February 2024's Writer Support Thread

I’m in :raised_hand: Don’t particularly like writing in my native language, but I do like a challenge.

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I’m neck deep in an action sequence at the moment. Been having fun with some of the failure outcomes.

MC takes a spill
It's at that moment where you lean just a little too far out on your precarious perch, and your foot slips.
        
Oh fu—
        
You desperately lash out a tendril but it barely slows your momentum as you plunge to the ground. All you can do is brace yourself for—
        
The impact of your body into unforgiving concrete drives all the air from your lungs.
        
*page_break Yeah. That.
        
"So uh… friend of yours?" Ranger's voice floats over to you, apparently too stunned to keep up the act.
        
@{fracture "For fuck's sake," you hear Fracture snarl.|"Oh man…" Rampage's sigh hurts almost as much as the fall.}
        
You peel yourself off the ground, raising your head just enough to see heroes and @{fracture Fracture|Rampage} both staring at you.
        
@{fracture Mercifully, a well-timed thunderclap signals that Rampage is on the scene, bodychecking Hit and sending him flying.|With a tiny shrug, Rampage suddenly bursts forward, catching Hit napping and bowling him over.} Everyone else comes to life and battle is joined.
        
You regain your feet, doing your best to shake off your fall. With Rampage all over Hit and Mis charging straight at Fracture, that leaves Ranger as your dance partner.
        
He hefts the swordbat, pointing it at you in dramatic challenge. "Evildoer! Prepare yourself for swift justice!" He sure recovered from the surprise quickly.
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I do like the 15th. Love to read the shared extracts :slight_smile: Here’s one I enjoyed writing today.

Something wicked this way comes

image

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Testing, testing

Edit: WTH?! I tried to post a reply and it wouldn’t let me! I hit reply and it would just sit there and do nothing?! Why? ugh. I’m gonna message a Leader and see if they can help.

EditEdit: gonna test and see if I can put my reply here:

Your story is set in an asian culture isn’t it? omg, I absolutely didn’t even THINK of doing the work to give my players an option to choose if they saw names last name first or first name first. I cannot imagine how complicated that would get. TAT Nope. I’ve just left it Last name, first name. Because that’s how it would be in a translated novel. So yeah.

I’m curious about how this could be used, so what are you using it for and can you show us?

Samurai of Hyuga series does this quite well! All the sections in the PC POV are second person (You) and then the other POV sections are all third person (He/she) (if I’m remembering correctly.)

This is an interesting way of accomodating someone wanting to discover things themselves. I might steal it!

Yeah, this seems a bit more in line with making sure immersion isn’t broken.

I have five and let me tell you ITS A LOT. Like. Just be aware that if you are selecting that many, that causes a LOT of coding/branching.

jesus fuck I cannot imagine coding/wiritng for 9 seperate ROs. Oh my gosh. you are a stronger writer than I, friend.

I read this and immediately had flashbacks to Star Trek’s aliens, all of whom had a basic humanoid structure (because humans were playing them). XD It was amusing.

Should this be for carrying?

Is this meant to describe dusty rose colored lipstick? Because I love wearing that shade.

Holy shit I want this fucking implant so bad.

I try to think of what answers/options would be logically available to the PC at that time, and then prune them down based on what stats I want to test/grow/reduce.

I hadn’t considered this question, actually. I suppose I just wrote the character the way the character was written when I was planning it to be a fanfic. I just… adjust for choices then. So… I suppose I don’t care about forcing speech to remain in choices only.

MOOD.

I laughed so hard at this sudden jarring word. It was beautiful.

FUN

Holy shit does it, omg.

Hahahahah oh wow, I laughed. XD I hate writing fight scenes AT ALL. They are the bane of my existence terminally, and I even have grown to hate watching them in tv shows and movies. Like, ugh.

See this! You pick a genre that doesn’t REQUIRE the things you’re hating. I chose Palace intrigue because most of the fighting ISNT physical, it’s the sneaky mystery schemy type stuff that results in fun dramatic reveals!

