The Legend Begins (WIP)


#1

Alright guys it’s been a while since I’ve updated you all, it is still finals week so I’m under a lot of stress but I’ve also had not time to make any progress on the game. But I have been thinking over what I plan to do and I think I’m ready to put it to a vote.

First of all, plans for the future. Instead of four there will be a max of three books depending on If I can think of enough content to make my second book an individual book. I have already begun creating the plot of the second book. There will be two totally separate paths splitting off in the first chapter with no ability to switch between them (let’s just say option 1 & 2).
Option 1: This spoils the end of the first book (major, like seriously the entire book!): You take your deceased father’s place as Duke
Option 2: You will also have the option of being a freelancer which then leads to two more options (these you may have the ability to switch between)

  • Either 1: become a mercenary offering your skills to the highest bidder, or lowest whatever you choose.
  • Or 2: Become a thief stealing from travelers on the roads and from their homes.

New Version

First, continuities:

  • I will be keeping the map (although it will be changing for either option)
  • I will be keeping the stats screen and the save system
  • I still plan to have a 8-9 chapter first book
  • You will still start in Hollowborough

Now for the changes:

  • Have you ever watched/read Narnia or Lord of the Rings? In my new version I plan on having at least 4 different races although I will probably be making more. They will all have different abilities and disabilities.
  • An example of one of my races from my notes (although more may be added later):
    Aoximian (Aoximians) (Species):
    Low voice, tall, Strong, hulking, muscular, very hearty, eat only meat, stoic, sleep lots (10-12/day), big - big body head hands, short stiff prickly hair (not porcupine though) everywhere, large red eyes, forward-facing ears on side of head, long face with wide back part, very tough skin, gray-tan skin, feet like apes, famous for skill at fighting, believe in many different gods, dead leaders become gods, everyone else becomes followers (angels) in their eternal fight, Love to drink and brawl, bloodthirsty, known for honesty and honor despite their bloodthirstiness, live in human-like villages, males and females same deal, Ancient language that isn’t used anymore except for singing and reading old documents, when someone takes a leadership position they are there for life but when achieving their position they may be challenged and whoever wins the fight becomes the new leader, females can lead but generally do not as it is still culturally accepted that males fight and lead and are the smartest while women stay home and watch the young, some of their best fighters are women, everyone knows how to fight and when they go to war entire societies can be destroyed as everyone is killed off, everyone’s last name in a village is the same and must always marry outside the village - usually managed by the leader, generally immune to disease, stretched lifespan (long childhood and long life) - oldest known to have lived about 600 years (legend) average is 400 fully grown at 40-50 but skin continues to harden as they age, fighting done on foot (normally too heavy for other animals), most common weapons are large, axes and war hammers, three fingers - one opposite of the others, lawless, defensive, dumb
  • In addition to that I originally planned on forcing the main character to be male as was culturally acceptable at the time, now I will let the player choose but females are still deemed as less capable even by the more tolerant races like the Aoximians.
  • I currently AM NOT allowing the main character to be a race other than human because that would make coding a nightmare for the second book. The kingdom in which the mc travels to in the second book is the one on the center island. Comprised mostly of humans, who are distrustful of all the other races and therefore shun them. For this reason the mc has to be human.
  • Humans are not the only race that is distrustful of others but are the least tolerant.
  • The story will follow more or less the same plan as the old version but will definitely be different in some way because of all the new changes.

All things that I have changed and have not changed are up for debate, but please don’t be insistent.

Old Version

Basically you start as a young boy (changed) in the town of Hollowborough, a small town out in the farmlands. The recent wars between the nearby duchies has left many cities, especially the small ones like yours, depleted of manpower and the duchy under siege.

The story is set in a fantasy medieval time pre dating gunpowder. I plan for there to be 8+ chapters in the first book but everything is still a wip including the title. If you have any suggestions I would love to hear them. I plan to have a save system and a unique stat screen that you will have to wait for a demo to see. I am currently in my second chapter (changed) but I think I write strangely as I prefer to write a section with the barest of structure and then go back and add details. My goal by doing this is to have less continuity problems as I will write all the details for one character at once. We shall see how that works out. I may even add some mythical creatures in as well. (changed) I am currently working on setting up a very short demo. I am working on a map as well but that is very far from being down as i am drawing it from scratch.

  • Keep new changes
  • Return to the old version
  • Keep new changes but you need more (please explain below)
  • Neither your new or old options are any good think of another idea (please explain below)

0 voters

Please select the one that is most accurate. Even if It doesn’t ask I would love to hear your reasoning behind your choice. If you would have picked something else please tell me what it would have been!


