I just had to rewrite the prison scene and most of it was mainly shifting scenes about 
The word count of the revised Chapter One is 23,244 words.
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I had a good time playing this.
Some minor issues I ran across…
Summary
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In the prison as a female robin, I was able to choose Arthur for the other prisoner but the resulting choices indicate Arthur is a girl with “Ask what she’s in for.”
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Meeting the warden you can ask him “Ask about my Arthur Ravenwood” instead of father in this instance.
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When talking to the Viking, he asks how you ended up in jail but MC doesn’t answer, it skips over it and he simply says “I see”.
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When the friar helps you escape with the short guard (will?) it doesn’t introduce the guard but the next page has him named. Choices: save salah → “The Saracen slave is alive?” Will asks.
Friar Tuck is my favorite person. I keep imagining him as that fat badger guy from the Disney version where Robin is a fox. 
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Disney’s Robin Hood is the best Robin Hood!
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When first in prison at the “s/he offers you a hand” choice I get an error "chapter-one line 1559: Non-existent variable ‘prison_he’ " I am unable to continue at all from there.
Sorry I’d forgot to update the startup.txt. It should work now
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Thanks!
Hey! I really enjoyed this game but I did notice a reoccurring issue in the Acolyte path. A few times I kept getting references to being a noble, like when meeting Luke and explaining why you’re there. It happens a few more times throughout. Still fun though, good story!
Odd. I’ll double check the *gotos thanks for letting me know.
I’ve checked my code and that shouldn’t happen. Other than when meeting Luke can you please tell me another one I can check.
Just rewrote the opening part of the town and would like some thoughts on how this reads.
Entering the town scene
You leave the caravan and walk past the stone fox and head back into Little Tree. As you walk around the town, you notice how despite trying to portray their happiness, the people walk about with their heads slightly lowered. Their chats, seemingly carefree, are softly spoken, with everyone carefully considering the meaning of their words.
You clench your fists subconsciously, the town is bogged down by an underlying fear of stepping out of line. This atmosphere is caused by the Sheriff’s hold on Nottingham and all the little towns within it. It is terrible but it simply sharpens your resolve.
Looking at this excerpt with fresh eyes:
Summary
I like that it outlines the tension your Robin sees in the people of the town, giving you more motivation to become The Robin Hood.
For minor improvement I would say that there is a lot of the word “walk” in the first paragraph, which makes it sound stilted.
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Just saw your response! Sorry for being a few days late. Started a new save and didnt notice any issues time around! It was in a few of the character interactions (like meeting Salah) but i think you fixed them all cuz i didnt see em this time around.
My Opinion
I agree with zozopuff that the word walk is used too close together too often. The first sentence in the second paragraph also feels like it could be two seperate ones. Maybe use a semicolon or just seperate them?
I do really like your word choices though. “Bogged down by underlying fear” and “it simply sharpens your resolve” really bring tension to the scene. It feels like its gearing up to something important!
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@zozopuff @PanicAtTheEverywhere
I’ve come up with two different rewrites. Which version do you prefer?
rewritten scene
You leave the caravan, heading past the stone fox, and back into Little Tree. As you explore the town, you can’t help but notice how, despite trying to portray their happiness, the people walk about with their heads slightly lowered. Their chats, seemingly carefree, are softly spoken, with everyone giving careful consideration of the meaning of their words.
You clench your fists subconsciously. The town is bogged down by an underlying fear of the Sheriff and his hold on Nottingham and all the little towns within it. It is terrible but it simply sharpens your resolve.
Alternate version
Leaving the caravan, you head past the stone fox, and back into Little Tree. The town is bogged down by an underlying fear of the Sheriff and his hold on Nottingham and all the small towns within it. Walking through the town, it is hard not to notice that despite everyone trying to project a visage of happiness, the majority of the common folk went about their business with their heads slightly bowed. Even their conversations, seemingly carefree, are softly spoken. People carefully consider how their words could be interpreted.
