The Witching Hour -- Romantic Fantasy Mystery... thingy? WIP


#1

Hello, I’m Parade! I’ve been a lurker for over a year, and have just now begun working on my very own game book! I’ve been really inspired by a lot of the WIP’s on this site, so I decided to try my own hand at this whole writing business :slight_smile:

My game is called The Witching Hour, and like the titles says, is a, uh… romantic fantasy mystery… thingy. The story centers on you, a young witch or warlock, who has been banished to your grandmother’s house. Your grandmother lives in a town called Cedar Creek which is home to a small but thriving magical community. You are invited to join a small coven, which is made up of three (sometimes four) unique and interesting characters. However, it isn’t long before trouble finds you in Cedar Creek: a teacher at your new school is found dead, and many believe it is by magical means. Is the death simply coincidence, or is your past catching up to you?

DUN DUN DUN! Haha, anyways, the game is just a teeny tiny intro right now. I’m sort of just telling you guys it exists, haha. The game has fantasy and mystery elements, but I’m gonna be honest with you-- it’s mostly a romance game. While I will certainly include the personal questions and personality stats that COG games do so well, I’m planning on taking an otome approach to the game. Certain key questions will take you down separate routes with a character. I’m also trying to implement character sheets within game that change depending on what you learn about the character. Not sure how that’s going to pander out yet, but I really want it to work!

Now for some questions… I have pictures for the game, but they don’t show up through dropbox? They work fine when I play the game on my own computer, but not so over the internet. Is it because the compiling method doesn’t put them through, or…? Also, I have two options for character creation. The first involves a flashback scene to your apprenticeship. Part of the scene shows up in the demo. It’ll give a more narrative approach to dividing your magical abilities, and it will also give some extra world building. HOWEVER! It feels sort of awkward to flash back to such a long scene so early in the game. Should I take a more simple approach and place the world building in other places?

Haha, I’ll stop rambling. Here’s the demo: https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/s/wniknthb7wrbvzn/The%20Witching%20Hour%20(1).html


Which WIP would you bring back from the dead?
#2

I deal with world building by showing it only when I need to. I do that to avoid info dumps that would slow things down. So instead, for example, writing a few hundred words about dragon behavior, I wait for an actual dragon encounter and then use the show, don’t tell method to write about dragon behavior without it being an info dump and slowing down the story.

I don’t have time now, but I’ll read through your gamebook and tell you what I think.

EDIT: There isn’t enough for me to tell you what I think yet. I’m going to wait for the next update.


#3

This looks interesting! I like your writing style.

I ran into an error: startup line 119: bad label cupboard scene


#4

Ran into the same problem as @fiogan but I am very intrigued by the game. Keep it up.


#5

Oh, sorry guys. I forgot to save before I sent it out, haha. https://dl.dropbox.com/s/wniknthb7wrbvzn/The%20Witching%20Hour%20(1).html That’s basically all I have for now, anyways. Like I said, just letting you know this is happening.

@DSeg I usually do it like that, too. I was just worried using a flashback would be jarring.

@Fiogan Thank you! I fixed it.

@shirette Thank you, too!


#6

Consider me intrigued. I found a few typos, but that’s to be expected. :slight_smile:
“There seems to be an antique store on ever corner.” ever - every
“Your granmda lives a ways out of town, though.” granmda - grandma, ways - way
I’m gonna be keeping a close eye on this. :3 Good luck with this~ cx


#7

I like it so far!


#8

This seems interesting! I’ll be keeping an eye on it, for sure. :slight_smile:


#9

@Lola089 Thank you so much! I’m terrible at editing my own writing, so I really appreciate this. I fixed them, so it should be fine now :slight_smile:

@Doctor Thank you!

@Ossifer Thanks. I’m writing right now, so the next update shouldn’t be for very long.


#10

This seem good so far, and you definitely pique my interest when you said you’ll be taking an otome approach with this. I can’t wait to see how everything turns out :slight_smile:


#11

I’m a sucker for romance games so I’m very excited for this. I enjoyed what you have so far!


#12

Me too @attolia. This medium of novel/game lends itself to such creativity. While reading this I can picture everything. I CAN’T wait to start a romance


#13

Hey I swear when I played yesterday there was more, the interaction with the grandmother. What happened???


#14

@gigglezz Thanks! I’m still unsure how the otome thing is going to pander out. I’ve got it planned though, so idk? Haha.

@attolia I am too! I’m just a sucker for romance. I was reading romance novels in elementary school.

@shirette Thanks, again! Yeah, I realized that the flashback needed to be pushed back further. It’ll show up later in the game. For now, I decided to simply go on with what’s happening at Cedar Creek.

Since the profile pictures aren’t working, do you guys want me to post them right here? It’ll be like a, uh… preview of what sort of characters you’ll meet. Also I’m planning on updating on Friday, so there’s that.


#15

That would be so swell!


#16

@RedRoses Haha, okay! Here is the line up!

http://oi58.tinypic.com/aa7pr9.jpg

From left to right: Tara Hunt, Mia Pekkanen, Jamie Linderman, and Ian Slater.

That picture is SUPPOSED to be the header of the stat page, but alas. If anyone wants to know anything about a particular character, just ask :slight_smile:


#17

Whatever you got plan, I’m sure it’ll be great. As for the profile pics I’m in favor of them being posted. It’ll be nice to get a sneak peak of the other characters. :slight_smile:


#18

Oh you already posted, thanks!


#19

They look great!


#20

@parade, I like how you draw clothes!