The Rosy Ones (WIP)

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So anything the mc can do then to get better access to what should be their own damn money now?
Otherwise my poor mc will be stuck forever with the super boring and a bit on the childish side “wardrobe” he has now, while the others all have cool stuff. Plus I guess he might want a pocket car of his own (assuming he even has a license). It’s not a good look for the guy who technically owns the company that produces them now to not be able to afford its signature product(s). :disappointed: :worried:

My poor mc. He’s very shy and sheltered (not to mention a virgin) at the start.
But, like Chai, my mc is not in full accordance with the path his mom and now Hera want to push him on. If he had actually been less sheltered growing up he would most likely have ended up as some sort of pro-athlete. Although he does like tinkering with machines too…particularly the kind that move, aka plains, trains, automobiles and boats. So in an ideal world he would have been an athlete who would have been studying engineering, not business, on the side to have something to fall back on after his pro career. :thinking:

Expect my mc to be quite envious of Chai’s fabulous wardrobe and to bother Matt a lot with all sorts of engineering questions while always volunteering to help Matt prepare for tests/finals/midtersm. In his own business studies he’d probably be a really middling/average student, mostly because his heart isn’t really in it. :thinking:

Well I said my mc totally could on account of certainly being strong, tall and athletic enough to do it and likely for an extended period of time at that. Chris Hemsworth-esque physique is one of the few things my mc does have going for him at the start. Of course it is also paired with being shy and socially awkward…at least at the start.
So the problem is not with the could but with the would part. So Chai would actually have to take some initiative to make something like that happen. But of course I can totally imagine Chai dragging my poor mc to some concert, deliberately picking a bad spot and then asking to climb on a tall and muscular mc’s shoulders just to be able to see the stage. And probably afterwards claiming it was the best seat in the house. :grin: :smiling_imp:
The other way for my mc to pick him up in book 1 like that would probably to either fake or badly sprain one of his ankles for real. :thinking:

Apologies for the excessive fanboying by the way it’s just that I am in mandatory Corona self-isolation at the moment and thinking of cute fictional guys helps relieve the boredom a bit.

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LMAOOOO I can imagine all the teasing he’s going to get if he doesn’t have a license or a pocket car himself! This isn’t a spoiler, but Hera’s going to give MC more than enough allowance weekly and will give more should they run out. Funds are still held, though, to make sure they finish their studies and take over the company.

And thank you for reminding me! I have it in my notes to have MC pick a car or something and I keep forgetting. I imagine their Angel Guards will get tired of driving them around everywhere, especially when they start dating.

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i’ll keep an eye out for any other funky coding o7
(loving this so far btw :heart:)

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How come I stumbled to this just now

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31-01-2021 UPDATE! Full Chapter Three!

The demo (unedited, rough, ugly) now stands at 84.8k words without code and 93.4k with code, and with about 50k words per playthrough. That is weird. Very weird. Might change chapter cutting in second draft (I suck at chapter cutting anyway), unless it’s not that big of a deal.

I added stats here, but haven’t gotten around to adding them in Chapter Two (also have to add more breakfast choices there, lol). I fixed continuation issue in Chapter One where one of the choices had no prelude to it. I don’t think I edited anything in the past chapters aside from that.

As usual, too, I will add more manipulative choices in the future as I get ideas. Or in the second or final draft!

About Chapter Three

Chapter Three will most likely have some errors. I only wrote this as a rough draft with missing scenes, then rewrote it into the program with code and with the missing scenes. I didn’t check yet aside from the quicktest and the random test. I’ll fix continuity and pacing errors during the second draft, as with the other chapters.

So, yes, please also tell me any errors of any kind you come across as you play! It’s tough having to read through 93 thousand words with code by myself lol.

And this chapter was pretty easy to write because I’ve written bits and pieces of it while I was stressing over the past chapter! And because I did cut off a bit of this from the past chapter. Next chapter has a few scenes written but don’t expect it to come too quickly. I will try not to take any more breaks, though. I thoroughly enjoy writing this and wish to finish it sometime this year.

Happy reading. I hope you guys like this update, and most importantly, I hope you’re all having a great day!

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the code typo i mentioned before, during the breakfast scene, has been reimplemented
also a incomplete page break command here

Screenshot_20210131-030546_Ecosia
Screenshot_20210131-030546_Ecosia1079×756 158 KB

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Wait I think I may have used the unedited chapter 2 lol and copied it into this set of scenes intead of the other way around. I’ll change it tomorrow. And the page break, thank you for telling me!

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adoring having a MC that just straight up deadpans the truth and everyone’s like ‘checks out’.
also i kinda wanna question; for my playthrough i said no to joining in on the resurrection, is it like a mindwipe and MC suddenly thinks they do want to join ? or will MC be more aware that something isn’t right with what they said ?

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You have a very interesting WIP and I am very excited to see how it goes

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Wow, this is incredibly good. There have been quite a few releases and WIPs based on Greek mythology, but the worldbuilding and modern setting made it feel very original. The mystery/conflict is intriguing, and I looooved the characters. I felt like I would’ve liked an opportunity to get to know them a bit better, but maybe that’s planned as the game develops. Given how long it is already, I’m actually feeling optimistic it might get finished, which makes me very happy!

