I like to think that Fake!MC is just Q in disguise
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Holy Jesus I just finished and wow!!! Jesus itās so good, lots of lil spelling and. Grammar mistakes, all easily fixable stuff. But totally what Iād imagine a more realistic super hero type story to go. The ending insane and really got me hooked and wanting more!!! Definitely canāt wait to see how this story ends .
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omg dude this is sooo insaneeee! and here I thought I would never find such āunique superhero plot IFā (well thatās aside from the ones Iāve already played, but hey itās a good oneāa better one even) but setting my personal opinion aside(I mean Iāll talk about it later)
Iād like to site some teeny weeny suggestion and comments for this game (note: the following is a mere suggestion only, and is not demanded, it is solely up to you if youāll give at go, sooo no pressure at all
-
The MCās power - I really have no personal issue about the power sets of the MC , I just thought that maybe itās also good that you add some power optionsālike a certain element(like water, fire, earth, metal, air, lighting, iceāsomething like that) that the MC could wield or hone in the coming chapters, something thatāll add authenticity to the playerās MC (an MC that they can call their very own because they had the choiceādonāt you think?
) -
Grammars - although itās not totally noticeable, itāll be good to recheck that (but donāt fret Iām not telling you do it now, I know youāre doing your best hereāand youāre certainly doing a great job!) but I just had to say youāre quite good with words
I was so much entertained while playing the game, like seriously thereās no boring part about it -
Characters- lemme just say this first, is there any possible way that I can punch Forlorn like in a row for fun?āI mean damn the guyās got an attitude, but 'nyways moving on, I actually got no suggestions for the charactersātheyāre all perfect the way they areāeven Gloriaās a good egg tooāI love how real the characters seem to be, they had their flaws which make 'em all very realistic (coz seriously I could bet that thereās a lot of āForlornā like peeps out there that needs smacking
). Overall you need not to change these very lit characters trulyātheyāre all lovableāeven the domineering egotistical Forlorn. -
The Plot- there are a lot of things I could say about the plot itās Superb, Fantastic, Amazing, Extra Ordinaireāor whatever you may call it as an embodiment of Awesomeness
real Sugoiii neeeāseriously it is indeed a very interesting IF thereās no doubt that Iāll be very eager to see whatās left in the box, especially if itās already this good even if itās still on going soooo Iām totally gonna hang around and see where youāll bring me next!
Also Iād like to just confess how this game had me speechlessālike look at me typing this comment now when Iāve finished playing it yesterday. Thatās why Iād like to thank youuu for leaving me so speechless (only a few could do that) Keep it up okii? Iāll be rooting for you or more like we will be rooting for youuuu! Coz look at this bunch of players all eager to see what you got for them for the next chapters. 
Anndd that would be allāoh wow I totally laid my personal opinion thereāhehe but what can I say it hit me hard, right in the heart 
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Hey, hello! Apologies for taking a bit to answer, but welcome to the thread! And thank you for all your compliments, I really appreciate the support ^-^ Itās always great to hear that people are discovering and enjoying the story, as barebones as it might be.
Iām happy the cast has made an impression, even those who have only been there for a very short while (like Gloria, Iām very happy heās made a big splash as heās the one I was most worried about when writing). As for your power suggestion, it just so happens that I already have plans for a character that essentially has elemental manipulation, so the MC couldnāt quite get that one. Still though, the playerās powers are quite unique, and not very similar to anything most people have seen before, so donāt worry just yet.
The MC is quite the special cookie, for both good and ill. 
Happy to hear youāre sticking around, by the way! Always great to see new additions to the group, youāre all pretty kickass.
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Hello! I hope youāve all been doing well. First things first, Iā¦ donāt have an update for you. Yet. Iām still working on it, I knocked out about 5k or so words from Sunday to today, so it should be out sooner rather than later, but ironically, the fighting part of the superhero story is harder to write than the romances. Would you believe me if I said I was worried about the opposite?
That said, because I know youāve all been rather patient, I have a few snippets to show you all. Theyāre mostly short one-liners, but they cover stuff from the whole chapter, give or take. Itās purposefully made to be not in order, though, so donāt think you can figure out the beats of the chapter by using them:
Likewise, while working on the main meat, Iāve also done some side stuff. I donāt mean regarding the blog or anything, itās actual codex stuff, like what @idonotlikeusernames suggested. I showed some of it on Tumblr, specifically the ācivilianā profiles for Mars and Gloria, but thereās also just general information that I think would be relevant to the player. It will be unlocked as the chapters go along, but so far, I have four entries. They are:
Mars
Powers: Enhanced senses of sight and hearing, Thermoreception, Hyper-Awareness.
