Aesemyr: The Withering (WIP) [Updated 16 November 2024 - chapter 3]

UPDATE: The first part of chapter three is now playable!


Hello everyone!

In Aesemyr: The Withering (previously named A Rhapsody in Blue ) you play as a mage trying to rein in their erratic powers while embarking on a quest to discover a plot years in the making. Yet as dark clouds gather on the horizon, you quickly realise that the coming storm seems to bring with it something much worse.

Genre: fantasy, adventure, romance

As of now, the demo contains the prologue, chapter zero, chapter one, chapter two and part of chapter three (123k words).

Features
  • Play as a man, woman or non-binary.
  • Customise your appearance and shape your personality.
  • Follow the teachings of a specialised Way and gain access to different skill sets.
  • Find romance with one of the ROs; or choose to stay as friends.
  • Investigate the elven presence in the capital and discover how it relates to the accident that nearly cost you your life.
  • Unearth a secret that might shake the foundations of the kingdom you call home.
  • Protect yourself and those you care about, lest they suffer a bitter end.
  • Retain your hold on your magic; or let it corrupt you beyond repair.
Summary

Magic comes with a price.

That is an inevitability every mage has to face. But when you lose your powers in a freak accident, you are certain that the price has been paid in full.

You settle down in the peaceful countryside, far away from any conflicts or conspiracies, all the while focusing on your recovery. And for two years, your life is quiet.

However, when an untimely visit forces you on a path not of your own choosing and magic itself seems intent on corrupting you, you must once again rely on your training to keep yourself and those you care about safe.

The presence of elves in the capital brings nothing but ill tidings and as yet another storm brews in the distance, you set off on a journey to discover the truth of your accident and a plot that could bring the kingdom to its knees.

The Withering approaches, and with it, a reckoning for all the world.

ROs

Main romances:

Valia Kainen (F, 28)

Having met at the Academy, you’ve known Valia for more than a decade, so it’s no surprise she now occupies the seat of the Academy’s Headmistress - her rise through the ranks often attributed to both her exceptional skills and ruthlessness. Despite her cold exterior, she is mainly driven by love for her family and kingdom.

While she’s no longer the girl you used to know, some things still remain the same; her dislike of you being one of them.

Appearance: Average height and athletic build. Shorter light brown hair that barely touches her chin. Light green eyes. Permanently set jaw and furrowed brows. A small scar across the left eyebrow. Tanned skin.

Lucenis Veldari (M, 32)

As the younger brother of the King, Lucenis tends to keep his distance from royal affairs. He is well-known to the general populace as a poet with a gentle soul and quiet disposition. Though there have been many rumours throughout the years about him and his mother, none have ever been proven true.

He is a good friend of Valia and your twin brother.

Appearance: Tall and lean build. Long dark brown hair that reaches to his mid-back and that usually frames his face as he keeps it loose. Black eyes and warm beige skin with a sickly pallor.

Cerin Melista (M/F, 25)

A part-time librarian and a soon-to-be university professor, Cerin is a person with an outgoing personality and boundless enthusiasm for the things they love, particularly history. Being a passionate collector of ancient relics, they possess a dauntless spirit, which often lands them in dangerous situations.

Appearance: Average height and slim build. Shoulder-length red hair kept in a messy ponytail. Heterochromatic eyes – one is a striking blue, one hazel. A smattering of freckles across the cheeks. Fair skin.

Tevshedi “Tev” Zanue (M/F, 36)

Tev is a well-travelled mercenary and a seasoned warrior that has decided to leave their life of wandering the world behind and instead, work as Lucenis’ personal bodyguard. Good humoured and loyal to a fault, their natural charisma has helped them establish various connections among both the common folk and nobility.

Appearance: On the taller side with a muscular build. Short black hair, coiled. Brown eyes. Dark brown skin. Has a rather nasty scar travelling from their collarbone to their chin.

?? (non-binary, 30)

Several years ago, they came to study at the Academy, their affinity to psychic magic envied by many. Lyyra became their new home, the people they met their new family. They are quick to grin and joke, but their eyes always seem to be haunted by shadows both past and present.


Side romances (= you’ll see them less often than the above characters):

Mara (F, 31)

A silver-masked miracle physician willing to help anyone in need in exchange for utmost secrecy. Nobody is certain of her true identity as she disappears without a trace each day.

?? (M, ??)

An elusive figure that seems to be fascinated with your magical powers.

Other characters

These are major characters that will either appear or be mentioned throughout the story. These include your brother, as well as the team you used to be a part of.

MC’s twin brother

Your younger twin brother, by two minutes. Raised by your father, you both joined the Academy at the age of fourteen when your magic manifested. Since then, you started growing apart as you decided to pursue different fields of study. Unlike you, he chose the path of research, rather than combat; he is quite well known in his circles, mainly for his study of Ruun in connection to translocation.

Appearance: Similar to the MC. Short hair, brushing his ears. Very dark circles underneath his eyes. Faint smile lines around his mouth.

Captain Kal Poita

The captain of your team and someone you could always depend on. Your group is like a family to him and he is very protective of you all, even if it doesn’t feel like it sometimes.

Appearance: Average height, broad shouldered. Close-cropped brown hair. Light brown eyes. Tanned skin. Various small scars on his hands and arms, a scar across the corner of his mouth.

