Thank you for the feedback guys, i am relatively new this kind of story writing but i want to try nonetheless. So with that I made a tiny choice game in Notepad with all the notes everyone gave me:
*comment Copyright 2010 by Dan Fabulich. *comment *comment Dan Fabulich licenses this file to you under the *comment ChoiceScript License, Version 1.0 (the "License"); you may *comment not use this file except in compliance with the License. *comment You may obtain a copy of the License at *comment *comment http://www.choiceofgames.com/LICENSE-1.0.txt *comment *comment See the License for the specific language governing *comment permissions and limitations under the License. *comment *comment Unless required by applicable law or agreed to in writing, *comment software distributed under the License is distributed on an *comment "AS IS" BASIS, WITHOUT WARRANTIES OR CONDITIONS OF ANY KIND, *comment either express or implied. *title Sample Choice Game "Camp" *author Mr Suitz *create mc_malefemale "" *create muscles 10 *create smarts 10 *create improv 10 Looking out the bus's window, your eyes once again sees nothing but greenary. It seems the camp is further deep in the forest than initially thought. With that thought you move your eyes towards the other potential campers, glimpsing mostly at people's hair. Everyone appears to be sitting by alone, yourself included, your bag taking the empty space next to you. Feeling completetly bored, you open your bag to check if you have everything for the upcoming two weeks. Your parents made sure you packed extra *choice #boxers and breifs. *set mc_malefemale "male" *goto bag #panties and bras. *set mc_malefemale "female" *goto bag *label bag This camping trip will last for some time. You really did not planned this, you parent just suddenly told you about this camp at the last second. While checking you belongings you noticed you mostly packed *choice #sports gear. *set muscles +25 *set improv +15 *goto contents #a lot of protection against nature. *set smarts +25 *set improv +15 *goto contents #everything you think you need for the two weeks. *set muscles +15 *set smarts +15 *set improv +10 *goto contents *label contents *if sports gear. # Shorts, sneakers, swimsuits, tank tops and about other stuff to aid you in your muscle growth. You are a really atheltic person and hope camp will have provide an altenative exercise routine than your daily one back at home. *if a lot of protection against naure. # Insescts that suck your blood, filthy critters, and you pray at least your bed won't have bugs in them. You dread whatever this 'outdoors' may hold. You got bugs spray sweaters and long sleeve shirts for protection, also long pants and some heavy duty boots *if everything you think you need for the two weeks. # You mostly grabbed you think you need for an outdoor adventure. suncreen, bug spray, and a book on surviving the outdoors.
I really bad at this so if you manage to find any errors just tell me. (so i can see what i did wrong)