Found some more things.
Spelling Error 1
Having been welcomed—somewhat—to to Memphis, you set about establishing a haven.
The area around Beale Street is the economic and cultural hub for the freedpeople of the city. There is a ghetto knows as “the Pinch” on the water; recent immigrants—particularly the Irish—start their time in the city there. The Appalachians and other poor whites cluster together to the east of downtown. There is also an enclave of Northerners who have relocated here in to aid in the reconstruction of the city. Finally, you could take up residence in the newly-annexed Greenlaw Addition with the nouveau-riche.
- The Beale District.
- The Pinch.
- Among the Applachians.
- Among the Northerners.
- In the Greenlaw Addition.
A spelling error. Would it be possible to tell the player where their character would be most welcome? It’s obvious for Irish characters and black characters, but not so much for others.
Spelling error 2
It takes several minutes to pull the story from the two men, but finally you learn that Harvey—Wilson’s brother—has finally decided to flee the plantation where he is enslaved. Wilson has promised to help him, having arranged most of the necessary details to convey his brother noth.
Should be north.
Would like another choice 1
“And that’s why the previous system worked so well? Because the fieldhands…stayed in the city?”
“Exactly! I’m so glad you see it my way.”
Noticing that Aichinger and Eliot are rotating back into earshot, you quietly thank Bailey for his counsel.
The evening concluded, they each offer a way to contact them, should you have need of them, and then excuse themselves. Before you depart, Aichinger invites you to feed freely within the beerhall—on this occasion, at least. A small gift to the new arrival.
- I do not trust this gesture; I return to my haven.
- It is likely that hunting here would be too easy; I prefer more of a thrill. I return to my haven.
If you don’t have the type of prey that shows up in the beerhall, could you have a choice that reflects that? “I would accept his offer, but I don’t see my type of prey here” or something.
Spelling error 3
Walter Krupke, the governor’s bodyguard, is about to translate an introduction for you when van der Ahe interjects and insists on doing it himself. He introduces Theresa Overstreet, the governor; her broodmate, Samantha Withers; and Walter Krupke. In life, Overstreet was a short, homely woman with mousy hair. Undeath has not made her physically more attractive, but she radiates self-assurance and—frankly—power. Withers, on the other hand, was mildly attractive as a mortal, but seems much less grounded than her broodmate. Krupke, the bodyguard, is not terribly large, but looks like a born warrior. When the introductions are completed and despite the intervention of van der Ahe, it is clear that the governor seems entirely unimpressed at your inability to communicate directly with her.
Should be Van der Ahe.
First person error
It is with no small amount of awkwardness that you escort Samantha through the city. You point out the sites and name things, but you are unable to relate anything of what you know about these places to her.
At one point, she stops you on a corner of Jackson Square and tries to ask you something…something about Jesse! She’s clearly waiting for an answer.
- I say ‘yes’ emphatically.
- I just smile and nod.
- Frown and shake my head.
-
I try to reiterate that you have no idea what she’s saying.
“You” should be “I”.
Would like another choice 2
“You are aware that the general is a respected member of the Freemasons?”
“Yes.”
“You must understand, then, that the Freemasons are an influential mortal organization. As such, it behooves us to maintain good relations with him.”
“Why should you bother maintaining good relations? Tell him what you want, and see to it that he obeys you.”
Pickering shifts in his seat, evidently trying to invent a suitable retort. “The Rule of Reserve demands circumspection, Mr. Engels. While the Order may be the province of mere mortals, that does not mean that it should be discounted.” It seems you have a few more moments before General Pike returns from the privy; what else would you like to ask of Pickering?
- “What city do you call your home? At least, until you win the election.”
- “Do you know the identity of Carothers’ maker?”
I would like the options to tell him to stay away from my human. Especially since he was noted as being particularly tasty.
Possible continuity error
She arrives at her point quickly: why does someone known for his support of Stone side with Lesczynski?
When you supply no convincing reply, she offers a way to contact her and recommends that you write to her to learn more of Stone’s cause.
You thank her and continue with your goodbyes.
Lesczynski approaches you. He dances around the matter, but in short, seems to be urging you to support him during the next election. He presses his calling card into your hand, suggesting that you write to him before then. You promise him that you will and soon excuse yourself.
I can’t write to her to learn more of Stone’s cause. When Pickering tells me to write to him to hear more about Stone’s crimes, I also can’t ask about that when sending letters.
Illiteracy inconsistency 1
You write the letter and send it off.
August arrives, suffocating the city under a blanket of moist air. The city holds its breath, fearing another outbreak of the fever, but thankfully no sign of the plague manifests.
A letter arrives from Carothers. In it, he explains that the true purpose of praetors is the extirpation of the various heretical philosophies that periodically take root in the Society. These heresies pose a danger to vampires as a whole and must not be allowed to propagate.
To whom would you like to write?
Illiterate character writing a letter.
Illiteracy inconsistency 2
After spending some time observing the city, you put some thought into how you might integrate yourself with the community. A vampire needs allies, after all.
1) Though I have no talent for writing myself, these newspapers seem to wield a large amount of influence.
2) I wish to involve myself with the criminal underworld.
3) I will involve myself with the turnverein, gymnastics clubs with pan-Germanic political overtones.
No talent is putting it mildly, my character is illiterate. And illiterate characters with creation will fancy themselves writers. lol.
Spelling error 4
"Lady Sosotris!" cries the sideshow barker, "purveyor of the future, seer of the unseen.…" He gestures for you to enter, using his cane to part the curtains before you.
Should be Sosostris.
Spelling error 5
“My dominus’ wishes are finally fulfilled.” Eliot folds the newspaper in his hands. It’s early November—yet another November—and a small fire in a stove does nothing to warm you.
