The Liminal Academy (WIP)

I have a question!

we start to choose between 4 elemant right? do we get to learn more later on , or are we stuck with just one ?

Ohhh do we get a wand a La Harry Potter ?

Is this gonna be like harry potter ? I hope not…cose I didnt like harry potter…

ok…so maybe more then one question , sorry :sweat_smile:

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gasps


@Morgan_R is magic purely elemental?

Does the word Liminal have anything to do with the mind or subconscious?

That was a quite captivating demo for me, so kudos on that :wink:

One thing I'd like to suggest

@Johann: Good to know, thanks!

@E_RedMark: You will definitely be learning more elemental magic, although the one you chose will be stronger. I’m undecided on wands, but you’ll get to choose a familiar. And I guess it’s a little bit like Harry Potter, just by virtue of being a magic school game, but I’m going to try to make it different. I definitely don’t want it to read like Harry Potter fanfic.

@Baam: Magic is many things. Elemental magic is relatively straightforward, which may be why many young mages acquire a degree of elemental control first.

@zenith8: Not in this case.

@KJM: Thanks! I think I may go back to that conversational thread and provide some additional options for a response. I really want all the conversations to feel like conversations, and not just working your way through a dialogue tree. Responding to Ash’s rudeness, and potentially withdrawing from the conversation, seems like it should be possible. Thanks for pointing that out!

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So wat are you planning to have in this update

@Morgan_R That’s it?! Dammit!

Yeah, looking forward to more. Are you planning on adding personality sliders, because there seem to be trait-based decisions included.

Good to know , though I be happy with using your hands to do magic . Most old magic was done that way…its more sithy…too lol

Ohh familiar!! SPIDER!!! :hugs:

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There’s charm in both ways. Hands on approach is more primal (never forget fireball duels in Skyrim), but one should not overlook the notion of famous Obi-Wan’s quote regarding - I believe - wands: “An elegant weapon… for a more civilized age” :wink:

can we have a fox familiar?

Very cool. I’ll be keeping an eye on this WIP.

bah! Obi-wan just didn’t wanna lose his glowy stick! lol

I was thinking of the traditional mage actually from D&D where you just throw spells and…remember in baldur’s gate ? it was beautiful to use magic…that way . :relaxed:

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Well done.

I’m very intrigued by the world building. You’ve established that there is a Known World, implying there is also and unknown/uncharted world. You establish that Shadowtown (and Aeolia, by extension) are relatively more to the north than other possible settings just by describing the citizens as pale in comparison to the Southerners and the Islanders. You make it clear that Shadowtown is not just literally in the shadow of Aeolia, but also figuratively too by explaining through the well-dressed boy that Aeolians are financially better off than Shadowtowners. You show that Shadowtown and Aeolia are connected not just due to geographical position, but also through the academy. Additionally, you tease curious players by implying that there is perhaps a third city also connected to the academy, leaving the reader to wonder if that city is under Shadowtown, over Aeolia, or in a separate location all together.

As for the characters, I did find them pretty interesting, especially the blind girl and the boy in white. Their personalities haven’t really been fleshed out beyond how they would treat a complete stranger, but even that is telling in each of their cases.

Flame-Haired Girl

Ash seems like a no-nonsense, confrontational, and perhaps even temperamental type of person. Her name, her hair, and her personality all hint at her affinity to fire even before she shows you. I have mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, this makes it easier for the player to understand who she is quickly and being able to easily remember her. On the other hand, some cynical readers may only see her as her archetype (the fire character) rather than see her as her own character.

A suggestion/idea I have for this is to perhaps eventually reveal that her name isn’t actually Ash, and that she changed it herself both as a means to keep a low profile and to reflect her abilities.

Blind Girl

Alina comes off as a kind, good-humored character that is open with her emotions. She doesn’t seem to mind being blind, partially due to being used to it and having developed measures to mitigate her disadvantages, and partially due to the fact that she can see magic, her most intriguing quality. I look forward to see how she uses her abilities in the future.

Well-Dressed Boy

In comparison to the other characters, I have trouble immediately telling what Richard’s personality is. He is well mannered, likely due to his upbringing, but he is also brusque and to the point. The most obvious thing I can tell is that he seems to be the most determined of the characters you meet, seeing as he threw away his old life and his relationship with his family to pursue the study of magic. This is reflected in his abilities as well. He is potentially the most able when it comes to magic, having been able to dabble in all four of the elements. Beyond that, we can only wait for further appearances with him before we can better understand his personality.

White-clad Boy

Rook’s personality evokes the calmness that would be expected of a mortician. He reflects the attitude that death is a natural part of life and is not bothered by it. His abilities as a necromancer play into this theme. He seems to reflect a wisdom beyond his years, though we have yet to see whether or not that is actually true.

