Raishall: Call of the Abyss (WIP)- Completed/Closed

On the longest night of the year, spirits that hunger for blood creep close to the veil that separates life from death. If you disturb them, there is only one way it can end.

Update- Hi all, this is in final edits for submission. Thank you to everyone who tested and offered support for this project!

Hi everyone,

Long time no update. I’ve finally got my act together to put up the work I’ve done on this.

The game is complete. A demo is available below with the first path playable. The full game is currently in private beta. I may or may not make it a public beta at a later time, so please let me know if interested in volunteering to read it and I’m happy to give out the link :slight_smile:

Notes on the game
Raishall started life as an short game entry for Ectocomp in a previous year. (Recommend this comp, lots of fun, runs every year!) Anyway, because it’s written to a time limit, there were things I didn’t have time to put in that I would have liked to, and a few people expressed an interest in having it expanded out a bit so I’ve been chipping away at getting it written and debugged :slight_smile:

Couple of explanation points:
This is short. I know, not a popular thing. But I’m not planning on turning it into a really long game, (No really, I’m being serious this time :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye: I really do have too many other long WIP’s that I’m working on to add to that list right now. (Including a surprise with an existing WIP which I can’t talk about just yet!) If by some amazing streak of luck readers actually like it, it can possibly go on my list for a longer story set in the same world at a later time when my list of WIPs is shorter.)

The part from the view of the Raishall written in the first person. I know, another weird choice, but I wanted it to feel more personal. It does have an optional character generator for anyone who would like to use it. Is it easy enough to find?

There are three linked stories, 2 showing different perspective from the POV of opposing characters (the second story is 2nd person perspective) and a third giving a background story from the past (3rd person perspective).

It doesn’t have a proper introduction like most CSG’s, you kind of get thrown into the action. Again, this comes from its origins as a short speed written story. If possible, I’d like to try and keep that momentum going by not adding one.

It’s dark fantasy. (Not leaning big time into horror IMO, but dark enough not to be suitable for children. (The board tags are only giving me the option to tag it high-fantasy after an edit :woman_shrugging:)

What would I like feedback on?
Anything really is very appreciated. Happy to take on any constructive feedback good or bad :slight_smile: But I guess especially:

*Are the images working correctly (those element combinations were a bit of a nightmare to make, hopefully I have them all correct.)
*Any grammar/spelling/coding/correct tense/misgendering issues.
*I usually write CS games in 2nd person (You, your) where as this one is first (I, me, my). It’s a hard habit to break. If anyone sees any random “yous” floating around that shouldn’t be there (for the Enchanter path, the Spirit path is in second person so it’s ok there) I’d be grateful if you could point them out for me.
*Can you work out how to succeed? (Using hints if necessary- not recommended for the first playthough however.) I’d like it to be slightly challenging, but not hitting your head against the wall level frustration.
*Does it make you want to play it more than once?
*I’m not looking to make this really long, but if there’s any really jarring moments where you don’t feel like you can respond as you want to, let me know and I’ll take it under consideration if I can within the bounds of the storyline to add it in.

On my todo list:
Final edits.

Thanks in advance :grinning:

Complete version of the game: Closed in prep for submission :slight_smile:

(Running the game with a black background is recommended, the graphics suit the atmosphere that way better :slight_smile: )

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I like it a lot.

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It was short, but very nice to read :wink: :+1:

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So I’ve been wondering if there are any WIP’s that you haven’t read because I seldom find one without you in the thread somewhere lol😂

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Thank you @Eiwynn and @Vashnik! :blush:

@Nick_Miller: Eiwynn sees all on the CS forums :slight_smile:

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@Jacic 's threads are fun to read… very inspiring.

:two_hearts:

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I like this short story! Intriguing. Now I have to work on getting every ending…

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Of this I have no doubt :joy:

I’m not gonna lie, I usually prefer 2nd person games, but decided to give this a try because I liked the name of the game and the image, and I was not disappointed! I didn’t catch any yous floating around, but I did pick a few things: “The ruins are keyed to the deity who’s star I was born under (…)”, shouldn’t it be “whose” instead of “who’s”? And " (…) before poring the liquid from the unstoppered skin into the polished obsidian bowl." since it’s liquid-related, I’m pretty sure the verb should be “pouring” :eyes:

Anyway. I had to look up “gossamer” because I had no idea what the word meant :joy: as soon as the anchor thing showed up, I thought “I’m gonna have to pick north as my element, won’t I?”, and, I gotta say, it was nice to have that confirmed. My first summoned creature was Shatarn (and then Careperat, and Tyroporya, and then Kalaneraya…). And then I tried to mix everything up and got Shatorn? By then, I thought I knew what I was doing, and, obviously, I was wrong (at least I got an achievement? :joy:). Got Carotort, then Shatarn again, then Tyraneran, then… Tyranarn? When I purposefuly tried messing up the ritual (by then I kind of gave up trying to understand their names, though I feel like that might be something really obvious I’m missing…).

