I know already whom my MC will aim for first. That aristocrat sounds interesting, the others do too of course, but I guess I have a thing for romance between people of different social classes (maybe a bit unhealthy?).
A flamboyant aristo? Well, I already know who I’m going for.
Loved the teaser , I think it’s great that there’s so many choices in such a short span and that you can begin to figure out the characters’ personalities so early on. Looking forward to seeing more.
I’ve submitted Chapters 3 & 4, which is super cool! I want to celebrate with releasing THE WHOLE OF CHAPTER 1 - link at top!
Meet 3 of the 4 love interests, stake a claim in the Arena compound’s living space, and try to survive the sociopath gang leader who’s found a reason to be offended by you…
Remi is supposed to be female for me
Also what does Remi look like? The only physical description we get of them is that they have pale eyes.
I CANNOT decide who I want to romance. I feel like my current character has the best chemistry with Eryx…
Thanks for spotting that! I imagine there will be a fair number of those to fix
Do you have a physical description of male and female Remi, not sure what they look like besides the pale eyes it mentions?
I do not know if it is too late reconsidering attributes that you give certain weapons, but I do believe (based on history) that these two weapons should be reversed.
Currently, you have:
The crossbow was historically more powerful, although not as fast … both would be equally well aimed.
I would think about switching the “carefull strikes” and the “powerful strikes”.
Crossbow is basically the poorman’s shooty stick in the sense it’s designed primarily for the ease of use. Bow is not easy to use, and pulling its string to effective power requires… power. It’s the equivalent of weightlifting and stacking jenga pieces all at once while a raging madman charges at you with his club raised high. Crossbow eliminate all these for the cost of reload time.
Of course, a trained archer (10+ years exp.) can shoot fast and land powerful, well-aimed shots regardless.
Personally, I’d put crossbow as easy-to-use powerful weapon where the cost of using it is not tied to stats, though you can load anti-armor bolt on it. Bow will be the hard-to-master variant, but when your character passed that threshold, maybe you unlock some badass scene (IDK. Catching a flying arrow mid-air and shot them back at your opponent?)
Oh, while at it, spear pls
I found what I assume is a typo when you choose your physical description: the first choice is “Broad and heavily broad”.
Edit: also, when first talking to Aztore, one of the responses is “Prove myself how?” but she never said prove yourself, I don’t think?
@c67f I caught that typo straight after posting thank you!
@No_This_Is_Patrick there are more detailed descriptions in chapter 2, which I will post at some point in the future! But in edits I may well go through and put more detail into the descriptions in chapter 1 too.
I’m super interested in the discussions about bow Vs crossbow. Even as I was writing it I knew the stats weren’t quite right, so that will be something I’ll tweak!
I’ll definitely be looking to strike a balance between crunchiness of combat and it being, at heart, a romance game. There’s lots of good choices within combat but I’m wary of making it a fighting simulator, if that makes sense!
I haven’t written much while the world has been as it is - working from home with our 4-year-old is very different to stealing writing breaks at the canteen at work. But it’s really nice to read over people’s responses and remind myself of the fun!
Continuity error: Remi takes a step back, the fight bleeding from her broad shoulders. He scrubs a hand down his angular, stubbled jaw, pale face turned away. “It’s not compliance, it’s being realistic.”
Great spot, thank you!
How’s the development going? Everything good
Enjoyed the demo. Look forward to seeing more!
Things are… going! They are happening.
Chapter 5 is finished and edited!
I work in education management in the UK.
I am very busy with the day job at the moment and it is Sub Optimal for writing, but we’ll get there in the end.
Chapter 6 is where you can ‘lock in’ romances for most of the love interests so I’m looking forward to writing some emotionally satisfying mush!
We are very proud of you.
Working through a crisis in confidence is a hard thing to do sometimes.
Congratulations on reaching the “done with chapter 5 milestone”! Onward to romance-lock-in! I’m rooting for you.
Thank you both! I won’t let this defeat me
I just found this and it was really good. I hope you continue this project as I am looking forward to more.