Hmm, that’s a very unique power. I like it! It’s kind of too OP if you can manipulate your opponents blood, but it can work if we add some restrictions to it. I’ll add it to the list thanks!
Or maybe use your opponents blood to heal or something. I can work with this.
Sure! I’ll add it as well. Thanks for the request.
I really enjoyed reading this IF! I think you’ve got a good thing going here, and I can’t wait to read more. Also, thanks for adding the choice to play as a female character as well! I do have some comments though:
When you play a female character, the NPCs will quite often refer to you as male. Examples: your father calls you son when giving you the necklace, the man in charge of the orphanage calls you boy and the knights at the academy keep referring to you as lad. Your friend at the orphanage calls you Zizou for some reason as well. Also, a few conversations don’t take into account that you and Lea are both girls. When meeting Lea for the first time, the MC mentions that it’s odd to see a girl wanting to be a knight but that she has no problems with it, and I think this is just a remnant from when the IF was gender-locked. At one point you can tell Lea that “girls usually don’t like getting their hands dirty” or that you “had no idea that girls could fight like that”, which also sounds like something that would be said by a boy.
The build customization only allows you to pick a slender or curvy body, all the other options are grayed out. Perhaps this is intentional? Also, there is no option to pick brown eyes.
There are a few inconsistencies that occur throughout the story. My MC didn’t steal any food from the guards, and yet it’s mentioned later on that she dropped stolen bread in the lake. She also mentions not wanting to be found out as a thief if she has to go back. Another inconsistency occurs when you get your exam results. The first page after completing the exam shows your results, but even if you get 100% the next page will show the MC being nervous when talking to Lea about it. I think the order of events should just be swapped here. The knight overseeing your fight with Jirell says that Jirell could’ve killed the MC with the sword despite the fact that he dropped it to use his fists instead. Lastly, I picked the option to tie the headband around the ankle but the text still refers to it being tied around the forehead or arm when you talk to Lea.
Correct me on this, but are we always meant to lose the fight against Jirell? I couldn’t really understand the stats and what options they correspond to, and no matter what I picked I always lost in the end.
My final observation is about Jirell’s characterization. I hope this part doesn’t come across in the wrong way, but to be honest, I really can’t stand him and I don’t understand his character at all. It’s mentioned that he is full of hate towards everyone and everything and that he only cares about himself, but he’s never as openly rude to anyone else as he is to the MC (from what has been seen so far). His hate comes across as extremely personal, and I feel that there isn’t even a reason for him to hate on the MC this much. I would imagine him as a vengeful and aloof but not outright aggressive character unless there is some kind of justification. Yes, he is pretty traumatized due to his past, but I still don’t think it justifies how he acts around the MC. When he pulls on her hair, he only feels slightly bad if you pick the option to cry. I really hope I don’t have to play a character that has to act meek to get him to warm up eventually. None of the other characters call him out on his bullshit either, only if the MC decides to talk back… But they are both told to quit it, despite that he is being the aggressor. And why is he constantly nearby if he hates her so much? Finally, at the end when he saves the MC and Lea from the other boys I was even more confused by him. I got the impression that he should be feeling great joy if the MC has to go back. Or did he save them only because Lea was there too? Or was this action an extremely convoluted way of saying “I take pity on you”? Now I feel like the MC owes him, which makes the situation even worse. At this point, I feel like he has no redeemable qualities. I know it’s still very early in the story, but I don’t see him getting much sympathy with this kind of introduction.
Anyway, I’m sorry that this got so long, and I hope my thoughts came across as constructive. I wish you good luck with your writing!
I love your feedback. Thanks for pointing out these that I might have missed.
Yes, there seems to be some lingering refrences from when it was gender locked. I thought I corrected them all but these few missed me.
The body build was intentional, as I imagined there would be different ways to describe the bodies based on gender and what features they normally have. Though some of these describing words cam be used for females also.
The nervousness is based on your personality. So if you choose shy or nervous options it will affect your response to certain things. The arm placement is an error on my part, apologies. It will be fixed.
I don’t want to spoil the fight, but based on your stats and your opponents stats the fight could be difficult or easy.
I love that you were able to share your thoughts on the character. Yes, he was meant to be a pain and someone that would really tick you off. And it is up to you if you want to make friends or enemies with him, no butt kissing will be involved in trying to befriend one of the characters so no worries.
As for if he can change, hmmm. We’ll just have to wait and see lol.
Thanks for such a detailed response. I really enjoyed reading it as it’s interesting to see what others think of the characters. Plus I totally missed some of these errors.
No problem! 
I suppose that I’ll have to experiment more with the options then.
You certainly succeeded with that! I do admit I’m very curious about him despite that he pisses me off. I have some very conflicting feelings haha.
Ahh the suspense!
We haven’t interacted with Kelly yet so I can’t say much about him, but Lea is best girl for sure.
A whopping 22 personality stat! Probably too many stats which ends up too much additional works for you to keep it relevant and reflecs mc character narrative in the story. Will also makes personality stats shallow because too many works makes you unconciously cutting corner in making personality stat matters. If personality stat just a stat decorations which doesnt reflects narratives at all, probably just remove it altogether or make sub menu for personality stats just to make main stat page less clutter.
Are you saying the stats are too many for the player to keep track of?
If so, then you may be right about that. The stats page itself if already full of information tbh, but the sub menu thing sperate from the main stats sounds like a great idea.