Your fists clench subconsciously, it is a terrible feeling, but it only sharpens your resolve.
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I like the rewritten version better!
my thoughts
If I had to nitpick I could say the flow of the second paragraph in the rewritten version could be made better by combining the sentences of “The town is bogged down by an underlying fear of stepping out of line.” and “This atmosphere is caused by the Sheriff’s hold on Nottingham and all the little towns within it.” Maybe “The town is bogged down by an underlying fear of the Sheriff and his hold on Nottingham and all the towns within it.” (mostly because it is implied in the first paragraph that the townsfolk don’t want to step out of line and that’s why they’re talking softly and cautiously.) 
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I’ve combined the two sentences like in your suggestion I think it works better 
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I’ve had another crack and I think I’ve come up with something better.
Attempt Four
With your business with the merchant dealt with, you head out of the caravan, past the stone fox and back into Little Tree. The town is bogged down by an underlying fear of the Sheriff and his iron-clad grip on Nottingham and all the little towns within it. As you explore the town, it is hard not to notice that despite the outward appearance of happiness, the common folk go about their business with their heads bowed.
Conversations, seemingly carefree, carry an undertone of caution; words have weight here, and the wrong person hearing the wrong thing could be fatal. Subconsciously, you clench your fists—it is a terrible feeling but it only sharpens your resolve.
Game Update: 14/03/2025
Chapter Two is done, written and uploaded to the public demo. Just follow the arrow.
Enjoy.
Author Note: I still have 16 days left in March, so I’ll more than likely go back and add a few more scenes. However, the main threads of Chapter Two are complete.
EDIT: As I’ve still got 16 days before the deadline I set myself for chapter two I do intend to looking into adding some more scenes to both two chapters. So if there is a moment you wish you could do something, or a scene you’ll like to see, let me know and I’ll look into it
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Reading this again! Will I ever play as anything but a yeoman starter? Who knows~ 
I had fun! Glad to see Salah again though – he’s my favorite. I would be interested in Noble Robin having the chance to speak to Lady Elizabeth (I think that was her name) in the market before any other Robin.
Some things I noticed
In the stats page I think you need an extra line of space between what you’re carrying and “You’re on the talent and equipment page”
I’m not sure, but is there supposed to be a page break here in the prison – leaving Harold’s cell → helping the friar?
In the prison you can choose the 3 things to do on the weekend (if I remember right), but you can choose options you’ve already been through to see the same scene again and again. I chose “… a prisoner tried to hurt you” all three times for the same scene.
I was hoping that learning the layout while doing laundry would give me some flavor text about being useful during the prison break. 
CH 2
I thought our mother killed/cut down when they took the farm? (yeoman background)
A little inconsistency note: when donating silver is says you need 5 silver for Friar Tuck’s order in the market, but at the market Catherine has the audacity to charge me 7 silver! (idk if it’s actually 7 silver in the code tho)
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Essentially being Friar Tuck’s adopted child is such a neat origin for a Robin Hood, I love it.
There’s a bug where as an acolyte, you give the noble version of why you’re in prison when you talk to your cellmate and it continues like that the entire prison sequence, even when you meet Friar Tuck again
Also there’s a bunch of mispelling like in prison scene where you ask your cellmate what they are in for, it’s written ‘Ask what is in for.’ instead of ‘Ask they are in for’ or when seeing the priory being burned, it says ‘toy plead.’ instead of ‘you plead’.
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Minor spoiler Friar Tuck expects it to cost 5 silver but what Catherine charges you depends on when you go to the market, if you go first she only charges you 3 silver go later and she charges you 7 silver.
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The audacity! 
Maybe there could be a cue somewhere about prices changing? Like thinking about beating the crowds for the best prices etc? For those of us who donate too much coin! (Actually is there a consequence to donating too much and then not having enough for the supplies? 
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