Try clearing your cache?
All the main companion level NPCs have a loyalty stat that will increase or decrease with your actions.
My question is do you want this to be visible or would you prefer it hidden?
My initial thoughts was to keep that stat hidden as normally you can’t see exactly how loyal someone is, you can only guess and judge by their actions. But what does everyone else think?
No reason you can’t just have it as an option in the stats screen, in other words, both
I wouldn’t mind a “read by action” here. If it were a hidden stat, it could showcase the personalities, and tendencies of the companions. People are complex; complying with a request, or still joking around all friendly isn’t the same as loyalty. Thinking things are fine when they aren’t is a pretty common issue among humans, especially when they frequently choose silence, over expressing their internal conflicts.
If you feel like you’re up for a good exploration of these aspects of individualism–even if it doesn’t go all that deep necessarily–then leaving it as a hidden stat could be a neat way to read this. I also like the ‘optional toggle’ idea if enough people aren’t fans of this being hidden. I don’t know that it would impact all that much from here, outside of scenes/flavor text maybe going ways that rarely surprise us, but both is a good compromise.
Just noticed the money still isn’t working correctly. The conversion works now, but when you go to the market it still behaves as if you haven’t exchanged any of the silver coins for bronze. I had 50 bronze coins that it ignored and made me pay with a silver instead.
Okay, thanks for letting me know. I’ll look into it some more.
The issue with the coins is that it only works up to increments of tens, and not hundreds.
You can have 100 bronze in your purse at the market, for instance, but it won’t act like you do, instead breaking a silver to put 50 additional bronze in pocket while subtracting 1 silver.
When I convert the original 3 silver into 300 bronze, I could only donate up to 99 at once because it doesn’t recognize anything past double digits.
This makes it rather difficult to donate in a quick lump sum to the poor of Nottingham. Doable with effort, but I don’t know if we have a hidden stat that tracks what we donate.
I think that’s because I have
*Input_number 1 99
I’ll increase it to a much higher number maybe 9999 as I don’t think you’ll be able to acquire that during the game.
There is a hidden variable which tracks what you give.
Either way I’ll have another look later when I get a chance.
Thanks for sharing your demo, I had a lot of fun playing it The premise is super interesting, with multiple story threads from the very start and a wide
arrow array of distinct characters.
I also like that many choices are here regarding when to perform a few actions, like who to talk to first or where in town to go. It’s like being given a very large cookie with different flavors and deciding what to sample first, all in bite-sized chunks that are easily digestible yet still give off a good amount of flavor.
The world feels large, like a chessboard with a lot of moving pieces. There are quite a few names to keep track of but for me it was manageable so far, especially because the names keep popping up in different characters dialogue, so it helps seeing who’s who and get the dynamics going on.
I’m definitely curious regarding the type of customization for Robin. I think the idea of Ways you’re using is great (I picked Wolf), it gives a nice flair and it’s consistent with the setting, what with the base camp being in the woods. I like that this aspect of the character is presented as a way of being / a general approach rather than a set of individual stats.
Pacing-wise the beginning of the story is really fast, which can work well for actions scenes, but I found myself confused at a few points (see specific feedback below). More detailed descriptions could help set the stage. Things quieted down in town, and I appreciated the slower rhythm then.
More specific feedback
Those are the notes I took during my playthrough. For context, I played a no-kill, noble background Robin who attacked the guards ahead of the carriage in the first scene (left then right guard)
-
For the symbols option right before the game starts, I didn’t know if they would work on my device before I clicked so having the example before the choice would be helpful. Thankfully everything worked fine on my end, no weird empty squares popping up.
-
Just a thought - since the first flashback was short, and the transition back to present was really quick (the “CAW” on the button leading to the next page), it could help if the flashback was written in the past tense instead of present like real time events. This is just an idea to differentiate between timelines. I’m also mentioning this because I did spot some inconsistencies in present / past voice in multiple parts. Here’s an example I found later in the demo: “You empty your pouch onto the merchant’s table and he smiles as he picked up the ring first and his eye-glass so he can study it in more detail.”
