Uprising against the Verdant Lords (small update 12/9)


#1

Small update as of 12/9 (just after midnight, so your timezone may vary)

Basically, I’ve gotten a little further in the first scene, and I’ve developed a system for generating a name in the KuLaghuna language or a neighboring steppe language. The character name isn’t yet in the actual story so I have a choice at the very beginning where you may test name generation, or just go directly to the story itself. If you test name generation, the story will follow.

At the current point, I’ll be most curious to know if there’s anything you want to say or ask where it leaves off.

The tiny amount I have so far is visible here: https://dashingdon.com/play/tssl/uprising-against-the-verdant-lords--the-village-years/mygame/

I’d say the genre is roughly fantasy, in that it takes place at a vaguely Medieval level of technology, and not in Earth history. It is, however, magic-agnostic, in that most characters would generally believe in spirits and magic, but you character will be able to be as skeptical or faithful as you wish. I’m also aiming to portray a setting that doesn’t correspond to any particular Earth culture, but has a distinct flavor of its own. I’ll want to know how well I do in this regard.

As for the plotline, you will start out as a peasant. You live in the region of Laghuna, which is part of a republic which I still need to name. This republic is, however, dominated by wealthy people from the region of Kuthumikha. There will be a civil war in which a man claiming descent from the former royal line of Laghuna launches an uprising. The main character will end up caught up in all this (as will basically everybody in Laghuna), and have to make their way through the chaos. You should be able to choose whom you wish to support. There will also be a pair of nearby foreign powers who get involved.

(I think the closest historical analogues are probably something like the fall of a Chinese dynasty [in terms of general collapse], the Social Wars in Roman history [in terms of some of the issues involved], and the 30 Years’ War [in terms of warfare and foreign involvement, though not the religious aspects].)

My goal will be to write a non-grim story in a grim setting. I’d want to respect that terrible things are happening, but also to show people striving, supporting one another, and finding moments of joy. (And sometimes just having fun!)

It might be nice to enter this for the contest. We’ll see how it goes.

The first scene takes place when the main character is seven (though I could adjust this if the age feels off). I plan to spend some time in the village, building the character, getting to know the setting, and watching the build up to the civil war itself.

The title is provisional. “Verdant Lords” refers to republic’s rulers, because they look back to the ancient republic known as the Verdant Realm.

Any questions about the setting will be useful (though I realize people will have more to discuss once I have the first scene up). If I know the answer, I will gladly tell; if not, it is either an opportunity for me to develop the answer or to note that it is an area I should work on.

I look forward to having more to show you. Thank you for your interest :slight_smile:


#2

I’ll be here to help support you. The Social Wars in Roman History is an interesting time not much is tied to those anymore.

I know a lot of history so let me know if I can help.


#3

Thank you. The main similarity there is having a republic which does not give rights to a conquered area, where wealthy people belonging to the dominant group are moving in and making things difficult for the people they took over. So Kuthumikha would have a role similar to Rome, and Laghuna would have one akin to the Italian allies.


#4

Okay, I didn’t even get particularly far into the first scene, but I think I may as well give you a link to what I do have.

https://dashingdon.com/play/tssl/uprising-against-the-verdant-lords--the-village-years/mygame/

Just… note that I’ve only written to the second choice, and I haven’t written the consequences of the second choice yet. It’s very much setting the scene.

You can check out what I have on the stats page, though :slight_smile: I haven’t firmed up yet on whether this is what I want to track, exactly.


#5

I already think this will interesting,summary and short wip is nice so far☺(and I love big family😀)


#6

I really like: [quote]
Grandmother: She rules the family with a firm but loving hand.

Mother: She enjoys playing with you.

Father: He wants to share the world with you.

Big Brother: He thinks you’re annoying.

Big Sister: She thinks you’re a little monster.

Little Brother: He cries a lot.[/quote]

Its perfect for 7 years old. Can’t wait to torture older sister more… instead of mud flinging can we put a mud crawler down her top? That would be something a little sister would do :slight_smile:


#7

I enjoyed it so far :wink:The stats screen is making my mouth water ~ (look at all em stats!)


#8

I like it so far very interesting


#9

I’m disappointed. There isn’t even one single cute guy for me to crush over, be devastated when he dies/turns out to be straight, and then pester you about for the rest of the story. I mean, otherwise, it looks like a good start, but it’s still missing the most important part. :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:


#10

You want a crush at 7 years old?


