Born of Dust: Espien (Small Update 02/11/2017 - Check post 290 )

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Thank you all for your input. I appreciate it. Shadows/Darkness manipulation will definitely be one of the new powers written in.

@Sammysam, I never really thought of the two as being so similar but now that you’ve mentioned it, I guess you’re right. The powers would have a different working mechanism but would basically start out the same. Lifting objects, moving them, making things stay in one place. I suppose the difference wouldn’t be seen until MC would become a high level user of their gift. Maybe I’ll write it in last after the game is nearly finished and make them go together. Like combine the two to have a Gavikinesis + Telekinesis power type. <<<< Maybe. See how I feel later about that. Thanks, that was my first thought as well. I’ll write the inspired ones.

@Mr_Popo That was a really great idea, thank you.

@bomsasa and @Waywalkerlover, I’ll have to spend some time on it. There would of course need to be limitations with transmutation. eg. can’t turn things into fire, water or electricity. (It would be like writing duplicates of pyro, hydro and electro uses). Other elements should be fine. I’ll probably have to have a restriction on people too, otherwise we’d all just turn Ms Claude into something undesirable :coffin:

I couldn’t remember that reference, so I had a gander online. Midis touch? :rosette:

With botanokinesis, I was ready to put that idea on the bench for another story but I may just keep it now. Thanks to those for your opinions, for and against. @vampierkid222 and @Mr_Popo, I totally forgot about grandma having those powers. I’m always reminded of Poison Ivy, but yeah, I’ll agree; grandma was pretty cool. @poison_mara yeah! I’ll have to put some poisonous plants into the bestiary. I was originally thinking how cool it would be able to control a carnavine and take out enemies. (For age 12).

How do people feel about digital data manipulation? Like, it wouldn’t be very useful for the family route but it could be used for the lab route.

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That would be intriguing as well I could see how that would be a advantage over other kids.

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I like this, I have questions tho’

  • Can I pull a sword out a computer screen?
  • Can I travel through a digital network?
  • Can we back up our mind on computers?
  • Can we just lock everyone out of their computers for the fun of it?
  • Generally Technokinesis/Technopathy would include data manipulation, why not use that?
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Nice guess but no. And I would very much like to see gravity control if that’s still on the table.

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I"m still toying with the idea of it. So I only have a rough idea of how I’d like it to work. To answer your questions.

  • That’s a pretty cool idea. Creating weapons that way. I’d probably make it temporary in the beginning though.
  • Yes. I was thinking that only the mind could go through the network though. Like MC’s body would still be vulnerable.
  • That would actually be useful. Eg: if MC is brainwashed or had memory tampered with, MC could get the memories back.
  • BAHAHAHA! That would be funny as. Also useful for what I have planned for age 12.

I’ll work on the idea more and check out Technokinesis/Technopathy. Maybe allow MC’s abilities to grow and include some things from the two.

@waywalkerlover, gravity is still on the table… but it’s at the back now near telekinesis. May merge the two powers to have some sort of hybrid abilities for the high level user. Since the lower levers would be similar.

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A very old book? . . .

:musical_note:I beg your pardon I never promised you a rose garden
Along with the sunshine there’s gotta be a little rain sometime :notes:

I actually would like plant powers too :grin: but I’d like mine to be more like a Dryad’s, but with umph - like day of the triffids

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Nope. Lol I might have been the only one who’s read the dairy of a teenage superhero. It’s free and I highly recommend it.

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Hi All :smiley:

Thank you for being patient. As you might have already seen or heard, dropbox will no longer be rendering html files. So, on the 3rd of October the original link will probably try to get you to download the game instead. I will be removing the link around that time and will provide a new link in a recent post which will allow a playtest with the updates… Please keep in mind that I’ve only been able to write/code/edit at a hobby pace. :relaxed:

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Hobby pace is still better than no pace. :clap:

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Okay… so small, like… miniature like update to age 12. More to come on that. It gets a little confusing at this point as a lot is supposed to happen so thanks all for bearing with me.

Added in hydro options. Took a little longer than I thought it might. Feedback on the hydro uses would be nice if anyone has the time. The other powers will be coming after I get age 12 out of the way.

Also, I’ve finally decided on the name for it. I’ve changed it to “Born of Dust: Espien” from The Gift: Uprising. I’ve chosen to do this as the new name will fit well with any future game books I have planned around this.

Playtest-----> Born of Dust: Espien

Enjoy :slight_smile:

P.S
Thank you @UmbraLamia for using your magnificent skills to update the title for me :smiley:

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Happy too see this back as well😁

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Oh. My. God. Faints from excitement

I missed Oriel.

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Okay, lets see…

Being a Hydrokinesis user, Oriel shows dislike at the pool.
However, when with Claude’s group, she’s actually nice, like, really nice, to the Hydro MC?
Then, at the battle royale, she hates the Hydro MC again.

