Bethroned WIP

[Talyrion]

Really enjoyed the demo, and the concept is definitely promising. Can’t wait for the story to delve into this match made in hell (or is it?).

[Night_Shade]

10/10 story i can’t wait to see what happens next ^w^

[zerotosiki]

So far love the demo

[Ashborn]

I liked the game very much! I believe it has plenty of promise. I will eagerly await for the next chapter of this.

[Maxz]

Great to hear thanks for the response.

[chellyense]

@jvcruz

@Paradox1

I, however, didn’t feel much emotional attachment towards Sadie since her part in the story has been limited till now and consequently her death didn’t instill that sense of emotional distress that I would feel from the death of a plot relevant and endearing NPC. It was well written though. ( Do note, I went the friendship path with her).

It’s so interesting to see some stronger reactions to Sadie from some people; it actually surprised me that some people got attached because I intentionally kind of left them blank. I’ve crafted Sadie as more of a plot/character-building device for the MC, though there will be more vignettes of them in future chapters. I almost don’t want players to get too attached to them, because they are not meant to be a major character. Honestly, your response to Sadie is more of what I expect from readers. I’m hoping to elicit more emotional responses from the main characters you eventually get to know, and I definitely don’t want Sadie to detract from that.

Thank you so much for your feedback! I’m excited to get the next chapter out; I wasn’t expecting as much of a response as I’ve gotten over on tumblr so I almost wish I waited to publish until I finished Ch 1. This has definitely motivated me to wrap that up though. Cheers!

It’s me! I got attached! I’ve been crying over Sadie for the past two days! (No I’m not joking. Those responses MC can give after hunting that bear killed me. ) I may have replayed a lot to go digging for all the interactions you can have with them.

I look forward to meeting the ROs too though.

[Chorn]

So my main confusion, and it’s not like it’s a huge one but it IS there, is why didn’t MC push at all for counter attacking while the King is there? I understand from another comment you want us to understand just how little agency MC has in their life , but this confounds me.

We have just slayed their champion, and I’ll be generous and say a great commander in their own right, and the King has just informed us that THEY are the ones pushing harder for this peace. We have the entire upperhand, and can siege out another city(possibly without even a fight if the enemy morale is low enough/intimidating the city itself to surrender), MC would see the positive momentum building up behind them it’s very hard to try and not argue for attacking to take more. Why accept peace when we can have it all and rid outselves of future wars?

I can see people teying to bring up food shortages or manpower issuses, or just the King putting his foot down and saying his “choice”(Marry or Treason) is final, and I can see this being a completely me issue, but I cant shake this you know?

Like, We’re RIGHT THERE MAN!

But I did enjoy the prologue, and am eager to read more.

[Random_Person]

@jvcruz

, even if the MC wanted to make an heir with the emperor/empress, their spouse would reject them.

Than why want to get married in the first place? The reason monarchs married for peace is because the heir would be a family member and so more trusted in keep the peace instead of declaring war?

[erinrae26381]

I haven’t had a chance to finish playing through the demo just yet, so take my thoughts with a grain of salt, but from what I’ve read on the thread it seems to be that the powers that are arranging this union might not know that the Emperor/Empress will reject sexual advances from their future spouse?

While that may be the ultimate goal of the marriage here, this seems like it’s just an unforeseen impediment to achieving it (the plot may also play out long before bearing a child becomes relevant).

I haven’t seen enough yet to determine whether or not this would even be a society that cares about bloodline in the most literal sense. For all I know, they could be just fine with adoption (as long at the heir’s legitimacy is ratified by the highest authority possible).

Also (and most importantly imo), while I know that I’d be OK having to RP that, not putting players in that incredibly difficult situation on a mental and emotional level is overall a good move.

[jvcruz]

@chellyense

It’s me! I got attached! I’ve been crying over Sadie for the past two days! (No I’m not joking. Those responses MC can give after hunting that bear killed me. ) I may have replayed a lot to go digging for all the interactions you can have with them.

I look forward to meeting the ROs too though.

I’m so delighted and pleasantly surprised that Sadie had such an impact on some players! As sweet as some of those interactions were, they have nothing on what’s to come with the ROs.