#11

I was more making fun of myself and the author, and how we generally approach these games. I’m okay with letting the MC grow a bit (and, you know, get a gender and a name) before he actually gets a crush.


#12

The summary sounds intriguing! I like the writing so far and the tone fits the age :slight_smile:


#13

Thank you to everyone who’s commented :slight_smile: I do appreciate it all.

Thanks!

I should probably note that I don’t have any siblings, so if the sibling relationship dynamics ever seem off, don’t hesitate to say anything.

There’s some other family members living with you: Grandfather, an aunt, her husband, their two children, and a more distant relative. But I though that might be too much for the stats page.

I didn’t know you were a little monster, Eiwynn :stuck_out_tongue: (so far that’s the only opinion that changes based on your actions).

I was picturing the character not getting too close to her, but I’ll definitely keep your request in mind for further pranking. Maybe I’ll eventually go back and revise the original scene for additional taunt-related options.

Glad you like those :slight_smile:
I’m wondering whether I should consider splitting stats between different screens at all. How much is too much?
I’m also thinking of including a setting info page, but I want to see how well the story stands for itself first.

You’ll be in luck, then :smiley:
Trying to be as vaguely unspoilery as possible, some people will die, sometimes unavoidably* and sometimes with a chance of rescue. There will even (gasp) be some heterosexuals.

But maybe you’ll like one of the bi or gay guys and he won’t die on you. We can hope :laughing:

*If anyone turns out to be a Tommy, I might be persuadable.

What do you mean, “we?” :unamused:

:thinking: …okay, yeah, that’s fair :stuck_out_tongue_winking_eye:


#14

Well, sibling dynamics go like this (completely unbiased):
Eldest siblings (especially brothers) are the most awesome, amazing people ever. Younger siblings are annoying little brats. :grin:

:anguished:

:fearful:

:scream:

Oh, well, that’s okay then. :grin:


#15

Sibling can be pretty annoying,can be super awesome and can be loyal supporters it’s all depends on how they like it or not(of course it’s also depends on you too),but 1 thing about sibling that very important that they are the one when you don’t have anyone to share,to ask,and to support you(and as for me and my 2 little brother are pretty good,they lovely and caring😊)


#16

A couple of guideline hints here to help you out:

1: Children often reflect their parents’ behavior towards their siblings. Loving parents tend to have children who show each other love - opposites occur too.

2: Age differences between siblings matter a lot. My two sisters had a big gap in age with me - they treated me much more maturely and with more maternal inclined actions then my brother who was closer in age to me.

3: Older children are often brought up stricter with more rules and oversite - the parents learn from them and are more lax and loose with younger siblings.

4: Younger children always get the hand-me-downs.

5: There is always something idiotic your sibling will do - no matter how much you love them.

I got away with a lot. I was the youngest.

But my brother had it stuck in his mind that I was an awful driver and he convinced the entire family of that so I was never allowed to drive, if someone else could. Not even my own car :person_with_pouting_face: So when I actually did have a crash - I never heard the end of it. ever. :frowning:


#17

Can we also choose to support either one of them?

Presumably it is also a “noble” republic with starkly restricted franchise possibly being limited to just rich men or wealthy people from the dominant ethnic group, eh? In any case the mc being a peasant probably has no place in politics at all.


#18

I have to say it seems like a good idea. I can’t wait to see what you do with the story. Also I felt this was a little off.

Big Sister looks over them. “Probably someone went trapping or berry-picking. Or, sure, there’s always traders passing through. Or wandering seers. They look a day or two old, anyway.” You notice, however, that she’s clutching her knife in her right hand.

It’s right before you chose your second choice. "Probably someone went trapping or berry picking. Or, sure, there’s always traders passing through. Or a wandering seer.

Would it be better like this? “probably someone went trapping or berry picking, or there’s always the random trader passing through, maybe even a seer.”


#19

So, I’m trying to figure out what I ought to call the wealthy elites of the republic. @idonotlikeusernames used the term noble, which may work, but I wonder if it has too much of an implication of European-style landed gentry? The elites in this republic generally maintain their status by holding monopolies rather than owning land (which mostly belongs to the communities). I could call them plutocrats, maybe? There isn’t much social mobility… there’s always aristocrats or oligarchs… I don’t know, what sounds appropriate but isn’t confusing?