HOLY SHIT that is amazing! Hats off to you, my friend, that is QUITE an accomplishment!

I thought this was someone named Jessamine talking, and that they somehow turned Vine into a Verb. XD

Okay, as a gardener, this straight up fucking intrigued me, though. Like, wow. I kinda wanna know more about these sentient blood-roses that apperantly name themselves and psychically link to other blood roses.

I SEE YOU, BIBLE REFERENCE. I SEE YOU.

I’ve never heard of *bug before? What’s it do? (or alternatively just gimme a link to the wiki, if it’s described there…) Also, I love looking at your code. I always learn so much from you!!!

VERY intriguing ROs!

I’d be fucking hilarious if this was the foreshadowing and they’re actually flying into a black hole that is in fact the butt of some ancient space worm creature.

pffft, I laughed so hard, omg.

Holy shit your snippet gave me shivers. Bravo on getting horror down pat, friendo.

Alright, alright, fine. Since it’s the MONTH OF LOVEEEEE and all that shit, I’ll post a snippet from the romance daydreams I’ve been working on.

setup
#[i]my prospects.[/i] 
    *comment describe player's place in the world, and what they could possibly do to improve it. give options - start business, marry rich, crawl into emperor's bed, get high rank in servants in palace, etc. affects virtues. 
    *if footnotes
      *set Dichild_footnote true
      *set Filialpiety_footnote true
      *set Momo_footnote true
    As a ${pc_title} in the inner palace, your position was a little raised, compared to when you lived within your father's mansion. As your father's illegitimate child, your status was basically the lowest in the household, lower even than the servants. However, with a position as a Palace $!{pc_title}, you at least have as much pull as a member of the main family. 

    This doesn't mean you'd be able to do anything should filial piety laws come into play, but at the very least you won't be bullied any longer by the servants of your father's house. Or, you shouldn't be, anyway. Not only that, but it improves your options for marriage. Instead of looking to a family servant, or the shu-child of a similarly-ranked family, your father can now look for marriages that might improve your station. Or, perhaps, if you manage to make a point with your service here, you could convince him to allow you to start a business, and earn money that way.

    Of course, you also have the option of staying in service within the palace, after your contract is up. If you manage to distinguish yourself as a ${pc_title}, you could climb the ranks to a @{pc_gender Momo|Grand Eunuch|Senior Servant} yourself one day. 

    *if footnotes = true
      *gosub_scene subroutines footnotes_sub
    *page_break
    Of course, your mind also takes you down the paths that aren't quite as... simple as good-old-fashioned hard work. You could, of course, attach yourself to one of the Palace Mistresses as a confidante and bosom friend. That was a quick way to make certain your prospects rise. Not only that, but Palace Mistresses always gave out gifts and presents to their favorite servants. 

    Another option was to attach yourself to one of the Palace Mistresses as a chance of meeting $!{Chengling_title} and perhaps catching ${Chengling_his} eyes. @{(PC_sexuality+1) A loving marriage between yourself and the ${Chengling_title2_text} was the sort of amazing chance that you found yourself daydreaming over often. Rolling it around your mind in rose-colored, flower-scented thought, as if it would lift you up from your lowly station.|A marriage into the Imperial Family, even as a concubine, would be enough to lift you up from your lowly station. Your father would benefit so long as you were favored, your brothers and sisters gaining fame and accolades. Being that important made your fingers tingle.|A romantic rendevous with ${Chengling_his} Majesty alone was enough to set your heart pounding. After all, if you could be truly interesting, truly beautiful enough to turn the head of someone so important didn't that mean you were worth something? Didn't that mean you had earned true love?|While you turn up your nose at the idea of your entire future being hung on someone's attention being paid to you, much less having to entertain such amorous attentions, you had to admit that the Palace Mistresses ate and slept and lived better than any of the servants in the palace, and way better than your life at home. It might be worth it, faking such adoration and care, in exchange for wealth... although it would be counter to your own feelings.}

    Of course, if you can find a way to distinguish yourself, you could perhaps live on your own, earning a living. There were ways to do so, and while you'd have to pay homage and your family would still be free to try and make use of you, if you were clever you could manage it. You just needed an idea, a business you could do to earn yourself some income. 
    