[jvcruz]

@Chorn

So my main confusion, and it’s not like it’s a huge one but it IS there, is why didn’t MC push at all for counter attacking while the King is there? I understand from another comment you want us to understand just how little agency MC has in their life , but this confounds me.

These are all good points, and questions the MC has, too. They’re going to have a lot to unpack.
All I can say without spoiling too much is that the MC has been in the dark about a lot of things. They have very much been an unwitting pawn. I’m glad people are asking these questions!

@Random_Person

Than why want to get married in the first place? The reason monarchs married for peace is because the heir would be a family member and so more trusted in keep the peace instead of declaring war?

These are also good questions. As erinrae26381 pointed out here:

@erinrae26381

I haven’t had a chance to finish playing through the demo just yet, so take my thoughts with a grain of salt, but from what I’ve read on the thread it seems to be that the powers that are arranging this union might not know that the Emperor/Empress will reject sexual advances from their future spouse?

While that may be the ultimate goal of the marriage here, this seems like it’s just an unforeseen impediment to achieving it (the plot may also play out long before bearing a child becomes relevant).

Don’t forget that this marriage isn’t the Emperor/Empress’s idea – it’s the King’s. We still haven’t met Wilmot or seen their perspective.

Spoiler tagging since this goes into the themes of this story, and I’m sure a lot of people prefer to be in the dark so they can discover this on their own:

The Emperor/Empress is very much in the closet, and they themselves have had a lack of agency in a lot of this. In fact, I intend for them to be a kind of mirror to the protagonist. All of the main characters in this story have had agency denied them in some way. It will take time for the reader to see the patterns, and each character has a different storyline and resolution.

In short: power can be deceptive and superficial. Sometimes a “leader” is just a symbol, and a symbol is just in place to placate the people.

@erinrae26381

Also (and most importantly imo), while I know that I’d be OK having to RP that, not putting players in that incredibly difficult situation on a mental and emotional level is overall a good move.

I thought so, too! Similarly, I would be okay writing a story like that, but that’s not the story I want to tell here.

Thank you everyone for your feedback!

[erinrae26381]

@jvcruz

Spoiler tagging since this goes into the themes of this story, and I’m sure a lot of people prefer to be in the dark so they can discover this on their own:

The Emperor/Empress is very much in the closet, and they themselves have had a lack of agency in a lot of this. In fact, I intend for them to be a kind of mirror to the protagonist.

I suspected! It’s a meaty theme and I look forward to your exploration of this nothing more that I love than helping characters towards autonomy and self-actualization lol

[elp97]

MCs getting revenge on their whole family. Also am I the only one who notice something going on between MCs sister and Sadie’s sister (forgot her name) ?

[DashingCoward]

With all the talk about the Empress/Emperor, I’m wondering what the succession for them is. We know that our brother and his child are ahead in the line of succession, then there’s our sister and her children, then finally us in terms of the Kingdoms inheritance. But what about the Empire’s?

Since our spouse would reject having an heir with us and as they are gay/lesbian then their lover wouldn’t be able to provide an heir either, so does the bloodline end with them or not?

[Valixon]

@jvcruz finaly had chance to play through the demo and didnt notice any errors in my playthrough so yay for a code victory lol

I believe others have posted some of the thoughts and questions one might have to ask or say so for nowi will unpack my feelings and thoughts later on.

Though i suspect i see some of the unseen things at work or could potentially be thus makes me even more curious to see how things unfold as the story progresses.

So good job on setting the tone that you were going for. Will have more to say for later but for now need to head offline for a bit.

[Cryzhentia]

Emperor probably already have an heir, in my imagination the emperor or empress is way older than MC

[No_This_Is_Patrick]

Read on the Tumblr Emperor/Empress is around late 20s or early 30 or something. They’re not that old basically.

[DashingCoward]

Yeah I read through their tumblr and they state that the emperor/empress is 29 so a year younger than the MC.

[Maugrim]

Loved this I was immediately attached to the tragic love story of my character and Sadie. I especially enjoyed that Alibe and my character became friends, its like they did it to hold on to Sadie’s memory. I am eagerly looking forward to more!

[Zombi3Slayer400]

Hmmm… Is nice.