Mc lost their father also.
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I can’t wait until I can release more information about that project. If you wanna know a bit more about it, here’s the link to the interest check thread in the Adult Interest Check Thread https://forum.choiceofgames.com/t/adult-interest-check-thread/57535/154?u=viisbae
I wouldn’t worry too much about that. I normally try to round out every chapter and every part of a chapter as a full scene at the very least. So there won’t be any “But… that means the killer… it has to be-! To be continued…” I like to try to have every scene able to stand on its own, and if anything, be complimented by other scenes that have already happened. I’m not a huge fan of cliffhangers either, which is why each book will also be able to stand on its own, with a small scene to set up the next book with nicely and allude to future antagonists.
Those are major props, thank you LOL Two of the most heavy hitting series on the platform, gee whiz. Certainly gives me hope that I’m doing the story and material justice!
Also true! That will certainly have a touching scene that deals with it, definitely next game for sure, but possibly this game if it feels right as well.
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I would say it does characters better than Wayhaven. In that respect, I think it’s more like FH, too (so maybe 60/40?).
The characters’ behaviors aren’t so over the top that you’re left rolling your eyes. They are more like real people (though, admittedly, I haven’t played Sam’s route, so I’m not sure about that one). And the MC doesn’t feel useless, despite their lack of actual abilities. Not yet, anyway.
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Something I definitely wanted to get right was the balance of the MC being a useful addition to the team without making them all seem like they don’t know what they’re doing, but also giving the rest of the team a spotlight without overshadowing the MC. So I shall continue to try and keep that balance!
S. Ryder is certainly the one that most people go for, so honestly a bit refreshing to hear that LOL But, they are also the one with the most trauma this time around for sure. I had to take more than a few breaks while writing their solo scene after the event in chapter 3.
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Yeah Wayhaven is more romance/flirt/jokes and lightheartedness which is fine but the story bruh is lacking. In fact I was at the Fallen Hero Retribution thread discussing this and got in huge trouble, with some fangirls and got my replies flagged lol when I mentioned this.
Also yes when trauma and struggling characters are involved the characters become more “believable” and personal which is why I like The Bureau which reminded me of The Exile WIP and Fallen Hero.
I can’t wait for this game to finish but I am confused how its 500k words so far which is just less than half of Fallen Hero 2, it doesn’t feel as long imo.
Also in regards to MC comparison yeah Wayhaven’s MC is damsel in distress which is fine if its used properly in a good story (getting kidnapped, being physically and mentally weak but refusing help, getting hurt a lot, taking risky life threatening solutions to beat the bad guy) , the exact opposite of an OP MC is even worse like Superman lol.
I do have an idea, why not make the MC of The Bureau share the same first name just with a different first letter as C opposed to K as their predecessor to elicit more trauma and/or have scene where the MC’s get harmed by their druggie brother who wants money.
Just some ideas lol
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You know me. I’m a Carter girl all the way. 
I have yet to try anyone else. When I replay the demo, it’s always Carter. 
Still working my MC out for him, too, so I can use that excuse. I may try one of the others later with my generic MC, if I can resist the pull of Special Agent Lance…
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Oh Sam/Sarah is the most liked one? interesting as they do have the most trauma. Dramatic and Traumatic characters are well liked as opposed to easygoing whatever characters like Kristina I guess.
Elizabeth and Harper are my favourites for sure.
Also will this game contain naughty scenes like in Wayhaven 2 or Fallen Hero Retri? or will it be a slowburn? I am laughing at the thought of doing bedroom stuff and finding out that Elizabeth/Harper got matching tattoos and piercings bahahaha
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This is just a matter of; I really suck at coding LMAO That, on top of the fact that I really do change the smallest of things based on the weirdest variables, so there are a some passages that just have a few words changed based on previous choices, and some whole scenes that are completely different with pretty much nothing copy and pasted from their counterparts. An example of this is MC height. If you have a short MC in the makeout session with Special Agent Lance, their arm gets put above your head, otherwise they just look you in the eyes. Another one with Special Agent Lance is, if you deny their advances on the train, then get jealous in front of their hotel room, then deny their advances when leaving their hotel room, they’ll stop and try to have a conversation about where your relationship stands. But that is only if you pick those specific choices in that specific order.