    Today, your imagination takes you to the thought of -
concubine daydream
#[i]being ${Chengling_his} Majesty's concubine.[/i] 
        *set scheming %+low
        *set Chaste %-low
        *comment used to decide what kind of concubine the player *thinks* they want to be.
        Your daydreaming takes you to strange places sometimes, but lately your thoughts have been following a similar pathway each time. You @{(Scheming >= medium) imagine working smarter, rather than harder. You imagine climbing your way up into one of the palace mistress's courtyards, and then into the $!{Chengling_title2_text}'s bed, either through your own schemes or simply because ${Chengling_title} notices something in you that they adore.| imagine working away, and then one day, meeting by accident a lovely ${Chengling_boy} in the gardens. The two of you talk, and without realizing it, somehow you charm them. You cannot believe your luck.}

        Something about you means that the next day in this daydream, you're given an Imperial Declaration, stating that $!{Chengling_title} has declared you one of ${Chengling_his} concubines. You can picture it in your mind, the Head Eunuch coming to your lowly place in the ${dept_palace}, opening a golden scroll and reading out your name in a clear voice before everyone. You imagine you wouldn't even mind kneeling in such a situation.

        Your mind conjures a whirlwind of dressing montages, golden trinkets, soft beds and warm braziers in a courtyard of your own, unbothered by the Palace Mistresses around you. You imagine, in your secret heart of hearts, a title for yourself. Imperial Concubine $!{surname}, or maybe Imperial Concubine
          *if (Constituation >= medium)
            *set XiuHua_footnote true
            Xiu Hua
            *goto conc_daydream1
          *elseif (Education >= medium)
            *set ShuYi_footnote true
            Shu Yi
            *goto conc_daydream1
          *elseif (Reasoning >= medium)
            *set ShuYuan_footnote true
            Shu Yuan
            *goto conc_daydream1
          *elseif (Athleticism >= medium)
            *set JieYu_footnote true
            Jie Yu
            *goto conc_daydream1
          *elseif (Charisma >= medium)
            *set XiuRong_footnote true
            Xiu Rong
            *goto conc_daydream1
          *else
            Error, please let Dev know.
            *finish
        *label conc_daydream1
        *if footnotes = true
          *set hanfu_footnote true
        . You savor the taste of that title on your tongue, and consider how you would spend your time as a concubine. The luxury of silk hanfu against your skin, the addition of meat to your diet, the thought of spending your time leisurely instead of working the skin off your fingers and the fat off your bones electrifies you. You imagine you'd be-
        *if footnotes = true
          *gosub_scene subroutines footnotes_sub

I’m actually a little mad about this section, because I only seem to be able to finish a single choice each week, and at this rate I’m not gonna finish for another six months on this ONE GODDAMN SECTION. TAT it’s going so slow… and I can’t force my brain to do better.

EditEditEdit: Wtf… Never mind, I guess?! Wtf?

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I don’t know? English prepositions are some black magic I can rarely decipher.

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I recommend you try any jam or something similar in itchio, or even locally. I think that a fault this forum or making stuff this forum has is all ENORMOUS in scope. That needs an energy and focus on the project for so long that burns. Disconnect for few days is a way to recover from that.

