I find the mc of this story soo intriguing and amusing, in a morbid way, to play as! You’ve definitely managed to elicit both ‘’ ok. this is getting creepy’’ and ‘‘I’m becoming paranoid of each new character introduced’’ responses from me with Jonny and Roach’s characters. . The mc’s inner narration and the build-up scene truly made me believe that Jonny was the Hunter, since he was shady as heck; and as shameless as I am, the possibility of him to be the Hunter still didn’t prevent me from picking the ‘‘wink’’ reaction, lmao. Now I’m very suspicious of you, dear Roach .
This wip is something special for sure and I can’t wait to see more of it !
1/3/2019: Corrected punctuation (I think I got them all), misspellings, and that odd sentence that was pointed out. Polished Teen!Livvy’s dialogue (hopefully it’s a little less awkward now but I’m an awkward person so). Took out the stat-based nonsense on that first convo with Fiama; if you’re nice to her, she’ll be nice to you. Changed the color of the titles. Added the option to write down your own pronouns if you’re playing as a non-binary MC.
This is great. The tone, the slightly creepy edge that’s present in all scenes, and the characters so far… I loved it.
But especially, I loved the MC. Hilarious. I think you did a great job to capture the arrogance and disbelieve of a great and powerful being trapped in a baby’s body . I tend to play with morally good characters, but I’ll definitely be doing an “evil” playthrough just to see the MC’s internal dialogue.
I gotta say, this is a very entertaining game! I’m actually very engrossed in it and I love the dissonance between the eldritch abomination and the human world, and I also like that I can adapt further to it. I really like Roach too! I was put off of him at first but he’s really got an infectious personality. Plus, that cliffhanger! I can’t wait to read what else you have in store!
You might just be onto something, Prof_Chaos What if Roach is some kind of hidden extradimensional scavenger abomination that’s just waiting for the Mc to have their ‘‘showdown’’ with the Hunter so they can nom what’s left of Earth.
I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.