First of I got this error on one of the female dialogue options, no idea if you can see the screenshots.
Next, no matter what gender, body type, or any of the choices I made the stats were all locked-(here’s what the stats looked like in case it helps.)
Hey thanks for letting me know. For the stats your gender and body type doesn’t affect your stats, but now that you mentioned it that does sound like a good idea. Currently, you have to train to increase the stats but as the story progresses we’ll get there early on.
As for Jirell, he’s just a hard nut to crack lol. I’ll fix the first error.
Hey guys, I’m almost finished with chapter four, so it will drop between today and tomorrow. I decided to assign a set of default powers that you can use, but if you want to get other powers you’ll have to hunt element scrolls to get them, sort of like a pokemon, but you are the pokemon and the trainer in one lol.
Here is the link with the new update guys! It took me a while because I had to hunt and fix some bugs and errors, but it’s finally here.
https://dashingdon.com/play/matt-fusin-/hs-tales-/mygame/
Let me know what you guys think of the powers and the new combat system
Oh ! Here’s just a careful note. When you reach boss fights, please save your game before you fight an opponent whose stats are greater than yours by a lot. The game is getting long, so restarting isn’t that fun.
Hey everyone! Just wanted to drop some info for those of you who are either loving the game and anticipating more, or just find it interesting and is willing to play it. The game has a long slow burn story that I ended up splitting into three segment, or sequels, that will follow after this, the first.
This segment follows the grand plot of a famous tournament that your MC can participate in. The second segment will follow the plot of a war breaking out across the world, and the third will be a medieval apocalyptic setting following the aftermath of the war. There is a lot more than just these simple plots, but I feel I would only spoil the story by telling you guys now.
I do have a question though. I wanted to add some imagery(picture art) and even background sounds to the WIP, but I’m not sure if you guys would like it or not. Would you guys like to see have imagery, like character portraits and drawings of the world’s infrastructre/environment?
Yes of course, especially character portraits lol
I love this. I tend to choose the unnoticeables (in the demo for The Thousand of Us I chose super intelligence) because…well, everyone flies or shoots lasers out of their nostrils or has super strength or whatever. I want to be that one that’s ENTIRELY under the radar.
Imagine the confusion when no one thinks you have an ability, but when you walk into a room neither does anyone else.
As long as you include an option to turn off the art/images, I don’t care.
Hey that sounds pretty cool! I’ll definitely add it as a choosable ability. You have me some good ideas for it too. Thanks!
Glad you agree! I’ll make it an option that you can choose to have still, in case others don’t like it.
Loved the new update! When I got to the end I was like “that’s it?” 
I’m really hooked! I’m slowly warming up to Jirell, but it will take a lot more to forgive him for his earlier shenanigans haha.
I like the powers, but perhaps you could go for a more descriptive style of combat? For example, in the fight against Jirell we could pick a certain option and it would be described how the MC fights, but in the fight against the beast it was like entering a turn-based battle in the style of the old Final Fantasy games (“You attack and do some damage!” or “You miss!”). Although, if this is the style you want to go for, it’s totally fine! I personally just prefer the descriptive style more while reading a story like this.
I also encountered a bug in the beast fight. I picked the visual scroll and immediately activated the Shougen and the fight sequence went like this: teleport to attack weak spot → throw stone → run and kick → run and punch, and once I selected run and punch again I got this error: “lion line 59: No selectable scenes”.
I would also recommend that you place a checkpoint before the fight that we can go back to if we lose (since we can actually die in the fight). I’m recommending this because as far as I know, there is no save system to use once the game is published, which could make it very frustrating having to restart the whole thing. It could end up being a big problem in the long run if you plan to have a bunch of scenes where the MC can die. Another thing you could do instead of having the character die is to use the loss in a narrative way - perhaps we get a wound with a stat loss, or a wound that is only cosmetic which other characters can comment on? Another example could be that instead of dying, the entity who gave us the power saves us, but warns us that there won’t be a next time. Of course, this doesn’t mean that there can’t be certain fights where the MC could possibly die, I would personally just try to limit these scenarios so that the potential deaths are actually impactful. There are a lot of ways you can play around with this, though it might be more complicated coding-wise.
I’m going to say yes to all of this, but as the previous commenters mentioned we should have an on/off toggle.
Hey thanks for the detailed feedback! I really appreciate that you took the time to write all of this, and as usual, it was a fun read with some really great suggestions.
Lol, poor Jirell. He has a lot of atonement to do indeed. I’m glad you’re having fun btw. I’ll start releasing a bit faster then.
So you know about the good ol’ FF games huh?
Cool! That’s exactly what I was trying to mimic. That turn based RPG style, but I figure the descriptive fights are more immersive, so you are correct. I will only use the turn based format for basic fights with thieves and bandits that you will be able to randomly run into when you travel, but for other fights I’ll brink back the descriptive one then.
As for the lion line error, I assure you it will be fixed. Oh, I’m glad you like the powers! I have like this pokemon type idea where you can hunt element scrolls to acquire new powers, but for players who love the dark side, I’ll also add that you can kill other Chikaras and take their powers, but the consequences will be hefty if you are caught.
Some of these powers though I’m worried about, as some of them are too OP and might make the game too easy. For example, right now you’re using the basic form of the Shougen, but when it’s evolved it might be a little too OP. Are you guys fine with an OP character, or do you want more of a challenge?