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Since I shared this snippet earlier this month where the PC gets to choose a book to buy (or buy all the books, as @AletheiaKnights suggested) I figured I’d share an excerpt from one of the books for my mid-month snippet. You can find the original choice I posted at the beginning of the month here:

And an excerpt from the beginning of the romance book:

To Court a Kitherin

You study the barechested man on the cover of To Court a Kitherin by Norina Devon. Dragon runes cover his arms and a dark indigo dragon is tattooed across his back. The shoulder he’s looking over has a diagonal scar, and there are several others on his right ribs and forearm. You imagine he has others elsewhere. He has an arrow and compass rose tattooed on his inner arm like Kai and Teo. The Kitherin’s hair is black as his tattoos, blown back from his face in the wind that the artist has hinted at. The valley he’s trekking in looks like Northern Rzskador, judging by the steep mountains and rocky peaks, and you can make out a castle in the distance. His eyes are narrowed, purple as his dragon, as if he sees some approaching threat.

When you open the book and read the dedication, you smile.

To everyone who has courted the fantasy of having an immortal lover.

You flip to the first page.
*page_break

Chapter One: The Barfight

The din of the tavern was a drunkard’s song of sloshing ale, thudding mugs, embellished stories, and raucous laughter, with some table pounding thrown in every few minutes. It was one of the busier nights I’d worked in my two weeks at The Tankard. I’d been running non-stop delivering plates of food and pitchers of drink since six, and it was nearly midnight. Past time I took a break to rest my feet.

Then I saw him in the corner. Hood low. Eyes hidden in shadow. Still and quiet when everyone else was boisterous and loud.

I dropped off the round of ale I was carrying and headed over to him. “What can I get you?” I asked, trying to see under his hood without being obvious about it.

He slid a coin forward, and I caught a lick of black ink at his wrist. The rest of his body was covered by his dark tunic and cloak. “Ale, please.” He spoke low, yet I heard him beneath the crowd. “And whatever food is freshest.”

He was the first say please in at least an hour. I took the coin and gave him a tired smile. “I’ll be back with the ale shortly. The food’ll be fresher if you wait a bit.”

“I’ll wait.”

*page_break You turn the page…

I felt him watch as I went, but kept my wits about me. Eyes up. Most of the patrons were too drunk or too rude to notice when I passed, so I was constantly ducking and side-stepping and jumping over legs thrust into the space between tables.

With a slurred shouting match comprised mostly of obscenities, two men jumped to their feet directly in my path. One threw a fist, and I tried to twist out of the way, but another guy came up behind me, pushing me aside to get to the fight. I elbowed him, called him something insulting and absolutely true, then tried again to get out of the fray. But when one idiot pushed another overgrown man-child into me, I snapped.

I picked up a chair and bashed it against the closest brawler, who let out a howl as the sturdy piece of furniture bounced off his back. He turned, meaty fist flying through the air, aimed at my face—and was stopped by a hand so still and strong the fighter’s knees buckled. He fell to the floor.

I turned to the hooded man beside me and looked up into eyes that burned with indigo fire.

He was Kitherin.

There’s a choice after this section and then a bit more story, but honestly this excerpt makes me want to write the rest of the story and have it offered as a novella IAP in case people want to read the whole thing. (Mostly because I want to read the whole thing.) :laughing:

This is a good point. I did a short game for a romance jam earlier this month and it was super fun and freeing. Nice to write something that was complete in 4000 words, rather than it taking 200,000+ to finish the game.

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You realized when you wrote this that I was going to suggest you write all four books in their entirety, right?

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:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: If only I didn’t have to sleep! I have enough projects to keep me busy writing for the next decade.

As much fun as it would be to read all four books in their entirety, I think the only one I’d want to write in full is the romance. The rune book, maybe. The history would be fun, and I suppose that one could work, but I’m not a horror writer so I probably wouldn’t want to write the full version of Drowning a Morpheus. One of the things I enjoy about adding book excerpts in my games is dipping my toes into genres I don’t usually write, but not having to commit to following through on the stories. I did this in TMP, too, if you visit the library. There’s a very gritty story that I enjoyed writing the beginning of, but I’d really struggle if I had to write the rest.

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Don’t worry, I wasn’t really expecting you to write all four books … but a gal can dream!