-
Unless he’s a particularly nice guy, I would have expected the second guard’s reaction when realizing his buddy was shot with an arrow would be to look around for the archer, not to try and remove the arrow (which is not a great idea in the first place), but panic might explain his attitude. It also works if he hasn’t been a guard for very long, or if the training provided by the Sheriff is light. This might be a me thing but it surprised me when I was reading
-
I wasn’t sure how many guards there were ahead of the carriage in the first fight scene. The description said two, but my Robin had to deal with seemingly three (there were three sets of choices to kill/incapacitate the guards): when Robin goes down from the tree, I chose to knock a first injured guard out, then it says I’m going after the other injured twos who are crawling away. Also just to cite a specific example, there’s a sentence that goes “The guard hits the ground hard, much to the amusement of his fellow horseman, his companion even climbing from his horse for a closer look.” that also made me wonder if there were two or three guards (are the fellow horseman and the companion the same person?). The first two choices for where to aim the second arrow also made me wonder whose leg or back I could aim for - I deduced it was the second, uninjured guard because of the third option, but it wasn’t immediately clear to me. I think it could help if there was a detail to differentiate the guards - maybe one has a crooked nose, or a broken shoulder plate, or a yellow satchel attached to his belt (again, just suggestions). And around the end of the fight, just after Little John is introduced, a fourth guard is referenced (Robin technically dealt with five): “As you walk past the carriage, another guard rushes you.” - where did this guard come from? Was he part of the group behind the carriage? I understand there’s a lot of variation in this scene, with real options on how to tackle the fight (which I really appreciate, by the way) but the scene was a little fuzzy to me.
-
In prison too, I got a little confused about a few things. Overall it really looked like prisoners had a surprisingly high degree of agency. The setting was not super clear to me - I got it was a prison but that’s about it, and I didn’t understand Robin had a cellmate until I clicked on the Saracen slave option. Then the scene with the friar - they knocked out guards and then talked about escaping, but what were Robin and the friar doing out of their cells in the first place? Is there a moment when the prisoners go outside then are escorted back? There wasn’t much details around prison life before the choice hub, so it was a bit difficult to picture what life in prison actually looked like for Robin. More descriptions could help, also for pacing - I’d guess a stay in prison might feel pretty long, but the pace is quick.
-
When escaping the prison, I chose to take no other person with Robin, the friar and Will, but then Nell commented on Will’s outfit (“I think it fits just right,” Nell whispers.). I don’t think this line is supposed to be there. Then later at the pub, she thanks Robin for freeing her… which Robin didn’t do
-
Tiny detail but I got asked twice where Robin wears their quiver (in the forest at the start and at camp)
-
When traveling to town with the merchant I got the line ““My name is Much," Much answers politely. “And this is my companion, Robin.”” while I had picked Little John as a traveling companion
-
In town, it’s the merchant who asks how much money to give to the poor - so the merchant / fence knows what Robin does? This made me wonder, how secret is the whole operation? Also I’m not clear on the currency used in-game, so I don’t know, say, how much bread three silvers can buy. So I chose to give a random amount of money. Small suggestion, maybe presenting this choice like “how much of what you took are you giving back” and then presenting options like give a quarter / half / all of the money you made could simplify the math
-
This is not feedback at all but I misread Friar Tuck as Triar F*ck one time and now I can’t unsee it
-
This is also not really feedback but you really like the line “I’ve got an arrow with his name on it” don’t you? It came back at least six times in the options and in text ^^
Typos
-
“Let’s go grab our earnings,” Little John says with a smile. Robin, would you care to do the honours?" — Missing quotation mark before Robin
-
her messy red hair fell passed her shoulders — past her shoulders?
-
“Listen, Robin,” she says. If you don’t put them in their place, they’ll get stupid ideas like Alfred’s here. — missing quotation mark before If
-
Pulled by two majestic white horses whose doors were etched with the sigil of a fox. — I’m assuming the doors are etched with a symbol but this reads slightly like the horses are, which… please no? ^^
-
However, considering Sir Stewart has taken to taken me double what he charges other merchants. — I didn’t understand this sentence
That’s it for me! I hope this can help. There is a lot of potential here so I’m curious to see where you take your story! Good luck with the writing
That’s only part of the problem. I didn’t have 100 bronze in my purse because I’d already given 50 bronze to the poor. So the other 50, which should have been spent, wasn’t and instead it broke up my silver coin. So there’s something that’s still not tracking bronze coins correctly.
Thanks for the feedback.
I’ve not got much time to type a complete response, but I will mention that the merchant does know about what Robin does.
In my version of the tale. Robin sells the things they take from their jobs to the merchant who gives them money and then arranges with Robin how much they would like to distribute to the poor.
I was intending to go into the process a bit deeper in chapter two but I’ll look into adding it to chapter one. But the basic thread for how it works is as follows…
- Robin steals a chest (from either a carriage or during a break in).
- Robin keeps any coin and sells any valuables to the merchant (a particular merchant with ties to the black market)
- the merchant sells the stolen goods to his clients and then keeps the proceeds minus what Robin requests to go to the poor.
- the merchant “donates” that money to the priory.
- that donation then is distributed among the poor either via coins or supplies etc
Ah, that makes sense! Thanks for the reply!