Vera Harwe

Charismatic and always up to no good, Vera liked you from the moment she met you. While she regrets choosing this path in her life and often talks about retiring, she would never abandon any of you.

Appearance: Average height, lean build. Short blond hair, falling into her eyes. Light blue eyes. Fair skin.

Ash Riven

Reckless and seemingly without any regard for their own life, the fun-loving Ash participates in most of Vera’s escapades; except for those that involve too many people, as they tend to shy away from larger crowds and strangers.

Appearance: Tall and lanky. Shoulder-length white hair, kept in a ponytail when needed. Stormy grey eyes. Sharp cheekbones. Very pale skin.

Delos Kyysta

Delos, or “Del” as everyone calls him, is the quiet conscience of the group, with a careful and contemplative nature. Often at odds with Vera, he is all but fed up with the shenanigans his teammates think of.

Appearance: Average height, athletic build. Short curly black hair. Dark brown eyes. Olive skin.

Feedback

Please, let me know if:

  • you catch any mistakes, weird grammar, sentences that don’t make sense (English is not my first language).
  • there are any errors that pop up.
  • you think some paragraphs/pages should be shorter.
  • you would like there to be an extra choice somewhere.

Other than that, I would love to hear what you all think, so don’t hesitate to tell me!

Updates

26/12/22: prologue + chapter zero posted (around 20k words)

09/03/23: part of chapter one posted (7k words)

30/04/23: second part of chapter one posted (around 16k words)

11/07/23: third and final part of chapter one posted (around 9k words)

11/01/24: first part of chapter two posted (around 18k words)

22/08/24: second and final part of chapter two posted (around 17k words)

16/11/24: first part of chapter three posted (36k words)

NEW DEMO: here
Old Demo: here
Tumblr: here
Ko-fi: here

Thank you for reading!

385 Likes

I haven’t checked the demo out yet but I love the title, I’m a huge George Gershwin fan.

Also it took a lot of courage to put yourself out there and posting the demo. So huge kudos on that.

I’m sure that there are quite a bit of authors that have felt the lack of confidence and the anxiety so you aren’t the only one. Stephen King had similar anxiety and low confidence when he first started writing.

I really love the premise of the story, and I will definitely check it out later today.

7 Likes

This was quite good! The plot seems quite promising, can’t wait for more. As a non-native speaker, had you not said it wasn’t your first language I would’ve not guessed as the prose of your writing and overall grammar sounded perfect to me. I wish I could offer more helpful feedback but this is all I can offer…

As someone who is also very anxious, I very much understand how you feel and must commend you on sharing this demo with us all for I’m sure wasn’t an easy step. I hope you’ll have a pleasant experience with having done it.

Regarding the coding issue, do not hesitate to ask for help around the forum. You’ll find that there will always be someone willing to help you out with it :))

4 Likes

I loved it so far, can’t wait to read more :heart:

2 Likes

I loved demo! Waiting to read more!

4 Likes

I love the demo

2 Likes

The save slots are broken

2 Likes

The demo is great! The only negative is that the save slots aren’t working but that isn’t a big deal.

2 Likes

Thanks for letting me know. They should be working now.

Thank you so much, I’m glad you’ve enjoyed it :slight_smile:

2 Likes

Thank you for your kind words :slight_smile:

(Also, Gershwin’s music is great!)

1 Like

Not at all, you taking the time to write a comment is enough of a feedback for me, so thank you! :slight_smile:

Thank you. I think putting the demo here was the right decision, even if it took quite a bit of courage. It’s encouraging to see what people think about what I wrote!

4 Likes

I really really loved the demo so far! A very interesting concept that at least I, personally, feel that I have not come across before in IF. I am very excited to see more! I also really enjoyed your writing style and to be honest, as a native English speaker, I wouldn’t have guessed it wasn’t your first language! I thought that the dream part was well-written in terms of being realistic to the way a traumatic event could have a lasting impact on a person, and all of the choices had options that fit with what I thought the character would feel/do given the history of the MC and my own personal preferences. I am excited to see more of this story, it’s easily taken a place as one of my favorite demos currently!

1 Like

Thank you so much for your feedback. :heart:

I’m also excited to finally get to what happens next and for you to meet some of the characters!

3 Likes

This topic was automatically closed 60 days after the last reply. If you want to reopen your WiP, contact the moderators.

Author requested reopening.

It’s alive?! :heart_eyes:

5 Likes

Yes, still alive and kicking. :joy:

Also back with a short update!

16 Likes

Oh, I love your WIP, it’s awesome!! Even when we didn’t meet the RO’s I love my little brother and the interaction with him were sweet and kind. I like the old lady Mrs. Rivers, she’s an great and kind woman. I hope we can meet her again. I’m looking forward to read more :grinning: :heart:

2 Likes

Thank you. :heart:

I’m glad that you like the characters so far. I promise that you’ll meet the ROs very soon! :wink:

5 Likes

Demo Update: 30 April 2023

Hello.

Part two of chapter one is now up! Continue travelling with your twin, have some overdue conversations and finally, meet some of the ROs!

Before you start playing, please read through the updated content warnings.

Coming next, part three will conclude chapter one with some important stuff happening. :scream:

I hope you enjoy the update! :slight_smile:

Play it here.

25 Likes