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It’s a high compliment that you’d even want me to write them all. :sparkling_heart:

I just need some sort of magic that takes the vague ideas from my brain and turns them into masterpieces without me having to come up with all the words, revise all the words, edit them again, and again, and… well, you get the idea. :rofl:

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Maaaaaybe? Look, my sense of fashion died long before I even hit puberty, so I’d probably have more luck figuring out quantum mechanics than whatever specific shades of make-up are called :sweat_smile:

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Here’s where I learned about it, and here is its wiki page. It is really useful: I use it all the time in conjunction with RandomTest to make sure I haven’t done something weird. In the case of the excerpt I posted, I wanted to make sure all the options marked with *bug were mutually exclusive because some characters don’t want to be romancing the PC along with certain other characters.

Here’s one from my game that includes the writing:

Raffi runs ${raf_their} hand over
*if ((hb_hairstyle_ch2 = 1) or (hb_hairbehaviour >= 6))
	your scalp, sending tingles down your spine.
*elseif ((hb_hairstyle_ch2 = 2) or (hb_hairstyle_ch2 = 4))
	the hair at the nape of your neck.
*elseif ((hb_hairstyle_ch2 = 3) or (hb_hairstyle_ch2 = 5))
	the back of your neck where your hair's tied.
*else
	*bug missing expected values for hb_hairstyle_ch2 or hb_hairbehaviour
The cool air is giving you goosebumps...

(Or a non-implicit_control_flow version:)

Raffi runs ${raf_their} hand over
*if ((hb_hairstyle_ch2 = 1) or (hb_hairbehaviour >= 6))
	your scalp, sending tingles down your spine.
	*goto air
*if ((hb_hairstyle_ch2 = 2) or (hb_hairstyle_ch2 = 4))
	the hair at the nape of your neck.
	*goto air
*if ((hb_hairstyle_ch2 = 3) or (hb_hairstyle_ch2 = 5))
	the back of your neck where your hair's tied.
	*goto air
*bug missing expected values for hb_hairstyle_ch2 or hb_hairbehaviour

*label air
The cool air is giving you goosebumps...

When RandomTest tests these text sections, if it’s possible for hb_hairstyle_ch2 or hb_hairbehaviour to be a value that’s not covered by any of the *if sections, it’ll fail and stop when it reaches the *bug line. It’s really good for catching continuity errors - in that section, I used it because I thought I might forget some of the hairstyles available (which when I ran RandomTest, it turned out I had!)

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I cut out all “distractions”—anime, manwhas, manhuas, the whole lot. Ironically, this decision turned out to be a significant misstep; it basically took away all my motivation. Now, I’m writing, but I don’t know why.

guess I was a little silly :clown_face:

procrastination - 0
me being silly - 1

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I have the perfect day for the Jam 21th may is the Day for the cultural diversity.

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It actually isn’t, but it is set in a future where China (and to a lesser extent, Japan) have been very iinfluential in space colonization. I figured since one of the ROs uses Surname/Given, I should try to let the player if they want their MC to be from aculture that does it like that (or if they just feel like it).

In my case it’s just useful its just useful to make a “fullname” variable that can be used in a multireplace and will be in the correct order, but it can be useful in other places too I’m sure.

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Looks like I need to rewrite my sentence there. Thank you for the feedback :slight_smile:

And here is the replacement:



I appreciate everyone’s excerpts and appreciate their value. Thanks for sharing such a diverse sample everyone.

And showcasing coding (line the *bug command) and other creative projects is totally valid… so don’t hesitate in the future to do so!

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Here’s a snippet of what I wrote last night (formatted to be read easily on the forum, not to record proper indentation).

Summary

*if (theuspec = 1) or (theuspec = 5)
#It’s time to use my new ${wisardric} skills to escape–however conspicuously.

Glancing around, you’re relieved not to see Theurges operating any of the nearest boats. You’ll have at least a slight reprieve before anyone starts using magic to pursue you. Pulse pounding, you reopen one of the cuts in your hand.

