The World of Aerath - Treason on the Border


#1

Hi guys!
Khaz and I have been hard at work over the last couple of days and we are happy to say the the demo for our game is ready! Please click the link below to give it a try!

https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/180883095/treason%20on%20the%20border/choicescript/dfabulich-choicescript-04e8d60/web/mygame/index.html

We welcome all comments and queries, so leave us a message at either our facebook page, website or email address. Links are below.

Website

Facebook Page

Email Address
worldofaerath@gmail.com

Thanks in advance for giving our game a go!

Aiidan & Khaz


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#2

Game looks great! Really enjoyed what you have so far and I am excited to see it developed further.

On my first play through there was a bug when selecting my friend. Although on the next play through I couldn’t reproduce it when I selected the same friend. I picked a stone born “male” and the error happened with a nonexistent variable on line 591. I have not had it happen since my first read.


#3

Hey there Winterhawk! Thanks for the positive feedback. I’m not 100% certain but I believe the error has been fixed. As soon as we put up the demo we noticed a glaring mistake with the Stoneborn and spent a frantic 10 minutes fixing it. I think the bug must have come up as we were replacing the newly outdated scene. Sorry for any inconvenience, if you can reproduce the error or find any others, please let us know!


#4

When i try to pick a veil(i think thats how its spellt ) i got an error


#5

Phew!

I couldn’t help but scratch my head at sheer size of your game. How the hell do you, and will you keep track of all these stats? All the branched lines?

But, a good show. I can see clearly see the amount of work you’ve poured into this, and that, coupled with your crazy ambition has certainly made it into the largest game in the community.

Two things though:
The very long character-creation/character’s past suffers from a lack of immediacy. I’m making choice without worrying too much about it. In that, I’m not particularly caring that I select this or that (For example, the friend seems to be an important character? But he/she has no personality whatsoever for the relationship to matter.). I think you should make the player care more, or possibly, be more efficient with the choices. I think the latter is easier to achieve. Have a narrower character biography.

Second, the long character creation sort-of, at least in my opinion, retracts the sharp tension with you begin as a prisoner.

But great work so far. Interested to see where this continues.


#6

@Vampierkid222
Hey there! Well…veil in our world refers to a magical barrier separating Aerath from the void. I can’t think of any choice within the game that references it yet. Was the word Valae perhaps?

@cilvercat
Thanks for the in depth feedback :slight_smile: As far as keeping track of the stats goes, the answer is in a word, spreadsheets. We’re pretty aware of the potential for this to balloon out to an unmanageable point. In fact it has already happened to us on a couple of scenes. That said we have processes in place to try and keep track of everything and we record what we do fairly meticulously. To be honest sometimes it’s more difficult to remember what we named something within the flavour text than it is to remember the variables.

As far as the point in regards to immediacy it’s a totally valid concern and something we’ve talked about rather extensively. We landed on the current format mainly because we believe it isn’t overlong in relative size to the rest of the game. What we have posted thus far is about a fifth of the first game. We think of it as the childhood phase where things are displayed in more broad strokes, since as a child I believe you generally have less agency in regards to what you do and your understanding of the going-ons around you. Where we ended the demo is essentially where things start to kick off significantly and the personalities and motivations of those around you (Best friend in particular but there will be several other important characters) will become clearer I hope.

With that said it is definitely something we will take on board when we get back to writing, thankyou!


#7

Ah well good it’s been fixed, but I did find another error. When you select the member of the Deep Dwellers it has this as the next scene.

"(Gain 5 Trap Evasion, Open Locks, Stealth, Street Knowledge & Sixth Sense - Lose 5 Karma - Gain 3 Gold Marks - Gain Item: Lock Picks - Gain Perk: Cult Member - Deep Ones)

Because their teachings are forbidden as a matter of policy in Kundrukkar, the Deep Ones must meet secretly and "

Also the places where they are mentioned makes them sound like a fringe political group, but the stats and karma losses make them seem more like a terrorist cell. I think the early mentions of them should make them sound more hostile instead of like isolationist. I think they could use some more explanation, although that could be because of the uncompleted scene.

I absolutely love the Stone born race you’ve created. I think that taking the stereotype of “there are no Dwarf women and that Dwarfs spring out of holes in the ground” and running with it was a great idea.


#8

Hey WinterHawk,

Yep definitely an error. Subversive groups are a big part of our story and this will be rectified as we go. There may be other small errors in the text, some of what we do is copying from Word or other notepads, so we greatly appreciate anyone pointing this out for us. It’s getting a little late in Australia, so it won’t be in the next few hours anyway.

On the “to be fixed” list :).

Thanks again,

Khaz.


#9

@WinterHawk

Found out what we did wrong! The scene involving the deep ones was the aforementioned glaring issue we found with the Stoneborn. In our frantic fixing we accidentally deleted the end of that response. oops >_>

Anyway the text is now restored and we cleared up some of wording in the choices to make it clearer that the Deep ones are crazy little psychopaths. Thanks for pointing out the error!


#10

No problem mates. Glad it’s getting cleared up. There are reasons it’s called Alpha and I am called a tester.

I haven’t done much outside of stone born but I will be sure to give you feedback, once I do.


#11

OOOOMPH! I HATE IT WHEN IT ENDS! :smiley: I simply adored it! I liked how it described the surroundings, i could clearly imagine what was happening, love it!


#12

This is good stuff, I wish you luck on completing this work


#13

This was great! I was disappointed when it ended. Hope to read more soon.


#14

Amazing i just missed some charismatic or magical way to avoid the potion guard tries to make you drink.


#15

I loved it and and quick question r we allowed to romance our best friend?


#16

Firstly, the content that you have so far is really great, and I’m eager to see what further updates will entail.

When playing as a Stoneborn, I decided to go with the Deep Ones. Imagine my expression when I got to the picking a tutor part and I couldn’t choose the Deep One tutor because the special perk for them didn’t stick to my character.

(Bug fix ahoy!)


#17

OMG!!! I love it!!! Please don’t let died off


#18

This is wonderful keep up the good work


#19

THIS WAS AMAZING!!! :((
*Tears of joy*


#20

Pretty good looking forward to more