Real Name: Matthew Williams
Age: 24
Profession: Personal Bodyguard.
Matthew is a perplexing existence. Heās a powered person who works for someone that, at least on the outside, seems to detest powered people. He stands silently like a statue behind a man that seems poised to spout vitriol wherever he goes.
Some wonder why thatās the case. While itās obvious why Stratton cannot get rid of him now - Matthewās powers make him the perfect bodyguard, able to react to any attack while itās still miles away - itās not obvious why Matthew does not take his leave of the man. Itās mostly rumors, nothing concrete, but nevertheless reported that heās made friends with some members of the League of Heroes. He could very possibly find a home among them, if he so wanted, and itās a question why he has not chosen to do so.
Some have made their conclusions on the matter. On one aisle, we have those who think Matthewās service to Stratton is proof that he agrees with the sentiments shared by the President. āHe who serves a bigot is no less a bigotā, they argue. The highly politicizing situation across the country doesnāt lend itself to disprove this position, either. Strattonās actions, not only regarding those who are powered, but also regarding other minorities, has not endeared him to them. Matthew may not be a symbol of their movement, but those on this side of this argument see him as a supporting pillar, at the very least.
On the other side, we have those who consider him an exemplar. No matter the attempts to squash it, rumors abound that the relationship between charge and bodyguard isā¦ tense, to say the least. It may be behind closed doors, but thereās a fair chance that Mr. Williams is subject to the same idiocy Stratton directs at the rest of his kind. The fact that he does his duty in spite of it is something worth respect, they claim. Matthew knows where his skills are most needed, and he puts them to use no matter what.
The truth of the matter isā¦
Not known, actually. Mars, as he is known to the media at large, doesnāt entertain the line of questioning. Really, he seems almost dedicated to not talking about his personal life, and his lack of direct spotlight means nothing has been found. The only thing heās shared is that he comes from a working-class family.
As for the rest of his secrets, wellā¦ Theyāre his to keep, it seems.
Marcus Gloria.
Powers: None.
Age: 34.
Profession: US Army Officer (2007-2015), Vice President (2016-2020), Acting President (2020-)
āWith Gloria to Glory.ā
Much can be said about the man standing in the podium next to Stratton. That he is a man of proven courage and skill is first. That heās earned the trust of many with his charming words and rousing speeches is another.
That heās landed in a position he never should have is the latest of them.
Born in 1986, whatever was expected of Marcus by his parents could not come close to what he became. Enlisting as a soldier at the young age of 18, Gloria graduated from West Point with honors, and first cut his teeth battling Taliban fighters in Afghanistan. There, he obtained several recognitions for valor and going above and beyond. The papers took to calling him āThe Compleat Soldierā because of it, once they found out yet another hero was fighting for America off its shores.
Yet thatās the beginning of Gloriaās story, not its ending. Coming back to the mainland in late 2015, Gloria sought to run for the House of Representatives in his home state, hoping to do whatās best for his people, he claimed. His popularity before throwing himself to the streets proved a bit too big a boon, however. Gloria was a hero of the nation, and it so happened that his campaign ended up eclipsing even that of candidates to far bigger offices. It became so big that some surveys around the country found that if he so wanted, he could have gone not for the House, but for the Senate, and perhaps even become a contender for the White House, had his age not made him a most non-traditional candidate.
But Stratton cared little for tradition. He sought an assurance, a checkmating piece that would turn his eventual victory into something not possible, but assured. |
And Gloria could do nothing but comply. He joined hands with the man, and went on to do a smashing campaign. Some claim that Gloria handed Stratton the White House. Others claim that all of Strattonās acts as President can be blamed on the young soldier, for he is the reason Stratton is President at all.
Othersā¦ see him differently. While Stratton may be proof of the worst the system has to offer, Gloria stands opposite as the best there can be. His personal acts are faultless, at least. Traveling to Europe, heās met with heads of state of the whole region, reassuring the world of the unity between the Old and New Worlds. Heās pushed a couple of initiatives to rework several flawed, but well-meaning systems put in place by administrations before his.