“Did you hear me, ${girl}? I sai–” When you @{(theuspec = 1) float off the ground|sprint off at an obviously unnatural speed}, the Alastor recoils with a shriek of terror. “Goety!” Gasps and yells rise from the crowd @{(theuspec = 1) below. Every eye cranes up toward you, and for an instant your memory flickers back to Rim Square and Theurge Chirex. Rising on your own power fills you with giddy exhilaration|all around you, with people stumbling in their haste to get out of your way}.

No point in subtlety now. You @{(theuspec = 1) slow your arcing flight for a moment|leap gracefully to the top of a pile of timbers,} and cry at the top of your lungs:
*if ((religion = 0) and (natl > 50)) or ((religion > 0) and (natl > 70))
“Shayard will be free!”
*elseif religion > 20
“Stand in the truth of kenon and be free!”
*elseif (religion > 10) or ((religion = 0) and (skep < 50))
“The Angels rebuke you, servant of a false Hegemony!”
*elseif (religion > 1)
“In the name of the Blessed Angels and their Eclect!”
*else
“The Thaumatarch will fall!”
*if (theuspec = 1)
Then you thrust your arm northward, pour your will into that impetus, and hurtle off through the air on a terrifyingly unbalanced course.

You’re airborne for less than a minute; that’s all the time it takes to reach the Mesniel Shambles, a densely populated maze of tall, ramshackle buildings and narrow alleys where you’ve spent much of the last two weeks. It takes all your concentration to slow your descent, keep yourself from spinning out of control, and avoid the chimney stacks and tiled roofs looming up on all sides. As you make your final turn and plunge between two houses, you glimpse two other human-sized silhouettes rising into the sky from the Locks.

And then you’re hitting the ground, hard enough to wind you but not break a leg, scattering a handful of terrified locals who run screaming in both directions. You run as well, screaming, “Goety!” as loud as the rest (if a bit more breathlessly) when you reach the first crowded market road.

By the time the Theurges streak past overhead, there’s no distinguishing you from anyone else in the churning mass. When they land and start detaining people for questioning, you’re just one of hundreds ducking off into any side alley you can find.

As you’d hoped, there’s no way for the small watch-force of aristarchal guards and even sparser Alastor force to comb the Shambles effectively–even with the help of the two dozen Theurges who appear within minutes. If you’d been trying to fight, the magi would have made short work of you; if there’d been more of you, they’d surely have used it as an excuse to round up dozens for Harrowing. But for all their power, they’re not able to find a single fleeing rebel in a crowd.

*if (theuspec = 5)
Then you dart off, falcon-fast, across the narrow beam of the lock-gate and into the alleys on the far side.

The Alastors give chase, of course, but their armor doesn’t just slow their running–it keeps them from crossing water confidently or vaulting walls. They can’t even keep you in eyeshot, let alone catch you. In the minutes it takes them to rouse some Theurges from canal-boat duty, you’ve already reached the denser alleyways of the city and have slowed to a normal pace again. You blend in perfectly with the crowds, all witnesses left far behind with your pursuers.

As the magi swarm overhead like frustrated wasps, you find yourself light-headed…not just from blood loss and the high-stakes pursuit, but sheer exhilaration. Being able to move faster than a springing cat, while everyone else around you is as sluggish as an ox in deep water? That’s one of the headiest experiences you’ve ever had. The feeling’s an illusion, you know, but for the moment it’s as if you’re untouchable. And you relish it.

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International Mother Language Day

International Mother Language Day annually on February 21 to promote awareness of linguistic and cultural diversity and multilingualism. The first International Mother Language Day was observed around the world to highlight the importance of preserving cultural heritage and diversity.

Is this related?

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I have nightmares that start like that.

I ended up being fairly satisfied with the fight scenes that I wrote for Turncoat Chronicle, but it’s no coincidence that my second WIP ended up being even more action-light.

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