Hey guys, longtime lurker on the forum here. Recently I’ve been writing out some concepts for fun, and I stumbled on one I’ve liked a lot and want to turn into a full game.
*edit: Check notes on worldbuilding/lore for some small updates on approaches to game lore
Small summary
You are the only offspring of a prominent noble family in Luce Prima, when you are tested for high latent magical ability. In this world, magic is unlocked in individuals through highly traumatic or stressful events, dubbed an awakening. Due to potential conflicts in the future, high ranking officials decide to force awaken you through inflicting mental trauma. You overhear this plan ahead of time and run away, hoping to find a lead to awaken through untraditional methods. This leads you to a chase after the myth of the first mage and to the undiscovered secrets of magic itself.
What you can expect
- Character-focused story - One of my favorite things while reading is to watch different characters grow and change, so I hope I can bring that into my own story. The plot will be focused primarily on driving forward character development for both the MC and the other characters.
- Romance options - I haven’t made a final decision yet on ROs, but there will most likely be 3-4 options.
- Ability to customize your MC’s gender/orientation/appearance, etc.
- However, small note of warning. For people looking to play around with powerful magic from the beginning, this story might not be for you. One of the main conflicts of the book is you avoiding becoming a mage through traditional methods.
You can play the current demo here.
Notes on worldbuilding and lore
Currently, I feel a little conflicted about worldbuilding. I want to introduce it organically throughout the story without a big lore compendium in or out of game, but I also worry that some ideas or concepts will be unclear.
For now, I’ve settled on a bit of a compromise - I’m going to not put in any extraneous lore/worldbuilding in the demo. If there are any concepts you have question about or need clarification on, please tell me, and I’ll see if I can either implement it into the current demo organically, or give an answer on how/why it will be revealed in the future. In the case that neither can be accomplished, I’ll add a section here detailing what and how it works, but I’m hoping that I can avoid that in a lot of the cases.
*edit: I still want to be able to introduce everything organically in the game, but I will provide some of my thoughts on lore, etc. here so anybody that wants to access it in this manner may still do so. There will be spoilers in here.
Lore
Luce Prima
The city of Daybreak. Capital city of the country with the same name. Ruled by the Senate, a group of influential nobles that set laws, handle diplomatic relations, and manage finances. Most of the country is set in fertile lands with mild climates. The general population, as such, tends towards peaceful self-isolation, with a focus on literary and academic progress.
Noctem
The city of Nightfall. Capital city of the country with the same name. Ruled by the First, a king selected every eight years based on a combination of martial prowess and general popularity. Most of the country is set in harsher lands with more extreme climates. The general population, as such, tends to be more physically fit and developments trend towards military advancements.
Senate
The seven most influential noble houses in Luce Prima. House Desroches, House Mendacium, … (haven’t quite decided on the other ones yet).
Major Arcana
Generals of Noctem. Twelve in total, ranked in order: The Fool, The Magician, The High Priestess, The Empress, The Emperor, The Hierophant, The Lovers, The Chariot, Fortitude, The Hermit, The Wheel, Justice, The Hanged Man. (yeah, before anyone asks, inspired by the tarot cards.)
Characters
There are currently only 3 RO’s planned out, but the final version may contain more as the story evolves. All 3 are gender-flippable.
ROs:
Nikolas/Nicole Caelum
Pale skin, toffee-colored hair (cut short or in a braid depending on gender), blue eyes.
A close friend of yours from childhood who is now a Mage Commissioner in Lesrien. Friendly, sunny, and a constant jokester, they are the first person you contact after running away. Currently heading the Mage Council’s investigation into following Zorah’s whereabouts.
Ezra/Esther Baek
Olive skin, dark-brown hair (ponytail), hazel eyes.
Eighth of the Major Arcana, Mage General of Noctem. Proud, ambitious, and a little flirtatious, they are the ones that provide the lead on the Zorah investigation. Notorious for being incredibly powerful as a mage and a highly intelligent field commander.
Arlen/Arlene Nett
Naturally tanned skin, curly black hair, black eyes.
Librarian of the Mage Council. Gentle, caring, and soft-spoken, they are enlisted for help in the investigation by N. Has a small addiction to sweets.
All current and future ROs will be mages - this is important to the plot/character development of each one, and practically non-negotiable.
Non-ROs:
Adrian Desroches
Your father, Marshal General of Luce Prima. Duty-driven and rational, famed as the cornerstone of Luce Prima’s military strength. Currently unmarried, first wife died years ago from unknown reasons.
Edgar Mendacium
Head of the Luce Prima Senate. Cunning with a ruthless streak to perceived enemies, he has a hand in most major events in Luce Prima. Has control of the Luce Prima spy network.
Zorah
Said to be the first mage to exist, hundreds of years ago. Rumored to have eternal life (not to be confused with immortality). Many modern-day myths and legends are based on her life.
Currently being worked on
- Adjusting pacing for demo → adding moments that can provide extra characterization or insight
- Taking another look at how certain characters interact → trying to make reactions seem more natural
- Adding some more interactions in chapter 1 (heard you about the bard
) and fixing some pronoun errors (I hate coding pronouns, send help pls) 
Feedback I'm looking for
- General writing style (i.e. am I being too flowery, too plain, not enough dialogue, etc.)
- Lack of or unimpactful decisions (i.e. you felt like your character should be able to make a choice here, but that doesn’t happen in the current demo)
-
Or just simply drop by and tell me if you liked or disliked the work
! Any and all feedback helps!
Update Log
26 February 2021
- Added in chapter 2
18 February 2021
- Fleshed out some of the prologue and chapter 1
- Added a rough outline of the second part of the prologue to better introduce MC
- Fixed some bugs and various issues brought up from day 1
17 February 2021
- First draft of prologue + chapter 1 uploaded
- Fixed some initial feedback
In this update you can: - Overhear a conversation between your father and the Senate Head
- Watch a spellbinding performance
- Meet up with an old friend
- Get introduced to a new “enemy”?
My friend helped me set up a tumblr! You can come ask me questions here!
It’s cool if you don’t feel like that would work well, though.
) if you could point out maybe one or two instance where you think it worked, so I could try to either model the rest of them to follow it or simply cut them out and put them into the text itself.
. But I’ll definitely look to get them incorporated in soon, and hope you enjoy where the story keeps going!
right back at you 
) with lore and RO/character details that I’ve planned out.
.