The interaction with the merchant made me curious regarding who knows what, is all. The exchange really read like this is something normal between these characters, so if they’ve functioned that way for a while then that transpires really well - it’s all “business as usual”
Been a while since I was so hyped up for a game (Robin Hood is my favorite mythos character). The IF is already good from the start, and I love how it gives you so many choices. Chapter 1 is already 5/5
Yes. At the point you attack that carriage Robin has been with the Merry Men for two years. So
I got a little more into it today! Here are a few thoughts based on what I read.
thots
Two years ago, your father, Robert,
(Robert Hood)
“Now, who is that behind you?” the nobleman asks, failing to hide the disdain in his voice completely.
“I HATE children”
Does the player character know who Sir Guy is at this point? I was given the option to refer to him by name here.
I get the feeling the crow cawing is a signal from the band and not an actual crow, but I don’t think this is confirmed.
The dead man collapses at your feet, allowing you to wipe the bloodied sword on his uniform. With both guards unconscious,
There are a few points at which the game loses track of who’s dead and who’s not.
Some of the dialogue option choices involve another character speaking instead (“I was leaving him for you,” John replies with a shrug). Choosing an action for somebody else feels a little odd - are these situations in which Robin is staying quiet to give others a chance to speak? Is there a broader Merry Men customization happening here?
You spent the past couple of days shadowing Harold
I killed a guy! But why?
Ruling the prison by fighting the strongest inmate is a normal trope, but I don’t know if that includes knife assassination.
Plus, this is just after my nobleman Robin was arrested. Do I really know how to track and murder a guy yet?
I’m getting a little disoriented by the shifts from past to present. “Escaping the prison” and “looting the carriage” blended together in my mind a little.
Having the option to talk to everyone in camp is a little overwhelming.
Plus, if I can choose my starting reputation with all the characters, why wouldn’t I pick the maximum amount with each one?
Maybe there should be limiters on these. For example, only having time to talk to 3 people. You’d miss out on content, but that’d add some extra customization and replayability. It depends on what sort of game you want.
Hanging around in town is a good time. The orphanage is nice. But I hope I’m not prepping these kids to be knife murderers! The stories I’m telling here seem to be E for Everyone.
The coin denominations are a bit clunky in general. It might be a radical suggestion, but you might use a single number to record money, just so the player doesn’t have to manage each individual penny.
If not, it would help to add a count of your current money on each “how many silver will you give?” screen.
And here are a couple typos I noticed.
typoes
Jealously raged behind them.
“Jealousy”
“I won’t let you, Robin, run!”
“I won’t let you. Robin, run!”
The curved knife sticking from his back reveal what had happened to him.
“reveals”
As soon as you can see his back, you make your move You swiped a knife on the way,
Needs a period
“A pleasure doing busy with you,”
“business”
You’ve got a bunch of interesting systems set up here. If you can get them to work together as a unified package, this could be a great adventure!
oriadne’s feedback up above is a good reference. A lot of her observations are aspects that stood out to me as well.
If it’s the choice I’m thinking of your mother should have referred to him by name at that point.
Oh, you’re right! It was in the text of the previous choice. Sorry about that, carry on.
It’s all good. Thanks for all the feedback!
I’m simplifying the money system to just Silver Coins. (Gold will just be involved but it will be classed with trinkets (5), keepsakes (10) and heirlooms (15) which you will be able to sell for Silver coins. Gold will be worth (20)).
I believe this will make it easier to track. I am just at the point where you have to buy the goods for Friar Tuck (and have now added a mention of needing the Silver just before the choice to donate. - you can still choose to donate all your Silver if you want.)
A question I’ve got now is its currently set (in my version) the goods required should set you back 5 Silver (the amount given when it is brought up.) However, I am considering having that price change depending on when you go to the market (i.e if you go first thing you get a discount but if you go last they try and charge you more.) (Blurring it in case someone doesn’t want this to be spoiled)
I actually understood that reference and that was a great panto!
Yeah. Robin really wants to put an arrow in Sir Guy
There are the two horsemen travelling at the front, two travelling behind and One in the carriage. I’ll look into the code some more and try and make it clearer.
Yeah, it’s like a way for the player to choose not to say something but still allow someone to react. At the moment, it doesn’t affect the Merry Men.
Initially, when I wrote the scene, there were options to do it lethally and non-lethally, but it had a few coding issues, so I cut the choice and just had that play out; I’ll look into adding the option back to it. Or at least signpost the initial choice as a “kill someone” choice.
Don’t worry, you aren’t, only teaching them to pick locks
EDIT: I’ve uploaded what I’ve adjusted so far. I am working on the two horsemen scene so for now that bit skips straight to the companions so you don’t hit an error and can still get to the end of the demo and test that the updated Silver coin system works better than the old one.
Edit 2: the horsemen scene is back and rewritten and recoded in places. As well as an additional scene in the prison with the cellmate who can know be male or female depending on your own gender (need to decide what to do about non-binary Robins).