The Devils Privilege [WIP] (CHAP 1 and 2 out now) 46k words (excl. code) UPDATED 7/5/24

I’m sorry to hear that. However, in the long run, there will be other characters and romance options in the story, or you can choose to skip the romantic elements entirely. I do want to point out that romance is meant to be a big part of the story though. Hope you have a good day!

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Nah. The author has warned the readers beforehand about the content and the character’s… well, characterisation. And is MC not supposed to be confused? Like, MC just found out supernaturals are real?? And even with that, the MC can still kick those monsters’ asses and is not a useless damsel in distress. Besides, these ROs are demons, personification of everything bad, them being condescending and contemptuous is a given :tipping_hand_woman:
Mind that it’s also only two chapters in, there are plenty of room to grow. If you don’t like the trope, that’s on you. Many people love the “Wayhaven style” trope, and in good hands it can be very entertaining to read. You’re also a writer, aren’t you? Why don’t you leave a proper constructive criticism that helps FableForge instead of complaining. You can offer advise on how to make the characters more likable and how to handle the confused/ignorant MC better, what’s so hard with that?

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it’s only 2 chapters bro, let’s author cooked.
the stoy look promising, i’m looking forward for next chapter!
anyways idk why but feel like MC flinched a lot lol

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i’m not a fan of Wayhaven type stories either… but this is only 2 chapters. there’s not enough for me to say it will be exactly like that story, and what i’ve read so far is decent (at least MC has some agency lol). the spoiler/summary is enough for me to give the author some faith, so i’ll stay tuned for now. my only suggestion is to work on pacing, some parts sound rushed or too mechanical? the balance between hitting plot points while having a good flowing narrative can be tricky, but doable!

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Hey, thanks a lot for taking the time to give your constructive criticism. Would you mind giving me an example regarding the pacing so I can work on it? Thank you :blush:

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Interesting stuff and it has potential but 2 chapters isn’t enough to say much beyond that.

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I really like the story, the demons are very suspicious and almost unlikeable but it’s understandable at the same time. It’s the first and second chapter so we aren’t as close to our RO’s. How many chapters will your story have? Do you want to make it into one or more books? I’m looking forward to read more :grinning:

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Wow this is really well written. Would never have guessed English was your second language