Well this is turning out rather interesting, and I hope I shall solve the mystery of the crazy elder lady. Considering @Lucid has a claim over the ‘Life of’ titles (granted I’m not sure whether that can be contested) perhaps a title change would be good as soon as possible. I know somebody already has the title ‘Invaders’ in use, so how about ‘Sent to Examine’ or simply title it based on the alien race, or even ‘Walking Among Earthlings.’ I am curious about a few things, will the RO’s be generic and boring individuals who want a typical relationship or are we going to get someone interesting who would be willing to help in stealing government secrets and/or causing harm to the human race? Could building up the skills leading to having some greater power? Like telekinesis or metacognition for intelligence, mind control for charisma etc.?
I’m going with luck as my primary stat. I figure that more goofy and ridiculous stuff will happen this way.
Accidentally killed an old woman
This game made me laugh
I’m not going to lie but I got really confused of why that old lady just chased me down… but then again, you would do the same thing if you see a alien.
Honestly, it’s very FAST. There’s no real story to it thus far and even the MC complains about lack of information. Remember, you’re writing a book-game, not a game. Readers like back story, don’t just be all; You are this person, this is what is happening, CHOICE, this happened! CHOICE, Something else happened,CHOICE… you get the idea. Tell a story, make it interesting. I started it and when it ended 4 minutes later I thought; "Well. That was a thing. What else is new in WIP? " and backed out. I wasn’t even gonna say anything, I wasn’t invested in the story at all. Perhaps a prologue about how the MC was picked for the mission where you can insert the name and gender choices as well as backstory on the race beyond “lizardmen”… I dunno. This was just my impression. It was abrupt, is the best way I can put it. edit Oh but I am so glad to see that on a first read, there were no grammatical mistakes, that I noticed, at any rate.
Alright, I’ll think of a new title to use soon.
I really like your suggestion of ‘Walking Among Earthlings’, so I may well use that. I definitely intend to incorporate the ROs within the story, and with the right paths taken or attribute use, a couple of them certainly can betray humanity and help you on your mission. Also, you’re spot on with having the attributes eventually lead to having some greater power. I’ll probably make the use of them be available if you have 8 or higher in the attribute.
That’s a great idea. I think what I’ll do is a have a sort of prologue, where you’re back on your home planet, and you go through a series of tests to determine your stats. Each test could have 4 options, and each one would correspond to a boost in the respective stat.
I really appreciate your criticisms. I agree that I definitely focused too much on the ‘game’ aspect of it over the story. I ended up spending far too much time on having as many options and routes as possible, and not enough on actually developing the story in-between. That’s why it’s 7500 words but only took you a few minutes to read through. I like the idea of having a prologue, would give me a good opportunity to give more backstory and flesh it out.
Don’t worry, that will make a lot more sense later!
Thank you! I certainly intend to stick with this, I’ve already started work on a prologue and the next chapter.
This is more of what I envisioned…
That looks way too human for me…
Just posting to say I like the new title . Simple, but nice. But also I’m wondering since we’re a lizard person, if in this reality people who subscribe to the lizard people conspiracy theory exist? If so I can see how you could use that in several ways, like accusing the president/politicians/royal family/celebrities etc of being the real lizard people .
Ohhhh i love this game
Great, glad you like it!
That’s actually a very interesting idea. I hadn’t thought of the possibility of involving lizard conspiracy theorists, but now that you’ve mentioned the possibilities, it seems like it’d be a waste to not use them at all.
I like this can we romance a alien as well that would be cool and can one of the overlord e our father or mother
Possibly. I’ll have to see about that one
You’ll find out a lot more about that in the prologue chapter, where you live through your childhood on your home planet, while basically customising the stats of your character along the way.
I’ll probably release that in the next update, in around a week.
This definitely has potential.
Added a prologue chapter. Total word count is 14,800.
Merged original first 2 chapters into one.
Added a relationship system.
I had a lot of fun with the prologue chapter, let me know your opinion on the backstory and if you like slowly picking attributes over your life. Once again, I’d really appreciate it if you could leave any feedback or criticisms you have. Thank you!
Gotta Check this out soon. I’m hoping for at least one human RO who is moody and won’t mind betraying their species and an antagonist I can enjoy taking down.
“It’s time to destroy humanity. I think I’ll start with you!”
“First you’ll have to deal with my… Guards!”
is this still being worked on?
This reminds me a little of Invader Zim…anyone else watched that or just me?
Just you. You are the only one.