Good to see you again @aequa 
Don’t worry, if any of us found it we most likely going to tell you 
Anyway, I still not goes through all of it yet, but I actually like the beginning more than the previous one, not sure about others though.
There also two thing I noticed:
I like the game and im looking forward to new updates, and why did you put “I hope no one hates it more now”? Im guessing people dont really like it?
(Well to be fair, i dont read the replies in most post)
LOL, everyone’s actually been really super nice to me on here! I’m just hella insecure and I like to complain. :')
How Lilith is conveyed in this is handled far better than the previous versions though it’s rushed, just as before.
She really comes off as a bad, manipulative person and I love it. But almost immediately after, she’s had a sudden change of heart.
The previous updates had at least some interaction with her that, though a bit forced, could understandably lead to the U-turn she took in terms of how she acted towards the MC.
The MC acts more like an impetuous, stereotypical, rebellious teen than a confused amnesiac with no recollection of who they are. Granted, they only lost their memories of the spirits, people and anything exposition-worthy.
Rewrite it as much as you need to to feel satisfied. As long as you’re content with the final product, it’ll prolly be fine. 
Ooooh, I have a lot to fix for today then! Thank you. 
Agreed, just keep doing you! Nothing comes out perfect the first time (unless you’re one lucky duck) so tweak it and twerk it as much as you need.
I’m also an insecure conplainer, sometimes whining a bit makes you feel better and gets those emotions out, so I’m with you there. I haven’t replayed it yet but i definitely will, but i enjoyed your precious rewrites all the same. I don’t think I’ll be disappointed or “hate it” any time soon 
Thou protest too much about yourself.
It’s one thing to realize that your work can always be improved in some way, shape, or form, and it’s another thing to be constantly self-deprecating yourself.
Everyone’s super nice to you here because we like your work, and for me personally, you kinda sorta remind me of OdicHastings, writing-style-wise–who doesn’t like dry humor?-- and while it’s okay to seek self-improvement, you oughta just learn to pat yourself on the back every once in a while.
It’ll feel good, man. Trust me.
we can’t have that. Joking joking, I feel that if I don’t write this part…I will be sent to cog jail.
alright let me fix that up for you!
I am now even more conflicted of my emotions. My MC is very emotional as I am with myself.
The story and it’s pace are way more polished now, good job!
Though I’ll miss little snippets about lion cub in the beginning of each chapter. They added greatly to the mysterious atmosphere.
Your response made me think a lot. I hope no one thinks I actually hate myself. I overexaggerate a lot! I honestly don’t take myself seriously enough to see it as self-deprication. I doubt my work and am definitely insecure with my skills in a lot of things, but I see all of it as part of a learning experience. This game is just something I’m not happy with, and that’s fine. I’ll continue to work on it and I’ll try to stop talking about how much I hate everything lmao. Thank you so much. 
Thank you! :^)
Thank you! I forgot I even did that. I didn’t think they added anything. I saved them in case I ever wanted to add them back in again though, so I’ll think about it! :^)
Also
I never updated yesterday. Was thinking about never updating again! (Was taking it too seriously.) I don’t know when I’ll update again. I’m too invested to not finish it. It definitely won’t be left behind. I just want to think for a sec. There might be a little break so don’t worry if I… vanish. Whoosh.
Thanks for being nice to me. Idk if anything in this post made any sense but that’s cool ig.
in the aaaaaaaarms oooooof an angeeeeeel
That’s a shame, I really liked your story. It seemed well-thought out.
I would say don’t force yourself to finish. It’ll take all the fun out of writing it in the first place.
I’m definitely not forcing myself to! I’m just a perfectionist and there’s a lot I want to do with this story yet. I think the way the plot eventually unfolds is worth me continuously editing until I’m content. I’ve spent wayyy too much time on it to even consider stopping. I’ll take a few days to think and the rest of the time will be spent on making Curse of the Spirit how I envisioned it when I first started writing. I couldn’t imagine just leaving this behind, lol. If it wasn’t fun to write, I would have deleted it at Chapter 1.
Hmm, Lilith 2.0 comes across a lot more vicious than Lilith 1.0
Presuming Lilith will ask for a virtue spirit, we ought to ask what harm giving her an extra virtue spirit would do. An “Okay, you think she is lying, what would be her angle then?”
would it be better if you flesh out more limited time in the school? (I am a bad explainer 
) what about making the whole losing our memory happen on a Monday and the flight to go home will be Friday night for that same week? that way you could take your time to flesh out the characters and do a little bit of world building. plus you could show how the school works(from a student perspective) and make the MC react to his duties.
Lol, Lilith 2.0. I did this on purpose and idk if I like it or not. Uhhh I fleshed out Lilith’s backstory a lot more in Chapter 6 and it kind of explains it. I’ll definitely rework things with her, from personality to backstory and interactions.
Yeyeye I totally get what you mean. My thought process was mostly about MC’s mother and what she would be thinking. I always figured I would explain everything else by the time MC returns, but it would probably make more sense to have the reader experience that in the beginning.
But at the same time, I felt there was a lot of information being dumped onto the reader about Spirits and I didn’t want it to be too much. I don’t know. I like the idea of adding at least a little more time with the others before leaving. That way, I could explore the Divine’s influence around the school and how that might work… And to also show that the amnesia doesn’t only affect specific things. I’d like to show that it also affects concentration, how MC learns, and other emotional factors. I think the only place I sort of had this was at the end of Chapter… 3?
you can try a make it that when we go to our classes the professors give us a little summary or recap of the material. that way it will not feel forced, of course, you will need a way to “dumb down” the information(good luck).
i’m only excited that this is the 200th post because i get to have it lol i win
Hello.
I made changes. Here are the changes. That I made. By changing them.
Chapter 5 is up
It is a lot different than the previous version. Ahhhhhhhhhh. There are a lot more interactions with Lilith, and I don’t know if it’s too focused on her or not. She’s important but I don’t know if she’ll be that important. Um. I’ve very loosely planned the rest of the game honestly.
The Lilith interaction in Chapter 4
is less “i h8 u” to “lol hav my babis”
I don’t remember what else I changed. I made tiny adjustments here and there randomly. The new Chapter 5 is the most I’ve ever written in a chapter. Um. I colored the drawing of Theta on my tumblr.
i seriously blank when I make update posts lol bye
