Look is that a three head monkey?! Or you fight like a cow
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If your game has a criminal partner former with a three head monkey and a swordmaster cow i would laughing during days
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I don’t know if those 11 sequels are something you’re seriously thinking of, but if so, and even if not, maybe a class-related subtitle might be good? Something like… The Beastie Watch - Episode 1: The Rascal’s Poisonous Intent.
Also, and more importantly, I must know… in the game, can you romance Phil at all? 
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@Shockbolt That…actually sounds like a lot of fun. : D (Also I’ll have you know that the Throthrul are an ancient and proud race!)
@poison_mara Hmm, I will have to give that some thought. Janie, whom you’ll meet in the next update, does like her Cryptids!
@Falingard Probably not? Only because my idea of a fun game is no violence, and Beastie Watch that is not. The subtitle idea is a good one, though–I will ponder it! Thanks!
Phil…you know, I don’t know yet. Not currently? I’ve thought about adding Clivey, Phil, and some of the Merry Mafia (maybe Muriel?) as ROs. On the other hand, I want to be sure to deliver good quality characters and romances, so I’m unsure about how many more ROs are sensible. (There are four currently).
If you’re especially fond of Phil, though, I could certainly give it a go! She’s one of the easier ones to add, since there’s already a good bit of content with her. Besides, the MN4 agents are absolute fun.
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Who are the known ROs then?
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The current ROs are Reggie, Edie, Anthony, and Sarah. One of them has a stipulation, though, and one them has a, er, wee surprise.
Almost the entire rest of the cast are possibilities, except B00P-D33T! (although I suppose one could try to romance it. Mileage however may vary.)
My general policy is that if I allow the reader to specifically flirt with someone (as opposed to general Rascal charm), that person is a potential RO.
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Played through this last night. Marks the first WIP I’ve given a look to- although I haven’t been here long.
Going to offer some general thoughts, now, with the caveat that I intend to make another run through it with notepad in hand to catch more specifics later (though I’ll note also that I’ve only given a cursory skimming of the other posts here).
First- digging the setting. It’s whimsical and fun with a certain edge to it, as well. This gives it a pretty fresh feel and offers a pretty unique world to play in. Definite props on the inventiveness. The terminology in the dialogue was fun, too, while being fairly intuitive. That you included a glossary with a dictionary was also helpful on the few times I found myself wondering what someone was saying.
Not sure I like the lock-in as a rascal class, but that may be my own personal bias against playing rogues on the whole. Part of that feels like it dings against player agency, though I will concede that there is a wide lattitude within that.
The next thing that comes to mind is the choice to let the player pick gender and name coming late. It felt a little jarring in that moment. I might suggest you do it earlier instead of waiting ten or so chapters in. I’ll concede that that may be a little less novel, but it’ll improve the flow of the story quite a bit, I feel.
There may be more you can do with the stats, but I’m honestly not much for the numbers side of things. I don’t feel like I had a terribly intuitive sense of what my stats were going to do for the actions I selected, to the point that I was just selecting options that felt coolest/cleverest in the moment. That may be more on me, though.
There were a couple of grammatical/spelling errors I noticed last night, but did not have the foresight to jot down. Nothing excessive, but might be worth smoothing out.
On the whole, an excellent and well told story with a really novel and clever premise. I’d buy it when you’re done based off of what I’ve seen.
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Thank you so much for the thorough, helpful feedback! This is brilliant. And thanks for the kind words regarding my game, as well!
The slang is authentic 30s parlance, and so are many aspects of the setting. I’m glad you enjoyed it!
The rascal-class lock was partly to comply with the theme for the 4th Annual ChoiceScript Competition, which was ‘Poisonous Intent’. My other WiP does not have a class lock, and it’s taken me a year to write 3 chapters partly because of that. I may consider layering on a couple of other classes eventually, but I’m not sure.
Also, there are 12 classes and each is represented in the game. So you’d be doubling the class of another character. I don’t like playing rogues either, normally, but I can certainly work on continuing to expand the role. Which class do you generally prefer? I can try to emphasize appropriate aspects of the relevant class…
I’m going to move the gender and name up quite a bit. When I originally included it, the entire introduction didn’t exist. I agree with you; it’s jarring to pick it (ahem) two chapters into the game.
