A Ruler's Life (WiP)

I’ve begun work on my new game “A Ruler’s Life”. In it, you play a character who grows and matures through complicated moments until you become king/queen/majesty, a position from which you must stabilize the kingdom and, incidentally, your life. Only to discover later that an even worse evil is coming.

Currently it’s about (7~10%, 1 Chapters, 10862 Words excluding command lines) done, and I plan on updating every 3 or 4 weeks.

Where the demo currently ends: In the part where you choose where to go with Zeld and your brother. The lake is the only half done option.

To play the demo, go here: https://dashingdon.com/play/jack-arcan-miller/kings-life/mygame/

I know it sounds generic and simple at first glance, but that’s because I’m the kind of writer who develops the story as I write it. Also, I don’t want to give away too much of the plot.

I would love to receive your criticism and be active in this forum, but I warn that I will not tolerate disrespectful or directly aggressive and negative people. If you want to give advice go ahead, but always be careful with the way you do it, respecting that I am a person with a life and I may not have the same opinion as you or I may not be sensitive to the same topics as you.

To finish, I’m a Spanish guy and I don’t speak English natively, so I can make spelling mistakes and I would love that if you see any you tell me about it. I am a college student, bisexual and with a gender identity not very clear to be honest. I hope we get along well and I am looking forward to see your opinions regarding my work.

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I think it might help you to get readers, If you change the word king to king/queen/majesty so that everyone can see, that your game is Not genderlocked at all. By reading the description, I first thought it was. I Go reading again, Just wanted to mention it directely. I like the style that makes me feel directely in the story itself.

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I think someone already got the idea and the title is The Sword of Rivenia by Nuteelaqueen.

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Gotta agree with above. Id call it something like ‘A Monarchs Life’ or ‘A Rulers Life’ instead of a Kings Life. Also use ‘They’ when writing the description instead of he.

Also there can be multiple games about becoming a ruler, dont be put of because someone else has a story with the same basic premise

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That doesn’t mean he can’t write this story. She doesn’t own the rights to the genre, so anyone is free to write their own story.

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If I may I would like to use your suggestion ‘A Rulers Life’ until I have a better title.

From the beginning this was a provisional title, but now that you’ve pointed that out, I think I’m going to look for another one as soon as possible, even if it’s still provisional. You are absolutely right that, the plot being what it is, simply saying “king” is not correct. Thank you!

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No problem, sure go ahead. You could also go for something different like ‘Your Majesty’. But I’m terrible at naming things

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Does the Demo end before you get to the forest, or was that an mistake? From what I read the game is pretty nice, I only found 1-3 mistakes mostly with the pronouns, when your Mom teaches you to avoid Percy the text First Said she and then suddenly he in the next sentences.

But I really like what I have read so far.

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I don’t think he meant it in a bad way, I think he was just pointing out that someone else is doing something similar and used it to show an example of an inclusive title. Either way I’m not going to lose motivation just because someone else has done something similar, but thanks for caring!

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Oh I did not know. Thanks

I am glad that there is another Spaniard writer here. I wish you the best.

I recommend if you have an estimated number of Romantic options, you put a summary in the Original post because many people main point to trying a wip demo is knowing the Romance options they could find.

So having a small summary of romance that will be available for readers could attract readers.

Edit If you have any questions about anything, You just can pm me.

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Yes, for now the demo only has the lake and there are some options left to finish on that road. The other two options, the forest and the mayor’s house, I plan to do them later, starting with the forest. As for the pronouns, it is true that is where I make more mistakes, besides that keeping track of the sex of each character is sometimes complicated. I’ve already fixed the mistakes you mention and others I’ve found in the process, thanks!

I hadn’t thought about it but I’m going to look at how others do it and try to add it, although for now I only have one romance in mind and another one that I still have to develop, but thanks for the suggestion.

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Sounds interesting

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This looks interesting!! Looking forward to seeing how you’ll make this premise your own.

A comment I have is that, unless you judge it necessary, I wouldn’t necessarily let the player choose the names of all our family – or at least if we do, maybe spread it out a bit. The way the game is currently set up, there’s several screens of just name choices one after the other, and I found it a bit repetitive.

Also a heads-up that save slots are currently not working :slight_smile:

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Had an error here when choosing to go to the forest option

Yeah, I’m not too proud of how that part looks. On one hand I’ve thought about removing it and just putting the names myself, or even just calling them “father”, “mother” and “grandfather” (that’s probably what I’m going to do in the end). On the other hand I want the reader to establish an emotional bond with them and I think that deciding their names helps. If I leave the part about choosing their names in the end, I’ll probably change how you do it to make it more enjoyable.

They should work now, thanks for the heads up.

Yes, that part is not implemented yet, it’s the one I plan to do after the lake, and the file related to the forest was empty, but I didn’t know that caused an error. I have already put a “work in progress” warning and it should not crash.

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This is an interesting demo. And I agree with Mara, adding the Romance Options and their brief descriptions to the Original Post would be a lot better, most people that comes for romance looks for those.

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Nice undertale reference :+1:

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Oh, a new WIP!
I have nothing to say abou the story since the demo is very short. But, I already love the personality system you had in the game.

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