After maybe twenty minutes (and some ten more creatures) trying to figure out how to get the Tangled growth achievement, I got Kalanarn, and went “did it work??”, don’t ask me why, BUT it hadn’t. My dumb self finally realized I hadn’t tried all the combos of north/south and I’ve been facepalming since then lol

The only thing I missed was the chance to find out whether the chief was truly guilty or not, even if the line “You want to end up like the last person who disagreed with our esteemed leader?” kind of made me think he was. Besides that, maybe when you get the summoning gone wrong achievement, you can still have a chance at getting the creature to listen to you? Even though I liked the scene the way it went :eyes:

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Thanks @Diandra and @groundzero, glad you liked the game! :grin:

Oh wow, thanks for reading heaps of different combos and taking the time to let me know about the spelling errors and your thoughts on this @groundzero!

The names do vary depending on what choices you make through setting up the ritual (it’s kind of a multistage thing.) I don’t think you’re missing anything obvious. They shift around depending on what you attract :slight_smile:

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Depending on how you want to approach this game that would definitely be something intriguing to explore, as well as maybe add a little bit of world building on what li–er, existence is like on the other side? It’s definitely piqued my interest.

Maybe not as a title image per se, but I really like the image perfectly conveying the atmosphere you’re aiming for. Hard not to get 2spooky4me when dealing with ghosts and the like.

Some more general thoughts:

  • Wow, you weren’t kidding when you said it’s short, huh?

  • Definitely a unique take for what feels like a puzzle game and us playing Dr. Frankenstein. Not every day you get to summon spirits and monsters and end up watch things go horribly wrong from the perspective of the person doing it. :grin:

  • I’m getting a strong Celtic vibe from the setting. Is that intentional? I went in completely blind so I’m not sure.

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Thanks for the thoughts @RagEgnite :slight_smile:

No :confounded: This is what happens when you plan a story to be able to be written in a short amount of time. Although I’ve spent a lot more time on it since then, it’s hard to change the basic structure and pacing. Lesson learned!

Thanks! I like unique, that’s a big compliment for me :smile:

Not intentionally, but I’d been reading a lot of mythology including celtic mythology around the time I wrote this so it’s entirely possible those ideas bled through into the writing style. (The game I wrote directly before this one was about Each-uisge which are Scottish water horses. Nice pick up :female_detective: :horse:)

The original idea had been rattling around in my head for years believe it or not and was probably influenced at some level by some Native Australian myths about the dingo (a type of native dog) I heard a long time ago. One talks about an evil dingo (Kalpunya) being summoned to kill people in a neighbouring tribe who caused offense by refusing to take part in a ceremony when asked. A second talks about a dingo spirit being created as a guardian out of branches and animal teeth by a man with magic to protect his people against a monster. This story bears little resemblance to the original myths, and as you say has more of a celtic feel now that you mention it, but is where the idea probably started from originally.

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Hi everyone. Long time no update. I’ve finally got my act together to put up the work I’ve done on this. More info is in the first post of the thread :slight_smile:

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Okay, I’m very intrigued by the setting and exposition-as-you-go type storytelling! Being able to mix and match elemental signs and different traits of each your entity is a real challenge. It’s refreshing to a see a puzzle-like game on here!

I never ran into difficulty with bugs or anything. I would say that the fact that the endings come very abruptly felt slightly jarring to me, but I also understand that the game may be intended to be a short-and-sweet type of game. Still, there’s a lot of implied backstory, with the chiefs/mentor/family, that makes me want a longer story… I’m also not sure if there is a “right” or “ideal” ending, or if every ending can be seen as valid in the playthrough.

I also have nothing but praise for your prose writing. The descriptive sensations of earth, air, water and the feeling of being in the forest was very immersive.

I am somewhat unsure about the situation with Hilani’s son, in large part because MC doesn’t really have the resources to know whether or not she’s right or wrong. I understand that irl, it wouldn’t always be obvious, but it’s still a bit abrupt where I felt like I needed to make a decision with very little information available, and little time to decide.

What I’m very interested in is seeing the Familiar route, and how it differs from the sorcerer route!

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What’s the story about

Thanks so much for your thoughts and kind words @Tuunetoon!
Hopefully I’ll have that alternate route up soon :slight_smile: . I decided to rewrite some of it again as I wasn’t completely happy with it so haven’t updated yet.

@Custodes- There’s a link in the first post if you’d like to read it.

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Where’s the link

Bottom of the first post. I’ll put it here as well :slight_smile:
Raishall

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