But now, that which so many used as an argument against him has come to pass. Marcus Gloria stands as the Acting President of the United States, and he has taken his seat at the most unstable of times. With Washington having been attacked, the threat of a King that once made his glory savaging an Empire, and having to rebuild the trust in the US that Stratton has spent the past 4 years ruining, the same thought rattles around in the brains of the whole world.
What, exactly, is Marcus Gloria made of?
Giga City.
Founded: 1665.
Population: 10,126,482.
Demonym: Gigan.
Whoever tells you they do not know the City of Giants is lying to you. Be it in America proper, or in the farthest corners of Asia, Giga City has made the papers, both for good and bad reasons.
Originally the site of the Dutch colony of New Amsterdam, the region came under control of the British Crown in 1664 after a short period of armed conflict took place between the Dutch and the British. The British won the battle, but it cost them the life of the Duke of York.
Since then, and for the next 130 years, the region came under control of the Colony of Connecticut, before its growth (thanks mostly to its natural harbor and its strategic location for British and, eventually, American troops) led to it splitting off and becoming part of the newly created Giga State in 1794.
Ever since, Giga has been at the forefront of America. Abolishing slavery in 1801, repeatedly breaking the British blockade during the War of 1812, being the birthplace of people like Teddy Roosevelt or FDR, and, in the modern era, becoming home to the League of Heroes, the first ever coalition of powered beings working under the United Statesā government.
An economic powerhouse since its founding, Giga City remains one of the most important and rich places in the USA. In it, we can find the headquarters of the United Nations, the internationally famous Lady of Liberty, the Empire State, and a dozen other monuments to the splendor of the city.
Of course, thatās not to say all is good. While the glory of Giga serves as a mark of pride for the Americans, it represents something entirely different to others. The United States is no stranger to the acts those with power do to those without, and there are plenty of people who may see the city as a mockery, the shining star of an empire that marches on, no matter who, or how many, it has to crush.
The Cretan Republic
Founded: 961 (Kingdom of Crete), 1019 (The Pacific Republic of Crete), 1734 (Cretan Republic).
Population: 5,242,641.
Demonym: Cretan or Cretean.
Government: Unitary Presidential Republic.
Originally founded as the āKingdom of Creteā in 961, hot off the heels of the āBattle for Chandaxā, the small island of Crete is a nation that has evaded the eye of many, and for believable reasons. Unlike the mighty empires who surrounded it for much of its history, Crete had no time for ruinous war. Sticking to a stance of total neutrality, the lands of the ancient Minoans has focused itself on that which moves the world. Slowly at times, rapidly at others, but forever consistently, the Cretans have cared for little more than trade, and making money off of it.
And it has worked. Despite being 1/66th the size of France, and over three hundred times smaller than India, the Cretan Republicās economic might matches both. The refusal to get entangled in foreign debacles without need has led to a state that earns far too much money, and has nowhere to spend it but its own lands.
But Creteās neutrality does not translate to weakness. Crete maintains armed forces that, while not as numerous as those of more populous states, are just as, if not more so, powerful. Aside from the United Kingdom, it is the only nation in Europe to command more than one aircraft carrier, for example, and its land forces account for more missiles than it knows what to do with. Creteās military expenditures are also extremely large. For a GDP of 2.9 trillion, the portion of it that they dedicate to the so called āCretan Defense Forcesā makes the Cretan military the third best-funded one in the whole planet.
Yet the myth of Cretan neutrality is shattering, however slightly. Starting with their declaration of war on the Axis in the aftermath of Operation Mercury, Crete has begun to take some tentative steps towards foreign matters. After the end of the Second World War, the belief was that Crete would once more return to its island and close its doors to petitioners, and while it would appear they were right at first, it is not quite the truth. British rumors of Cretan military advisers to Egypt during the Suez Crisis were common, and the fact that the Cretans intervened in the fallout of the Six-Days War is undeniable.
Still, unlike most of the world, Crete beats its own drums. It will spurn the Americans, the Russians, and the Chinese all in the same breath. It does not seem to bend, or in fact even be subject, to much international pressure. And while it is true that Crete shares positive relations with the United States - they would have never obtained their air forceās F-35s otherwise - it seems that the Cretan populace sees the US as nothing more than a trade partner, instead of the hegemon of the West so many others treat it as.