“Pardon?”
Eliot passes you the folded paper, but you push it back. "Tell me what it says.
“Really, Andreas…”
“Just tell me…” you retort.
Missing quotation mark, also I would like to know what tone of voice he’s using when asking really? Is he pitying, exasperated or something else?
ERROR
Your search comes up short. You talk to anyone and everyone who might have seen something, but the culprit seems adept at covering his tracks. ERROR
The months continue to tick by.
Encountered an ERROR in play.
Maker error
“There…there hasn’t been a true war since Adonis and Sostrate codified the Three Rules. That was in A.D. 325; that’s over a millenium and a half ago,” Bailey stammers.
Sostrate? The sibyl of Sinope that Mme. Sosostris mentioned? The question pops into your head.
“Could Stone be so reckless?” Eliot demands.
“This is unthinkable,” Aichinger growls. “We are not animals. We do not need to hunt each other down as such.”
"We should organize support for the Cuban revolutionaries. By supporting them, we aid my dominus."
I think the game mistakenly thinks Villanueva is my dominus, he isn’t.
These next errors I found by looking at the code, I’m not the most code-literate person around, so keep that in mind.
Instant death
*if (discretion > 70) and (applethorp_rapport > 65)
You feel the fury rising up, choking you with its bile.
*if willpower < 3
*label attack_apollo
*set killed_by_vampire true
Your fangs @{(shapeshifting > 2) and claws|} extend. With a scream you launch yourself at Apollo.
He catches you head in his massive right hand, your arm in his left. "So disapppointing," he says. And then he squeezes.
He squeezes until your head explodes in a spray of blood and brain matter. As quaestor, he is well within his rights to end you. You doubt that he will even dignify you death with an announcement.
Who would even mourn your passing?
If you have really good physical stats, would it be possible to survive the insta-death events with Carothers in the conclusion of Memphis? I don’t mean beating him in combat or something of the like, surviving by fleeing or something would be good. It has to be really annoying to die because you don’t have 3 willpower. That being said, these insta-deaths by Carothers events are so specific to achieve in game, I’m not sure anyone would find them without trying to get them.
Impossible charm checks
*if (discretion >= 40) and (discretion <= 60)
“My apologies if you have misconstrued my intentions, Ms. Malloy.”
"Your intentions? What could they be other than to drive me from the election?"
"I was simply looking out for your best interests, Miss Malloy. You have a questionable past, and the matter was best addressed now rather than after your election."
*if (revolutionary_credentials > 60) or **(charm > 4)**
*set malloy_rapport %+15
She looks at you in disbelief.
"I…I had not considered that, ${mr} ${surname}."
"Well, perhaps you will before you address me so harshly in the future."
"Of course…" she mumbles, drifting away from you in embarrassment.
*if (revolutionary_credentials <= 60) and **(charm <= 4)**
*set malloy_rapport %-10
"Enough of your lies. I will have no more of them," she exclaims, wasting no time in leaving your presence.
Pretty sure it’s impossible to have 5 charm at this point in the game. I think both of these charm checks should be lowered by 1 each. There’s a similar check for Pickering in the same scene with the same impossible 5 charm requirement.
Wilson/Anselm error
*if wilson_embraced
“He is your progeny, is he not?” Carothers says, pointedly.
*goto wilson_killed_2
Of course, none of that is your concern, exactly. Instead, it seems that Carothers and Withers are about to have a serious problem.
"It seems as though we have a problem, **Mr. Maddox.**" With that, Carothers tears the hood from ${wilson}, who blinks momentarily as he takes in the scene around him. "You have broken the rules. And the rules say that you should die."
**"But Ah don' have ta', does Ah?"**
"No, you don't have to," Carothers says. Looking at you over his shoulder, he gives a brief smile. "But that doesn't mean I will forgive you."
If I’m reading the code correctly, Anselm would talk like Wilson here and would be referred to as Mr. Maddox.
Lesczynski too patient?
*if (rationalism > 60) and ((religious_tradition != "pagan") and (able_to_identify_jews and (memphis_haven != "pinch")))
*selectable_if (discretion > 40) #"Do you hide your horns under your hat?" After all, I've been told all my mortal life that Jews have horns!
*set discretion %+5
*set anachronism %+5
*set rationalism %-5
It takes a few moments for Lesczynski to formulate a response to this query. "I am sorry to disappoint you, but there are no horns. In fact, none of us have horns. Rather, there was a misunderstanding by your Saint Jerome: when he said that Moses "grew horns", what it actually said was "emit rays of light". Until that Luther fellow, all you Christians used that same translation, and it has caused us no end of [i]fardeiget[/i]."
You look at him quizzically, the strange word unfamiliar to you. "Perhaps I shall have to learn Hebrew some night, and see for myself. I had always been told that your people had horns."
"I'm telling you, we do not. If you do not believe me, take a look," he says, gesturing towards his head.
You pause a moment, considering this offer.
*if discretion > 60
"Very well, I shall." Reaching forward, you take a hold of his head, seeking evidence of any devilry. It seems, however, that he is speaking the truth.
The room goes quiet at this display but quickly returns to its normal volume once it is determined that you mean no violence. "I trust that you are satisfied, then?"
"Yes, thank you."
Can we just take a moment to acknowledge the fact that Lesczynski must be the one of the most patient vampires in this game? He lets the player character feel his head, looking for horns, without losing rapport. He is so patient about this in fact, that I’m not sure if he’s not supposed to lose rapport for that.
Faith or Science?
TODO No questions of faith or science?
To readers: What would you ask here about faith or science?
Maybe the character’s opinion on the theory of evolution, and how that relates to vampires?