EDIT: Forgot to mention one thing. If you code dive the game, you won’t find a single *fake_choice… because there isn’t one LOL That’s about how much I learned how to code
So TL;DR - I suck at coding and lots of different variations of the same scenes.
Depending on the character you choose to romance, there will be somewhat spicy scenes you can choose to fade to black from, but they won’t go into super explicit detail or anything. Probably just as much as Wayhaven went into detail about theirs.
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Wayhaven 2 M route and and Fallen Hero Retri went to some explicit details with the option to fade in black also.
I am definitely itching for more flirty and naughty scenes especially with all 4 characters commenting on each other. Maybe a hangout at the bar where everyone gets drunk maybe haha
Also are you considering a love triangle route like Wayhaven or a poly route like FH:R?
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Unfortunately not. I already have a lot to code in as is and keep track of. I’m also going to be completely transparent and say I wouldn’t know the first thing about pulling of a poly romance and doing it justice. The last thing I’d want to do is tread on other people’s preferences and portray it completely inaccurately. I may add it to later book series when I’ve had more time to research it and talk to people who are in polyamorous relationships though.
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I understand, poly relationships can be more complex. Wayhaven has a love triangle route based on jealousy, Fallen Hero Retri has a poly where you just flirt and makeout with different characters and they reciprocate for eg Sidestep/Ortega/Argent all like each other while in The Passenger you can date flirt with 2 characters and romance them both and spend time together with the 2 girls.
Overall how every author handles it is different and yeah it becomes more complex for the author to do the coding haha. A lot of people like having the option of having their MC be a hoe and romance everyone haha
Some prefer monogamy also so you can’t please everyone haha.
That being said you can always stick with monogamy for the first game and consider the next game differently.
Overall good luck on the first game, can’t wait to wait for the finished product soon.
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First scene of Chapter 4 is RELEASED!
Hey everyone, the first scene of Chapter 4 is officially out and playable! This is a bit of a shorter one (only about 10k words of new content), bringing the average playthrough up to about 46,000 words. I ran the demo through randomtest and quicktest, so there shouldn’t be anything wrong with it, but YOU WILL NEED TO START FROM THE BEGINNING! Old saves will most likely unfortunately not work due to added variables in a past scene.
This update will have you meeting back up with the MCT and holding a meeting discussing the new information to come from the ongoing case, and what the game plan going forward for the team is. I will most likely be adding the case reports to the options menu after the main game is finished and I go back and add a bunch of stuff to it.
That being said, I don’t imagine chapter 4 taking me more than a couple months to complete, especially when summer rounds the corner. BUT CHAPTER 5, OH BOY!
OH BOY!
I just did the math in my head and, for chapter 5, there will be a total of 24 different scenes, because there are 6 scenes each with 4 different variations. But that’s to cry about at some point in the future, not necessarily right now. For now, enjoy the update everyone!
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Nice update! For what it’s worth, my oldest save worked fine–it was from right before questioning Fiona.
Whoever the murderer is… well that’s one sick SOB. I like that you weave in some fun with all the heavy emotion and gross murders. The Carter/MC exchange about getting a room cracked me up. You capture their hot chemistry really well.
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I suppose the save files are only going to break for people who pick a specific choice in Hawks’ hotel room, then. Essentially, there’s an option you only get to notice something during the debrief if you talked about the case to Hawks in the previous scene.
Very glad to hear it! I feel like that scene as a whole is something I’m going to return to and write more options for in terms of reactions before final release, so it’s nice to hear the ones currently written hit the mark.
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Do I need to use a new link? It was just what I played last time. And I made sure to start from the beginning
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The same link should still be working. Is it not working for you currently?