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There will be little instances where they’ll go, wait, why am I doing this? (which actually reminded me I forgot to tag that in the coding lol, if the player picked ‘no’, fixed that!). But mostly they’ll act like they wanted to join this whole time.

Oh, I also fixed the coding mistakes you pointed out! Thank you for that!

Thank you so much!

Thank you so much omg. And yeah, more getting to know each other stuff in the next chapters. It’s still actually their first/second day since meeting each other lol, the first part’s just been so long. And yeah! I’m also quite optimistic this might get finished. I have a few more scenes in other upcoming chapters already written so. Thank you for this! :heart:

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Absolutely adored the WIP, I basically binged it in a day.

I’m not sure if it’s just my choices but I’ve kinda noticed that Chai and Matias have the least amount of scenes with the MC so far, whether it be out of choice or just in scenes where the whole group is together. They’re probably the two ROs I’m most interested in right now so I’m hyper-aware of this lol. Just a small critique.

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Kind of on a similar note, I felt it would’ve been nice to have an early scene with Rosa. When I had the choices, I picked the ones that said she was my best friend (before leaving for the clouds) and that she was like my sister (Mystic’s bookshop), but those were just statements I was making to myself or other people without any actual scenes to really help me feel connected to her.

It seems like it might be possible to just leave her behind based on your choices? If so, I understand why the history was a little thin. That said, it did feel a little odd to make choices declaring her importance to me without really anchoring them to anything. The story does try to do that a bit with exposition, but having some positive (and/or negative, based on your choices) interactive scenes happen during your childhood or adolescence would really help build that relationship. That felt important to me, because she was the only part of my old life that was going with me into the new one. She sort of ended up feeling unimportant, though?

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Oh yeah, it’s because their scenes [that are non romance specific, anyway] will come chapter 5, I think. When I wrote down what I knew for sure I wanted to write, the ROs each were to spend time with MC outside of the player’s choices for stuff. River and Zakia in this one for stealing the body. Akira and Kali had a lot of scenes due to their role in the plot (and they’ll have another scene next chapter), and Chai’s and Matias’ roles will be more prominent in Chapter 4-5. So, I’ve just been trying to add them more in other scenes. I’m sure there are other ways I can add them more that I haven’t just yet figured out.

That’s on my To Do list! With her and Blair. I think I’ll add a scene or two more in Chapter One or Prologue in the next drafts or when I think of it/figure it out. It’s because she was at first going to be unimportant, or at least I didn’t know what I wanted her to be, then I figured out her story as I was writing Chapter 2&3 and haven’t/will not yet rewrite prologue-Chapter 1.

Thank you both for these! These are certainly going on the To Do list for the next drafts, where I focus more on the finer details than just putting the plot on paper!

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announcement :slight_smile:

(I posted this exact thing on Tumblr and was going to post this here, too, at the same time but I had it queued on Tumblr and was out when it was posted :frowning_face: If you’ve already read this on Tumblr, it is the exact same thing.)

Quite a few things changed since I first started writing this book. And it got me to thinking, since I’ve already written near a hundred thousand words, I will stop updating the demo for now and go rewrite the first few chapters, then (or maybe simultaneously) write the remaining of the demo. I might make some cuts in chapter length depending on what happens, too. My original demo plan might also change in length.

Whatever happens, I will announce when I’ve finished the whole demo — I will not update by chapter anymore. It might have a few new scenes, or maybe chapters, or whatever, when I post it. Once I put up the new demo, too, I will have to look for beta testers who can go help me with the testing for the rest of the book! But that’s for another day :smiley:

If you have any suggestions, you can tell me so I can see if it’ll fit into the demo/book! I’m already adding new scenes with Blair, Maya, and Rosa now that I’ve also fleshed out their characters from all those months of writing, and I will also try to add Chai and Matias more in the first few chapters because, and I did realize this while writing Chapter Three too, they barely showed up compared to the other characters. More manipulative/evil/mean choices will also be added, and the stats will be better.

Classes will also start soon, so good luck to me! I don’t think it’ll affect me that much since I don’t put too much effort in my classes. Not that I don’t study! I just don’t want to stress myself out about it too much. This will probably take time of that portion I spend updating Tumblr/answering asks but not too much!

I have asks queued on Tumblr from 11 am-12 nn pst every day (except this weekend, because I was unexpectedly busy), sometimes several, other times just a few (I’m trying to answer the past asks I wasn’t able to answer!), depending on how many I have answered in my drafts. I’ll post updates about my progress every Saturday, too, maybe.

I’ll also still do commissions, I like writing in a more linear way from time to time. Basically the only thing that’ll be different is that I won’t be updating by chapter anymore.

TL;DR: I will not be updating the demo by chapter anymore. I will rewrite the whole demo, update it at once when it’s done, and, maybe at the same time, continue on with the book. Other things (tumblr updates, commissions) will go on as usual.

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Opened at author’s request.

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Is this story back since it’s been opened up again?

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The updated demo I promised back in February will be posted this weekend! It’ll be chapters 1-3 only instead of the full demo (which I am estimating to be until 5 or 6).

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Does it still have the super cute dragon boy? :persevere:

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