Ah. I take it you are a younger brother, then :grin:

As far as people dying, I mean, we got war, we got disease, we got famine and starvation, we got bandits and raiders, we got heavy-handed oppression people, so I mean really, what isn’t killing people?

I’ll be writing loving parents. I’m having trouble putting it into words, but I feel like the narrative works better if I start from a place of love, rather than introducing someone from an already broken home into a breaking world.

How old does Big Sister seem so far? I’d like to know how I’m doing with this.

Very yes. Especially without spinning wheels or modern looms.

Big Sister would have you know that she’s perfect and you’re the little monster.

Fortunately, horses are more self-aware :horse: and you’re not that far away from the steppe zone. There are lots of horses in Laghuna.

I got a little bit into essay mode answering @idonotlikeusernames, so I’m sticking this under an arrow. If you’d rather learn this stuff as the story goes along, don’t open it; if you want the infodump now, open it. (It’s not spoilers, though.)

[details=Foreign Relations and Government System][quote=“idonotlikeusernames, post:17, topic:21980”]
Can we also choose to support either one of them?
[/quote]

Probably. Courting them as allies is something I definitely was planning, though.

For a rough idea of the situation, which will be easier to explain once I actually name them (and then figure out whether I’m giving the names in KuLaghuna or their own language), the empire to the northwest used to rule the whole area of the republic until nearly two centuries ago, when they had a major collapse. Now that they have a resurgence, they covet the area, but they also have had a good historical relationship with the royal line of Laghuna, because they descend from the governors the empire appointed before the collapse. So the empire may just want to invade, or they could be persuaded to side with the rebels, but it’d be pretty difficult to get them to side with the republic.

The empire to the center north has only been a power for the last several decades, during which it’s been expanding a lot. They don’t really have any baggage with particular groups, but will notice the possibility for gains if they intervene in the current situation. There’s more flexibility here.

It’s complicated. :smiley: The two main councils are the Assembly of Families and the Assembly of Communities. The Assembly of Families contains a patriarch or matriarch (more often the former) from each officially recognized family, or often a surrogate chosen by the patriarch/matriarch. That’s family in the sense of very broad lineages, more like clans. Many families in Laghuna aren’t recognized at all. Many more are in the MC’s situation, where their family is recognized, but the representative is a distant urban relation who doesn’t really “represent” them at all. That said, it is still the less wealth-dominated of the assemblies, because at least the dominant families get no more than one representative each. The Assembly of Communities includes representatives from each “community,” which range from vast countryside provinces to the neighborhoods of the capital. These representatives are elected by their local governments. They’re effectively quite gerrymandered and dominated by the urban minority (which is exacerbated by the fact that urban areas tend to dominate local governments as well). Although Laghuna has a majority of the republic’s population, they form a minority bloc in the assembly. (Some of the outskirts of Laghuna aren’t incorporated into communities at all.) There are also centrally appointed governors across Laghuna. Corruption and vote-buying are quite common, and there are equivalents of pocket boroughs; many local governments are also in the pockets of the rich.

The two assemblies elect the seven lords and ladies who are the highest in the government. They are quite elite and almost always belong to the same families. (If we’re talking gender, there’s four posts typically held by men and three typically held by women, but with some variation.)

Once old enough, the MC would be able to participate in the village council. Theoretically, the village council is represented in the local community’s assembly, but the wealthy family that owns the nearby fortress is effectively in charge.

A peasant will have a harder time winning respect in the republic than with the rebels, but these are desperate times, and it will be possible. [/details]

I can think it over. I feel the word “random” sounds more 21st century than I want, but if the phrasing’s confusing I’ll consider possibilities.


#20

Hmmm, hmm…that beges the question are the rebels for a reformed republic that actually represents the majority of its citizens, or are they necessarily supporters of a (renewed) monarchy. Are there multiple rebel groups, and if not can we influence the monarchist versus republican leanings of the main rebellion at all?

Ack, so we’ll be a fashion disaster and/or the mc will have no sense of fashion at all. :sweat:

Awww…I like big sis, my mc is more likely to be “rivals” with his big brother, whose hand-me-downs he’s likely to get.

Between 14-16, which means practically an adult woman, given the time period equivalent you’re alluding this game takes place in. So I guess we’ll see her get married soon-ish then?