One way of looking at that could be that your choice of preference is made multiple times. As long as you make it consistently, the story shouldn’t tell you anything inconsistent with your character (I think!), whatever it may ask you.
But of course, you’re free to decide that’s not how you want to read it. In which case, I can only agree that I’ve written a rebellion which is a pretty bad dating service.
It doesn’t mean that you have to stop asking for ROs that match your preference. And your defensive reaction doesn’t mean you’re homophobic.
But it’s neither ridiculous nor bull for vampierkid to riff on your comment by pointing out that in game after game, gay and lesbian players have to put up with, “the only romance for an LGBT person is a brat who you are forced to like [if they’re so lucky] or a heterosexual romance?”
The best response probably would have been, “Yes! I feel for them too. And Havenstone, as long as you’re writing genderflipping characters, why the hell haven’t you written them so that all of us can have a shot at Kalt and Suzane? (Cause the non-bi gay and lesbian MCs are also out of luck there).”