FINALLY, I have time to play this update! \o/
And since my save got eaten since last time…
Here we go again, all the way from the start
Summary
Affected, not Effected.
You’re
“momentum of their attacks”. Also, I THINK that, to get the tense right, in that second sentence it should be “they had worn themselves out”
Slightly confused: you say in the OP that Kris is the oldest, but here you say they’re “younger-looking”:
“where it reaches”
Is this supposed to be “tolls”? Otherwise, could you tell me what it means, as I’m not familiar with the expression?
That’s not tension, you doofus MC, it’s Ryder making sure they don’t set the headrest, seat, and entire car on fire.
Professor Paws gets me every time. 
That possessive should be after “loved” - the subject is “person she loved”:
Uncapitalised pronoun.
You forgot to bold this part: EDIT: In the interest of not making this post even longer (too late!), the locator for this scene isn’t bolded in any of its pages.
Related to the bolded locators, I personally find it a bit disconcerting to have them when there isn’t a scene change (e.g., both of the pages before to this one have it, even though they’re the same scene). May I ask why you decided to do it that way?
“he gets spotted”
You got an * at the end of this, which makes me think that you meant to put one at the start as well, to italicise it? Either that, or the * was a mistype.
I THINK this paragraph is meant to be italicised as well?
“were”. The subject here is “globs” not “blood” (or “it”)
Something off here: I think your brain was undecided between “wasn’t breathing” and “her breathing wasn’t steady at all” and went whynotboth.gif.
Goddamn you, you just went all out in trying to traumatise me by proxy with Sarah’s route, didn’t you?
Either I’m misremembering, or there’s a math hiccup: when Jareau stabbed Kate, Hawks shot him twice, Ryder thrice, that’s five. You mention 12 bullets here, so that’s seven post-mortem shots, not nine:
Ooooof, “I started with one in the chamber…”
“dump site”
Aaaand that’s the end, right before hitting the coroner. Always great, always can’t waiting for more. 
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Thanks so much for all of the spelling errors/mistakes as always! Often times I’m dead tired while writing so having those pointed out definitely helps (sight instead of site; damn I must’ve been exhausted lmao).
That is because their mutation stops them from aging, along with other side effects as well. So, while they’re over 40 years old, they look like they’re about 21-22, as that is what age they were when The Pulse hit.
This particular choice is to draw attention to the top of the page so that people never have to infer where the current scene is taking place before continuing to read during the flashback portions. It’s really just a preference choice.
Ooooooh yeah. I can’t wait until I write the extra scene about ${sar}'s past and the small story about how Jackie adopted adopted them. I also have just realized I used my code language for them there, which… I mean I’m just gonna keep that there because that’s really funny that I just defaulted to that.
Glad you enjoyed it as always!
EDIT: Even now I use ‘right’ instead of ‘write’. This is just proof of a long inferred, harsh reality… I’m always tired
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It is working! At least it stops right after being assigned the new case
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When the author is actively spoiling his own story lmao. Also great work on the update. The Bureau is definitely my favourite so far as for WIPs on here, my other is The Exile which has no discussion thread or updates 
I also have noticed that in scenes where we get a choice to go with 2 groups of the team its usually Hawks dictating instead of the MC saying, I suggest changing that part so instead of Hawks saying “MC you go with Harper and me” we get a choice of we we want to go to like “I’m gonna go with you and Harper”, it makes the MC more of an “active” character instead of a passive one, avoid passive main characters that gets pushed by the story.
Besides we get more potential for us making a decision and the other characters commenting on it, for eg in Wayhaven and Fallen Hero if we make a choice other characters comment on it with Farah in Wayhaven or Ortega in Fallen Hero making funny comments.
Also as for social stats I would suggest adding a “sarcastic” or “rude” option as it tends to be funny and popular, arguments and banter within the main characters make for a better story, if they all nicely get along it becomes less interesting emotionally.
Don’t forget to make a good story and villain my G, don’t make Wayhaven’s mistakes lol. Keep up the great work G I definitely enjoy this game 
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