this seriously means a lot to me!
i’m really excited (and a little evil) about where the story’s heading next, so thank you for taking the time to read and leave such kind words. it really does keep me going
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Horror, you say? 
Click me
KILL IT WITH FIRE!!!
Either you dropped a bit of the sentence or just the final period. Unless you did it intentionally, for cogitus interruptus, which is a very valid thing to do, especially in the genre, but I just want to make sure you MEANT to do it.
You “/”'d after instead of before.
Again, not sure if it’s on purpose (in the genre, it’s hard to tell) so I’m pointing it out. If you leave the the breakfast table “before it remembers how to stop you” you get this screen, with text suggesting you’re going outside:
But then the next screen is this which feels like there’s a different scene bleeding in, which, again, I’m not sure if it’s on purpose or if the text is wrongly drawn from a different scene:
Misplaced “/”.
Ok, a couple more screens and I get to here, where I’m getting up fro the breakfast table. But I ALREADY got up and never sat back down (or at least you didn’t say), which makes me think there really is something looping in the game code re.: at least the first exiting the room.
Rogue code.
Vincent get identified as “Vincent” before he introduces himself as Vincent.
So, the first breakfast time around there were no people other than me and pink cardigan creature. And now there are? Is this Stilwater trying to fuck with my mind, or was there a bit on the first breakfast I was supposed to see but somehow skipped?
They do? How do I know this? My name doesn’t show on the note.
Wait. I do? Is it night again already?
Ok, I was presuming Orla was who wrote the note, but apparently not seeing as she doesn’t know my name and the note writer did (I still don’t know how I know they know).
This page has three “]”.
This one has two.
Man, this scene looks like it was pulled straight from the creatures from From. 
]
This is creepy. I approve. The second-time descriptions being JUST lightly off, like you gave an AI image generator the same prompt in two different occasions, are great.
Just one additional thing. One of the first posts talks about choosing appearance and how it shows up on the stats menu, but I don’t recall any appearance customisation and also, uhhhh:
This thing is going to have a hell of a time tracking me if it doesn’t know what I look like. 
I’m now EXTRA-convinced there’s some early game choice that sent me down the wrong path, possibly me leaving breakfast.
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thank you so much for taking the time to write all this out. i really appreciate the detailed feedback. that kind of thing is incredibly helpful, and i’ll be going through everything you pointed out to make sure I catch all the little gremlins.
that said… i am absolutely mortified about the rogue code. the true villains here are bbcode formatting, my fat fingers, and quicktest for letting me believe everything was fine when it absolutely was not 
also, i want to apologize if the earlier posts gave the wrong impression. the appearance customization isn’t super elaborate or layered like in some other games. it’s more about flavor and tone than deep stat impact (for now), but if it’s not showing up properly in the stats menu, that’s definitely an issue and I’ll get that fixed asap.
it means a lot that you took the time, and it genuinely helps me make this project stronger. i’m very much still learning as I go — and sometimes the code does fight back — but i’m grateful to have thoughtful readers helping me catch what slips through.
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I think the only customisation I got was the name. Can you tell me WHAT I should’ve gone through, just so I can make sure I did or didn’t?
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that is… very strange indeed.
let me show you what i have in my text file:
*label appearance_select
Your reflection doesn’t come all at once.
First, the outline. Then the color. Then the feeling. And finally—memory.
What you looked like, or what you needed to look like.
Choose what you remember.
*choice
#Tousled hair, tired eyes, a hoodie too big for you. A woven friendship bracelet hangs from your wrist, faded by time.
*set appearance_vibe “soft”
*goto mirror_reacts
#Buzzed hair, a jawline like a warning, black ink swirling up your throat in old tribal patterns. You stare yourself down.
*set appearance_vibe “sharp”
*goto mirror_reacts
#White-blond hair, skin too pale, eyes like old glass. A heavy, beaded necklace you don’t remember putting on.
*set appearance_vibe “eerie”
*goto mirror_reacts
#Brown hair, worn jeans, a plain T-shirt. A leather cord necklace, simple and familiar.
*set appearance_vibe “plain”
*goto mirror_reacts
#Messy curls, chipped black nail polish, a silver ring on every finger. You smell faintly of smoke and cardamom.
*set appearance_vibe “eerie”
*goto mirror_reacts
#Neatly combed hair, pressed collared shirt, a tiny gold pendant at your throat engraved with a name you can’t remember.
*set appearance_vibe “soft”
*goto mirror_reacts
#Dark undercut, leather jacket scuffed at the elbows, denim patched with band flags. A tattoo in your mother’s handwriting curls over your ribs.
*set appearance_vibe “sharp”
*goto mirror_reacts
#Short, coiled hair, old scars down one arm, a heavy sweatshirt pulled low like armor. An old woven anklet peeks from your jeans.
*set appearance_vibe “plain”
*goto mirror_reacts
#Long, braided hair tied with red thread. A vintage jacket lined with rabbit fur. A cigarette dangles lazy from your fingers, smoke curling like prayers.
*set appearance_vibe “eerie”
*goto mirror_reacts
#A shaved head, a crisp white kurta, and dark henna patterns faded across your knuckles.
*set appearance_vibe “soft”
*goto mirror_reacts
#Tight locs pulled into a bun, heavy boots, dark cargo pants. A long-healed piercing at your brow.
*set appearance_vibe “sharp”
*goto mirror_reacts
#Shoulder-length black hair, long sleeves despite the heat, and a beaded bracelet strung with bone and wood.
*set appearance_vibe “eerie”
*goto mirror_reacts
#Loose, frizzy hair, soft cotton hoodie, jeans stained at the knees. A bright woven bag slung carelessly at your side.
*set appearance_vibe “plain”
*goto mirror_reacts
i’ll run a random test to make sure everything is going accordingly???
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OH MY GOD I FIGURED IT OUT!
that’s fully my bad. i put the wrong directory for those that manually typed their chosen name. so wrong, in fact, that it made you fully skip the appearance selection process. i’m gonna bash my head against a wall, be right back.
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Yeah, I remember none of those things.
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Me when I miss a singular code and now my game won’t playing normally because I accidentally put one more space bar than the other
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This is why I always have whitespace symbols on in my text editors.
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i don’t know why i never thought of that. it’s… so smart?
Sometimes, I dread ever making an IF, exactly because of the nightmares involved in coding.
That aside, this was really good! It has the sort of prose that sticks to you, and there’s a clear mastery of the language. That whole “Aftershock, Aftertaste, Aftermath” line for example, has that touch of poetry to it I can appreciate. Poetry and psychological texts can go hand in hand quite a lot, due to how meaning is warped.
I also like how everything sort of melds together not just between dream, reality, afterlife or weird fucked up magic realm - but also a possible virtual simulation of some sort.
If there’s anything I can offer, then it’s that at times it feels like everything is too fast, so I can’t quite digest the ambience of everything that is happening. But it might be part of the intended experience.
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