#2

It sounds promising. I’m looking forward to your work! :smiley:


#3

The idea sounds nice but lacking heavily. Exactly what’s the goal, plot, and what will be doing in story? Or are you still trying to figure that all out still?


#4

I’d like to think I have a general idea about what will happen. I have a sentence summary of what each book will be. Beyond that I have a 1-2 sentence summary for each planned chapter of the first book.
I believe I have a decent first chapter and am working on a second. I hope my story will have surprising moments so I apologize but my summary is only partially intact because I don’t know some parts but also because I want to leave it for the readers to discover by themselves.


#5

Sounds pretty interesting, looking forward to what you come up with!


#6

Different writers work in different ways. You shouldn’t worry about not having a full-blown outline and stuff more traditional writers do.


#7

Calling all Geographers! All map makers, map readers, map enthusiasts and anyone else with eyes and opinions! :smile: Here is my WIP map. All four of my books will be based off this map so I’m thinking it better be good!

Besides the black straight lines in the center, the rest of the map is just the natural parts. It would be awesome to hear people’s opinions on the map as I have no experience. Even if you have none it would be great to have another opinion.

In addition I am also currently compiling a list of city, kingdom and ruler names. Most factions will be feudal based so I will be needing many city names and ruler names. I’m not sure how many cities I will have I think I have maybe 30 names so far.

Anyway here is the map Tell Me What You Think! I really want to know! even if it’s just “that’s really cool.” or "that’s really boring and stupid."


#8

I think it’s cool. What are the black lines on the island and the black part on the top left corner supposed to represent?


#9

the black lines on the island are going to be a city (the circle) and a road (the horizontal line, although it appears I will have to make it a lighter brown so it is more noticeable) and walls (the other black lines). The grey is a huge stone wall I have yet to think of a good name for and I don’t want to copy other fictional or real places (like from Game of Thrones). And the black area is uncharted area, to be discovered at a later time, which I am thinking will be the fourth book.


#10

Do you have a rough scale? How long is the road for instance?


#11

That is still in the process of being figured out. (WIP) But I was thinking the map would be relatively large. Would the time it takes to travel from one side of the other being about a day or 3/4 of a day by horse sound unreasonable?

Just as a side note the city (black circle) is suppose to be the largest city in the game/world.


#12

Perhaps look into the famous road networks and then figure out relationship for your world. The Roman system in Italy was different than the Spice Trail … but both might be appropriate, so, idk. But that is what I’d do.


#13

That is a good idea. In the beginning I was planning on all the roads being dirt roads and I believe the Romans had a stone road system. But now that you said that I think I will continue with that idea in the area inside the walls you see and on the island. In my planning I had decided that that area would be one kingdom. But this would be the beginning of the first trade empire, thus this kingdom would be the more advanced of the 5 I was planning. I was also planning on having the kingdoms sort of represent various countries or empires from their golden ages, for example I was thinking potentially Mali or Persia in the west (left), some European land empire in the south (bottom), a nomadic empire is the east (right)- probably like the Mongols, and I wasn’t quite sure about the north (top). Has there been any great civilizations based off of or closely related to mountains and forests?


#14

Mountains: Tibetan Empire, Darcia, Georgia, Seljuk Turks, Ghavids and their successors (out of Afghanistan) <ugals
Forest: Germany, HRE, Russia, Celts, Bunch in India…

Huge empires like the Abbasid had every terrain in them… There are so many possibilities. The real challenge is going to make everything work together. (That is my challenge too)


#15

Thanks for these. To narrow down my search, do these all exist pre-gunpowder?

And I’ve finished with most of the coding stuff but have hardly any story down at the moment. What would you guys think about a tech demo (correct me if that is not the right term)? Waste of time or useful?


#16

yes, all the listed realms are pre-modern.

I wrote a small demo to get initial feedback and I am happy I did. Other writers want a near-completed or completed work done before unveiling it. It really is up to you.


#17

I meant like pre-napoleonic civilizations not modern (dark ages and back)


#18

How about some black outlines? To make it clearer?

Or color everything, outlines and all in a sepia tone for an old map feel?


#19

It has promise… but the details are horribly lacking? Although maybe because you just started? I would suggest focusing on your story proper first (the characters, plot, world, etc) and once you have that figured out, start messing with the technical stuff.


#20

What do you want outlined? Everything?