The One Chosen (WiP; on hiatus)

This is the tone I figured @ParrotWatcher was going for, to be fair. The trauma never felt that deep to me and mostly reminded me of “evil stepmother” stories or, to use an obvious example, Harry’s time at the Dursleys. I wouldn’t pick… any vice like smoking or drinking for an MC but I’d definitely see the story differently :thinking:

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Both are there and there aren’t compatible you can’t do a tale of revenge and abuse and a cheerful light game. Game in my honest opinion seem could go either way. As testers our job is help birdie choose what he wants.

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Since we’re still on it, if you decide to allow drinking and smoking would you consider adding an option to be chocolate addicted, @ParrotWatcher? No pressure, or sarcasm with the whole situation, I’m really just asking :yum:

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Let’s just say I wouldn’t have reacted as meekly as Harry to the abuse the Dursleys loved to dish out.
From what I’ve heard from one of my friends a lot of fanfic seems to agree with that position.

On the other hand in the Disney version the worst evil stepmothers often do is steal your inheritance, treat you like a servant and try to keep you from going to the ball…the mc here is treated far worse than that and more on par with some of the original Grimm versions, those are stories for adults…not little kids and most often not meant to be particularly light or cheerful either.
Fairytales used to be for adults for a reason after all.

And the beauty is in the combination of the two, a gritty mature story about (the consequences of) abuse, poverty, insecurity, desire and eventually ambition set in a seemingly cheerful fantasy universe with magic and rainbows and likely some unicorns too. :wink:
That is, imho what makes this story distinctive from other offerings, like Waywalkers for example.

As for more darkness in this game the mc, under the assumption that we’re their prophesized saviour is already possibly ruthlessly mind-raped in the prologue, which goes a step beyond the attempted mind-rape in the new and, imho, still worse opening of Keeper. :unamused: Can you imagine what they’re going to do to the mc once they find out we’re actually powerless. :fearful:

Isn’t the Hunger Games still rated “young adult” stuff too? And that certainly contains an almost excessive list of various social and political ills and mature themes. :thinking:

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The mixture is as i said my favourite choice. But if has mature content is a Mature game with other rating and other audience.

Sincerely. I think this game has potential to create A game similar deep as Fallen Hero but with a sarcastic humorous and cheerful universe Pratchett style.

But that means adding stuff that a young adult game doesn’t contain and attract other public .

Made a more mature game will let adding more about politics society and info about abuse a way young adult all public won’t

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Thanks for all the replies. :sweat_smile: I guess I’m going to keep the game as it is, at least for now. :slight_smile:

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My main question would have been how the MC could afford to have a vice. They can’t even get a sandwich.

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Smokes and liquor are apparently quite easy to acquire even with little to no money, atleast here in U.S.

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I mean… maybe? I don’t drink or smoke personally but my grandmother used to. There might be cheap booze but cigarettes are expensive because they get taxed big time. It’s kind of a moot point anyway because the MC doesn’t have money even for the cheap stuff. That means the MC would either have to beg them off strangers who would be reluctant to give it to a kid or the MC would beg for money which would be better spent on food. I suppose stealing is an option but that stuff is usually kept tucked away.

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I love the premise and the setting, “fun” and “bright” are the two terms I’d use to describe it. There is something about it that feels optimistic and, for lack of a better word, magical. The world also feels very open without losing the characters to it.

If I’m allowed to bring up your previous work, I feel like there has been a growth in terms of writing; particularly with character voice. The dialogue doesn’t feel as question/answer, but more like an actual conversation. The characters we have seen also feel more like characters and not just character archetypes–which I ultimately attributed to the difference in style and setting. Totem Force was a fun story to read/play and I feel as if this project will provide just as much, if not more, fun for readers.

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The very short answer is the same way all the other homeless people do.

Cigarettes are very easy to steal, most likely from some of the foster parents before Birton and in general would be no more difficult to nick than sandwiches once the mc has run away and easy to obtain booze is even more omnipresent.

But how will my mc have coped with all the shit then? I’m not much interested in roleplaying a disorder other than general misanthropy and maybe PTSD this time around? :worried:

Nope, it’s as easy to steal as anything else in the supermarket, particularly the booze. Once you cross the threshold of being willing and able to steal it is as relatively easy to acquire as any other non unique goods.

As one of the other poster’s has said:

My mc isn’t just going to “get over it”, particularly since the mc doesn’t have any actual power(s) and everything will get much worse again soon anyway and a kiddie vice really wouldn’t cut it as a believable coping mechanism either.

Huh, I really didn’t get that. Behind the bright and cheerful facade the world seems rotten to the core to me.
In addition to the abuse in the non-magical world our possible first introduction to the magical world is being ruthlessly mind-raped by Eddy’s sibling and they do this while still under the impression the mc is way more important to them than we actually are. Once we’re less than nothing again, imagine what sort of shit they’ll casually do to the mc then. :fearful:

I’d say Waywalkers is the bright and sunny magical school story where we have no reason not to be a well-adjusted mc here, Keeper is somewhere in the middle, with a large degree of possible mc and motive variation, with its world being as grey as the real world is for most people and this one is about as dark and edgy as they come, imho.

