek soldiers are called hoplites…No 1400bc no we did not have hoplites…And I don’t think the word used back then can translate to anything meaningful in your language.Ψιλοι=Soldiers/Talls Guys
Use more diversity in Greek names!
Godpower? Change it to traits-powers and I make small list of them if you want according to our 13 main gods and their powers
Godstrength? Its a given demi-god fact to a percent to have abnormal strength! In our culture that is.
Godblood? What? How pure of a god we are? In Greek gods it doesn’t work like that.Change it to measure how epic the individual is that is more like our gods.
Vanity problems you see.“Only the most bad ass guys may become gods you see!”
Example Hercules! He went through hell to become god no matter his bloodline!
really Hercules that guy was a wimp compared to Diomedes
I mean Diomedes beat the crap out of like 2 god (Ares and Aphrodite)
I agree with @Player on most things, but i would also like to see powers that are unique to each god. For example, if you were a child of Hades you could raise, some spirits to help you out, Poseidon could have boosted stats when in water, and Zeus could imbue his weapons with electricity.
why are there rifles here?
There are a few spelling errors on almost every page.
Rifles strike 2
Diomedes didn’t go to the underworld like Hercules who for some unexplained reason everyone sends him to the underworld like his going for shopping!
still Diomedes did beat the shit out of god and I might be wrong but unlike hercules i don’t believe he was a demigod was he?
Even though I played a female character, people always refer to her as male.
Okay, first impressions. The grammar needs work, as it is the game is coming off as unprofessional and the reading is tedious, especially the dialogue. Also in regards to grammar, pick a perspective, is it third person omniscient or second person? Since second person is arguably the only compatible perspective for choose your own adventure games save for establishing pages, the scene where we find out what the king’s doing is just odd. Also, “he” is not changed to “she” after gender is selected. One last nitpick before getting to story, having the Choicescript tutorial “what kind of animal will you be” once your content runs comes of as a bit slapshod. Now onto story.
There are a lot of holes in the story, way too many questions are raised. Here’s every question that went through my mind for the assassin storyline alone, not including the ones about the accuracy of the mythology, just to get across how many holes there are:
Why are the assassins obligated to work for the king? Why do the assassins only work for “good”, and what do they interpret “good” as? Why does this random assassin have a mystical book that can transport people to Mount Olympus? We’re told the king is ‘evil’, give examples. If the protagonist is being trained to work for the assassins, why do we see nothing indicating so? Why exactly do some want to kill the prophecy children? How do the characters know the king set a bounty on the protagonist? Is it a seperate assassin’s guild that is after you or members of the same one that raised you? Why is killing a monster the only way to get money for food?
As for gameplay, the stats seem a bit too broad, and the ones regarding the ship should probably stay hidden until the protagonist actually get a ship. Minor nitpick, but addind the word “god” in front of most of them seems a bit silly.
I don’t mean to seem malicious, I criticize because I see potential and want to help you improve.
This Game = Heavily Influenced By Percy Jackson.
Correct me if i’m wrong, it just feels like it.
@blackstar786 playing through it now and you could tell us what certain things are. im also curious as to whether the Percy Jackson and the Olympians was the inspiration for this.
@blackstar786 the ending confused me, it had no apparent connection to the story. you should make it flow better. and write the cyclops scene. on a different note, i want to play this. seems very fun.
Too many errors to cont and the entire game went a little fast. And if I was the assassins why did the assassins come after me? it said that posidon ( probobly spelled wrong) was teaching me how to fight instead of haties again probobly spelled wrong.
When I picked jades to train me in combat …someone else trained me