I have no idea what the previous demo was like, but I can say it does feel rushed. Everything happens a bit too quickly for my liking? I, personally, would have liked there to be a build up for Imri (as others have mentioned). We can still see them at home for the first time, but interaction is sparse at best. If you call to them, they can glance at you just when Emilia arrives. Conversation goes on, but Imri is already gone. Then you see Imri again perhaps while clubbing, watching a movie, or going for drinks. I would go as far as to say I’d like it if Imri was presented in a friendlier light before BAM, they turn antagonistic.
I hope this doesn’t sound rude, and I suspect this is due to the demo feeling rushed, but the chemistry between the ROs (mainly Em, Gabe, and Leander) feels off. I’m guessing Em and Leander knew Gabe already and while his personality and antics can easily drive someone mad, I dunno, I guess I just find it hard to imagine this group being MC’s gaggle of buddies (assuming that’s the intention Every MC must have The Squad).
Other than that, I enjoyed the demo and I hope I haven’t come across a certain type of way, as that isn’t my intention! The TLDR of this is: I would like this more if it was paced a bit slower. I know, it’s hard to get the pacing right. I’m often looking at my own writing and just asking myself: “Could I take this scene out? What if I add this in? Is it too soon for this to happen?”