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Unless MC wants to start off smoking cigarette butts they found near a drain, it won’t be a very easy vice to keep up with when cigarettes and tobacco are kept right behind the clerk. A lot of homeless people beg for money or just straight up ask for a smoke. Supermarkets would be especially hard if you look scruffy because the guard will almost inevitably follow you around.

Alcohol is another matter, sometimes it’s behind the clerk, sometimes it isn’t :man_shrugging: But unless MC is a preteen burglar and organizes regular heists on corner shops they won’t be having a grand time. Stealing from their foster parents just makes my skin crawl since the younger the smoker (ten), the more uncomfortable I get.

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They’re often still in a machine too. Those are easily vandalized and often are and always get replaced in a matter of days, good as new. If you ask me those are an unofficial service from the government and the tobacco companies to the homeless and the desperate.

Except for the hippies it’s clear the various “upstanding” foster parents that got foisted on the mc didn’t give a rats ass about the mc, so we clearly think differently there. Mine wouldn’t have a problem stealing from any of them, except maybe the hippies.

I’d say volunteer a day at your local legal aid society then, that ought to bust you right out of your comfort zone as you’ll be liable to see a lot of kids age ten or younger with drinking, smoking or worse maladaptive coping habits.

Many places will only have CCTV and reporting a minor for well…minor thefts is often hardly worth it. Particularly if, as noted, the mc keeps moving around the country and doesn’t repeat offend at any location within a year or so.
As for cops and security guards this is arguably one of the things where there would be a real difference between unaccompanied, dirty-looking minor boys and girls. But in general most people would ignore a dirty-looking young boy.

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I can confirm that sniff paint and glue and even heroine is not so hard to find in kids i volunteered in red cross in college filling legal forms and stuff for people. And what you see in kids is messed up.

Neglecting foster parent have a tendency to give depression pills valium lithium to kids to make them shut up and many weed to abuse them. In spain last month found a baby with heroin in blood because father wnted he shut up.

However in a game if doesn’t go for mature and wants be cheerful young adult. These type of content is not accepted by any company or ratings standards.

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Ok stealing them is rather easy as far as I’m aware most gas station keep thier liquor in frodges for people to take, and while smokes are usually behind the cashier you can always ask for them and make a run. Regardless as long as we get something to show what we went through whether it’s a vice or a mental disorder I’m fine with it 'cause there is no way the mc can just come out of that unscathed.
As for what kind of content the wip can be seen as, this is not a cheerful story with a set background like this, at best it’s dark and gritty masquerading as cheerful.

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I don’t think mature is better and helps someone growth in writing. Deeper? Yea. Mature? No. The difference is just the theme.

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I’m late to this particular feedback loop but here are my thoughts for whatever they are worth:

With this project, I am getting an X-men vibe (or more specifically, the spin-off tv show set in the x-men universe which I can’t recall the name of at this moment) from this. Unlike Totem Force, this vibe is more “connected” to the harshness aspects of reality, and so I feel it would be appropriate.

Also, smoking gives our MC an excuse to carry matches or lighters and for the arsonists out there, this ties into your origins story if you need it to.

Smoking and drinking are also the “lesser” evils as others such as @poison_mara have pointed out that you normally encounter in this world, so they also provide one more tie into reality that would aid your world-building.

One thing that you may or may not have considered is adding a “challenge” to these activities, such as addiction that you can use later in your development and writing. Sort of how ZE:SH has challenges, you can add balancing consequences to counter the “cool” factor involved.

Edit:

This is not the case for the American rating system, so I’d actually leave the WiP here. Now, once you start adding sex, rock aand roll and abortion into the mix, that is a different matter :wink:

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Here alcohol and smoke is normal in minors however with virtual stuff in apple a Google play have been very adamant t9 including alcoholism and drugs abuse in +16 however abortion is perfectly +12.

I personally agree with you adding more mature down to earth gritty magic world and contrasting it with an apparent cheerful exterior could be spot on. And serve to differentiate the game from others same style in hosted.

A more mature tone goes well with not being a power fantasy and not being the chosen one. We need do something to not returning to shit. That’s the game vibes i get that and revenge

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You can add sex at 16 or over, at least in our system and you might get away with implying it, if used for drama, at any age…but obviously that would fall into the definitely not lesser evil category. Although as long as you do it in a Special Victims Unit kind of way where nothing is actually shown it’ll go on daytime television no problem.

Exactly my impression and there’s also a whole trope for it.

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Minor update; no extra scenes, but I added a little stuff to what was already there.

I’ll let you headcanon it (for now); as I said, I’ll think about if it makes sense to add in later. :thinking:

This shouldn’t be all doom and gloom… :sweat_smile: I hope… :sweat:

No sex or abortion… :thinking: Wait, Ædmund has a guitar! :scream:

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