I like the complex character creation (careful about getting caught up in it though-- this is a massive project). Some more hints about the different breeds’ stats would be nice though-- you’re giving me a lot of information to process there. Also some hints of how the stats work–I can usually assume a strength stat in a human-based game will help me win a tavern brawl, but animals can be a little different, and at this point I’m not sure what kinds of situations my pup will need to be equipped for.
While I doubt my dog would react differently during the escape scene before you go to the shelter, having a choice there to escape (even if it amounts to you being caught by the owners and taken back inside) would be nice.
Also, “you feel tears weeping out of your eyes”-- dogs do not shed tears. They express sadness, but they do not cry. (Technically, “weeping” is misused in this case as well, I believe. It should be “Seeping” or “you weep” not “your tears weep”)
Things you should work on:
I know this is long but you should work on form now, so you have less editing to do down the line.
Watch your paragraph spacing. There should be a line break between every paragraph or it’s painful to read (unless I’m critiquing, I never read paragraphs mis-formatted like this, simple error though it is). You also missed an “h” in the Mini Dac(h)shund choice.
Your voice is cute for the narrative (I find myself charmed in the opening), but needs polished. Pay attention to redundancy in your writing, and watch out for run-ons or super lengthy sentences. For instance:
Every night, when the outside light that Mother calls Sunlight disappears in favor of darkness, which Mother calls nighttime, she herds you and your littermates into bed and tells you a story.
You’re tripping over yourself here with those asides (also, you use commas for the “which Mother calls nighttime” segment, but not the “that mother calls sunlight” segment, which is structurally inconsistent. Also, also you should either capitalize Nighttime or drop the capital in sunlight). The sentence makes the reader pause and need to interpret things–removing them from the story. Putting things in parenthesis usually helps with that (em dashes too, but not with so many in a single sentence.
“No! No they aren’t! I just heard the humans that have been taking care of us, their going to take you away!” You can see the whites of her eyes even in the darkness and you bolt up onto your paws. You’ve never seen her frightened, let alone panicked. “Their going to take you to the Shelter!”
You used their in place of “they’re” twice in this section. You also have to put a comma in "even in the darkness , and you bold up onto your paws. Any time the two segments can be their own sentence, put a comma (you do this a few times in the narrative).
Also the way the mother uses the phrase “the humans that have been taking care of us,” it feels like she expects her stay to be temporary. Dogs do form attachments to their owners, and she’s not being dog-sat, fostered, or put up for adoption as far as I can tell. And she can understand human speech–so she probably would recognize their names, or at least identify them as “My humans.”
On Mother’s description of the Shelter: Common style is to use three periods for ellipses (…). More can be used for drama/humor as a punchline but shouldn’t be used often (frankly I think it’s goofy looking regardless. But I’m a curmudgeon and that’s entirely stylistic). I feel like you could cut down on the use altogether in this scene (break up some of the dialogue with “blah,” she paused to take a breath, “blah.” or cut them out.
And don’t use ampersands as shorthand in novel-length writing–it’s fine for texting, abbreviations, and casual speech–things where you’re short on space or time. But you’ve got all the space you need, and all the time you need to write a novel here, so you don’t need to “condense”. Therefore it’s bad form and comes across as awkward and sloppy-- especially when used inconsistently.
Lastly, “O.K.” is an abbreviation–technically for “All correct”. It should be capitalized as you spell it. “Okay” is the word spelled out, which allows you to forgo capitalization.
I always wonder if I come off as harsh with this stuff–if so, I don’t mean to, I just think it’s better to correct early on. This game seems like it’ll be a fun go if you stick with it, so good luck to you ^^