All in all, he reminds me of the Grave Cleric in D&D. I’ve always considered this a cool theme, using necromancy not as a summoner type to attack enemies, but rather as a utility to protect the sanctity of life and death. I’m interested to see whether Rook will follow this pattern or whether he will forge his own path.

As a suggestion, I’d like to remind you that conversations are about giving and sharing information. In most cases, the MC does not share any info about themselves and instead only asks questions about the other characters. Of the four peers, the only one the MC actually has a give and take with is Ash, and that’s only if the MC knocked her over. Of course, I can understand why this is so, as the MC shares their abilities, their past, and their motivations with the headmaster. Even so, a bit of minor flavor text here and there would go a long way to making the conversations feel more mutual and less like interrogations.

All in all, I’m excited to see what comes next.

@TheKing_GamerAntoinn: Uncertain as of now. Either you go back “home” and we find out more about your life thus far… orrrr we skip that and jump straight to first day at the Liminal Academy. I’m not sure. Rowling did start out with Harry at the Dursleys… XD

@kckolbe: Thanks! I’m either going to add two more… orrrr take the one I’ve got out. I’m not sure how I intend to use them, beyond providing feedback to the player. I don’t want to do something like only providing a ‘bold’ choice to sufficiently-bold MCs. I think people should have the option to play cautiously until the stakes are so high they feel they have to act boldly, for example.

Are there any games you (or anyone) can recommend for how they handle personality sliders?

@E_RedMark: While it’s probably not the best way to win friends and influence people, yes, you can have a spider familiar.

@Bizimo: It may take some extra work, not being among the ‘typical’ familiar options you’ll be presented with… but I’m inclined to say yes.

@VainCorsair: Thank you! It’s definitely going to take some time, but I’m hoping to see it through to completion! Though of course this is really The LIminal Academy: Year One, with three more years to follow…

@Kamer: Thank you very much for the detailed feedback! With regards to Ash: that’s definitely a chosen name, which you’ll learn if you get close enough to them. And I’m looking forward to how various characters develop myself… I’m definitely something of a ‘discovery writer.’

I absolutely agree that the conversations need more work. I’m just not sure the best way to handle it when one obvious topic of conversation is what magic you can do, and I’m delaying that choice until the interview. But maybe I shouldn’t. I’ll see what I can do… thanks again for the feedback!

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There’s a lot of ways you can go on trait sliders, either having it affect some “auto-responses” by the MC based on tendencies, making certain options selectable only if the slider is far enough in one direction, or even just leaving them for just posterity. However, I will say that allowing a player to go cautious until an uncharacteristic bold act is more feasible is tricky. Most of the time, such an uncharacteristic play decision will make a char seem less real, it becomes just a numbers game. That’s not a bad thing, by the way, depending on what you are setting out to write. Is this SimHogwarts, where the player is just trying to put together the most successful student record, or are you hoping to provoke emotional responses? If the latter, I would lean toward making certain options only available if they make sense for the personality.

I liked the demo so far :slightly_smiling_face: Good luck and I wish you an everlasting motivation in your HG work!

Some of the questions feel a bit rude?? Commenting on the boys accent, asking about that persons gender and mentioning that girls blindness. It might have been how the choice was worded but it made me not want to ask them.

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I normally have no filter either so I don’t notice it but now that you mention it it does feel rather rude.

As in real life, you are not required to ask every question that pops into your head. If you perceive a question as rude and you are role-playing an MC with a personality most similar to your own, you are free to not ask that question. Additionally, some questions you may think are rude may not be seen as rude from the perspective of the person who answers the question.

Case in point: Asking Ash about whether her hair is dyed or is naturally that color has Ash basically saying, “Mind your business.” Asking Alina about her blindness, however, has her give you a genuine reply without thinking poorly of you.

Just as in real life, whether the question is rude or not is entirely up to the context and the people involved.

@kckolbe: I feel like allowing the player to fully control their character is unlikely to make them seem less real. People will just disregard choices that don’t match their conception of their character. And personally, if I saw a grayed out option because I hadn’t boosted that stat at the beginning, and it was something I wanted to do, I’d be annoyed. Not annoying the player seems like a good goal, so I’m not going to do that.

I may just drop the personality slider I already have… right now it seems like a stat for stats’ sake.

@Mei_Hiroshi: Thanks for playing! I’ll try to stay motivated… I know a lot of beginnings go nowhere, but I’m determined to finish this one!

@DeeFlavored: None of those were intended to be rude (unlike the hair question for Ash, which they WILL bristle at). I may need to give some thought to “softening” such direct questions… I do want the player to ask, if they’re curious!

@Kamer: Thank you!

And @everyone, I’ve updated the beginning. You can’t get any further, but the conversation trees are now branchier, and Rook is now someone else entirely. Apologies to anyone who liked the original Rook… I like them too, and I hope I can find a place for them, in this project or elsewhere… it just didn’t really make sense for them to be attending the academy.

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