Also, as an apprentice, the selections is a Team Battle, but with Claude’s group, it’s a Battle Royale?

Another thing, with Claude’s group, at the battle, my MC was tagged out, but one paragraph later, is shown to be still fighting.

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For some reason, I was able to select from Pyro, Electro and Hydro power sets, even though I didn’t use the password.
NOTE: I did type the password, but it was wrong.

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Hmm… sounds like I coded something incorrectly with ms Claude’s group. I’ll check that out. She’s not supposed to like MC Hydro at all.

If you end up competing in the task set by Ms Claude there are two different tasks that might appear. First is Battle Royal, the second is Team Battle. Either one can show up for an apprentice trying to secure a mentor role or if you told Zeredah you wanted to participate.

Do you remember the text for where MC came back to fight? That’s a continuity error.

Thank you for taking the time to let me know @UmbraLamia

I’ll check that. Usually the password works. I might have left open the code while I was running a random test and forgot to remove the code that restricts it to the password. Thanks @Sifr

Edit

I’ve removed the code that didn’t restrict the elemental gifts to only the password. (I did accidentally leave the code in there). I checked the password. It should work. it has to be written exactly as it was given.

I’ve fixed the code in Ms Claude’s training group. Oriel’s dislike should be consistent now for Hydro user.

I’m still trying to find the continuity error for that fight scene.

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The polls just keep on coming…

Which of these is your favorite power?

  • Precognition
  • Telepathy
  • Psychometry
  • Pyrokinesis
  • Electrokinesis
  • Hydrokinesis

0 voters

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I remember it’s in the Battle Royale section. Can’t find it either, forgot the exact options I used previously (and sometimes, I just get the Team Battle).

While searching for it, I noticed that you used “your” in place of “you’re” in some instances.
I remember one where Oriel attacks Hydro MC after Pinellas and Kalon walk off.

Also Dew Drop :joy:

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Ahahaha… that’s what I get for not proofing my work… :disappointed_relieved: it just… takes - so - long! hahah. I ran it through word and went over it. hopefully I got it. :+1:

It’s okay. It’ll probably show up again.

Dew drop :smiley: I liked it too. I should add that nick name in the tasks too.

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While I enjoyed the WIP, I couldn’t help but feel that it goes by far too quickly, without enough character introductions. I mean, first of all I get to hang out with some children who don’t (to my knowledge) appear again; then a woman I don’t think I’ve met before wants to be my mentor; then it’s four years later and I think I’m friends with some other apprentices, but I don’t really know anything about them; and then another woman I don’t know wants me to do something for her; and finally there’s a big fight with a lot of people, some of whose names I recognise (but none of whom I actually know). Would it be possible to have more time to get to know these side characters?

Hope this isn’t too negative. Good luck with the game. :grin:

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Hi. No not negative at all. :smile: I need feedback like this too. It’s good that you’ve let me know that the pacing felt too quick. Likewise if someone felt that one scene just seemed to go on forever… and didn’t add to the story at all.

I was actually planning to slow the pace down in age 12 (on the lab side) so that MC could get to know the characters a bit more. I felt like it would have been unrealistic/an info dump too early for each of the characters to reveal too much in the beginning. There are little bits of info here and there though.

MC’s Peers that can be met again in age 10 from recreation day…

Narita: Can be chatted with a bit if → (Help Zeredah foil Anna’s team to steal information). Same for Edith. She won’t talk to you though if you made her look bad on recreation day.
There’s a short training session with Oriel if you end up chosen to train with Ms Claude’s group. Kalon is also in this same group, as is Pinellas.
Avian under most circumstances, can not be met previously and make it in as an apprentice. If you don’t make it into a program (but previously meet Avian), there is a choice in age 10 where him and his mentor help you train a skill.
Dorton is a part of the group that is brought together by Anna to steal information on Ms Claude. You need to be in this group on task day to interact with him.

Mc Mentors: you can not be offered a place as an apprentice without having met either Sera or the JagLinn Twins. The exception for Sera is when you have found the option to choose between her and Elias.

As an apprentice, you can chat to Avian if your mentor isn’t Sera. Actually I think you can still chat to him if your mentor is Sera, but you need to go looking for her. With Katima you will have the option to visit her later to check on her, if you stayed back to eavesdrop. If you choose to be mentored by JagLinn Twins your other roomy is Sakeri. There are interactions with him.

When approached by either Anna or Zeredah (depending on what situation your in), there are options to learn a little about them and how they fit with Ms Claude.

Suggestions?

What sort of interactions would people be interested in seeing when getting to know the other characters? What kind of things do people want to know?

I’ll also be letting MC from the family side get to know MC’s peers a bit more before the pacing picks up. Jana, Kenneth - if they lived. As well as Joe’s child.

Many Thanks @Baam for updating the title for me.

I noticed the dropbox link getting a lot of hits… despite it being the OLD link.

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