I wondered if the stats were too obscure. I’ll take a good look and see if I can make the related skills a bit more obvious. Although I do think choosing the niftiest options is a very legitimate way to play the Rascal–it’s meant to be a possibility. There are some hidden stats helping that sort of character along, as well.
Grammar and spelling corrections always welcome!
I’m so glad you’ve enjoyed it thus far. I hope the plot also delivers when the game is finished! And thank you again for the very helpful feedback.
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Certainly. I do apologize for the slight hyperbole, there. 
As a rule, I tend to play as warrior classes- fighters, paladins, knights, barbarians and so on. Enforcers and Pugilists definitely held an appeal to me.
I get the class lock in that context. Certainly makes sense, and it also makes sense about doubling up. That was just my thought as I was making my way through things.
All in all though, keep up the good work!
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I’m glad you mentioned. I can put in some more opportunities to mash things directly–that’s partly what the Brash stat is for. You can stab things in the update that’s going up in a week or so, too! (Well, one very large thing, at least!)
One of my fantastic alpha testers has requested ranged weapons for the Rascal, but I haven’t decided for sure yet because it’d change the gameplay significantly. I can add slightly better weapons than the Rascal’s wee dagger–suggestions welcomed, to be sure.
And thank you!
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A sap … for this story would be great. A sap would also be easy to balance and as a third bonus you can provide both a violent and a non-violent path each fight. … You can also use the sap in interesting Rascal ways while doing other nefarious things.
With a user name of @BK64 this statement does not disappoint… just saying.
tsk tsk tsk. This won’t make them go easier on the testing.
Edit: Before anyone asks, a sap is a type of night-stick used by sneaky Rascal type characters, usually hollow inside but filled with sand or other such material inside the weapon.
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It’s really funny you mentioned the sap. It’s number one on my list of weapons proposals.
Also included are the blackjack, the monkey’s paw, and a ball peen hammer.
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I play as a rogue bard and my weapons are my tongue a lute a dagger a bow and sexy clothing and all of them poisoned… No need whatever… I suck in weaponry and mage… WHO IS A BARD? MARA is
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Calm now,we all now know that Mara is a bard so keep your head on Mara 
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@Zolataya I had considered a cosh (that’s ‘sap’ to you across-the-ponders’ lexicons), but it’s a weapon already claimed by Muriel, the Mobster. I suppose I could let a Rascal with violent tendencies nick one and have at it, though! Not too much different from nicking one of Reggie’s weapons. He’ll never notice, eh?
@BK64 Maybe the jemmy would suit? It’s a fairly straightforward use for a quite Rascally tool.
@poison_mara Yes! My canon MC for other people’s games is also not as fascinated by weaponry, although Tesni is probably a mirror image (the reverse, I mean) of Mara. But bards all the way! Sadly, I have to let Rascals do their stabbing, conniving, wily, tricksy things. The bard game will come someday, I think…if only so I can include more musical references than a magician could stuff into a tophat.
@moonwalkerdragon All bards half price in the Poisonous Intent. (;
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Two thoughts here:[spoiler]
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Sometimes classic Rascal weapons are classics for a reason - I’m sure the MC isn’t the only dagger user in the world, so why should Muriel be the only one using a sap? A sap can be non-lethal or lethal as well; it is perfect for adding choice to your fight scenes…
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If the MC gets pissed at Reggie, I’m sure showing up at breakfast with a certain lion headed cane and flashing it in front of everyone would make a point to our fearless leader … might also make for some comic relief - just saying. [/spoiler]
Enough thoughts for a bit?
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What’s a sap? Sapo in Spanish is frog so you punch people with poisonous cane frogs? I WANNA A PUNCHING POISON FROG GLOVES
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Think of a police officer’s baton/night-stick/billy-club but modified to allow a theify type of character to knock someone unconscious without killing them. The modern models often collapse into a tiny bity thing that you can put into a purse.
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A sap is a flexible leather weighted “club,” for lack of a better word. This explains it better than I do:
http://www.badguystuff.com/article_police_sap.html
@Zolataya - naw, just a touch different. The sap and the blackjack differ from other impact weapons in that they are constructed from leather with leaded/weighted striking ends. It’s always been my understanding that they differ from each other in that the black jack is stiff, where the sap has some flexibility.
The ASP extendable batons you’ve described don’t really have a lot of give to them, but you can put a lot of sting on someone with them.
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Buuu I prefer a frog glove
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