And, of course, the resurgence of the Broken Kingās myth brings even more questions to the foreā¦
Itās not direct story stuff (well, yet, at least. I guarantee some of it will come up soon enough), but I wanted to hear more or less what you thought of them. Do they give you the information that you expected? Is it enough to garner your interest?
Did they leave you with any questions? If so, which ones?
Were you expecting them to talk about something else? If so, what is it? Iāll try to add it, as long as it within reason.
Putting even that aside, thereās something else I wanted to get your thoughts on. Namely, start of chapter quotes. I notice a few other games use them, and personally Iām a sucker for them, so Iād like to introduce them to AToH. Some of them would be specific lines said in the chapter itself, while others would just be character quotes that are related to what the chapter tackles. I donāt want to make the opening pages too cluttered, so Iām a bit hesitant on signing off on them, but I worked on a few and Iād thought to see what you thought about them. If you like them, perfectamundo, Iāll try to see how to add them without overloading the pages, but if you donāt, please, feel free to let me know.
Either way, check under the cut for some of them:
funny words
āI am, more than anything else, a man of the people.ā - Cretan President Minas, June 30th, seconds before officially declaring war on the whole of the Axis.
āThe way the world treats powered people is fundamentally flawed. We bend over and give away all that they desire, throwing away billions to keep a scant few supposedly āloyalā to us, only to be shocked when the remainder acts out on their base impulses. Weāre like a child, really, that puts his hand over a flame, only to cry out when it inevitably burns him.ā - Professor Julia Adams, Treatise on the Deal of the Powered.
āI told Adolf to stay out of that cursed island.ā - Prime Minister Mussolini, being informed of the Cretan Navy sinking the Aquila.
āBabble no further, o old general of the East. Silently accept that your name shall be etched into history as the vanquished.ā - Attributed to the Queen of Crete during the Battle for Chandax, 961.
āWe survived the Byzantines, we survived the Ottomans, and we killed an empire meant to last a thousand years in a mere four. Crete desires nothing but peace in the world, but Allah have mercy upon he who thinks that Crete will not hit back once struck.ā - Cretan Foreign Minister.
āThereā¦ There is more to life than this, my son. It was my job to show you that. But I suppose it is not only at war that I failed at.ā - Secret.
āThe King is a starving, beaten beast, with nothing to chew on but the chains that keep him tame. Now, only one of them remains. And when it breaksā¦ā - Secret.
āSoā¦ Whose princess am I?ā - Secret.
āFor what itās worthā¦ I think Iād like her.ā - Secret.
āYouāre a fool. Youāve spent so long alone that you refuse to be anything but.ā - Secret.
Also I wanted to make fun of the Nazis so have two more:
ā'Tis nothing but dumb courage that propels him. How kind of the fool to save us the time of having to chase him down.ā - Erwin Rommel, on being informed of Seekerās attempt to break the German lines at El Alaimen, 1942.
āHmph. So whether it be brains or brawn, I am no match. Truly, a monster.ā - Erwin Rommel, last words. Two hours after the above.
Lastly, because I have asked quite a bit of you, thereās a certain enigmatic figure in this story that you wonāt meet yet. Heās powerful, and everyone seems oh so determined to find himā¦
They have no idea where he is, though.
But they found his diary:
Thank you for reading this rambling mess of a post! Next up, and hopefully soonā¦ Chapter 5.
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Absolutely loved this!
Also if your gut says you should do the quotes. Then do 'em. Do what you feels best for you not us. We just here for āyouā & āyour storyā. 
Anyways looking forward to the future update.
And yeah I totally believe you on the writing fight scenes. Got make sure that stuff flows and doesnāt skip or get mixed up somewhere, otherwise we get ourselves a dream scene one moment you fighting Doctor Who the next you showering. How did the scene change so quickly! lol.
That a side do take your time. If we waited this long, we can definitely wait a while longer.
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Hey, great to hear from you. Hope everything is going well. Now gimme more Aki. 
A little note: āIt is the only nation besides the United Kingdom in Europeā should be āthe only nation in Europe besides the United Kingdomā, otherwise āin Europeā is locating the United Kingdom and not qualifying āonly nationā.
This is the first positive thing Iāve heard about Stratton, ever.
This is me. Iām Others. You donāt get to empower someone and then wash your hands clean of their doings.
I still donāt like or trust Gloria, and that slogan just makes things worse.
For a similar reason, I still donāt like Mars.
It me. Iām They.
āJust doing my jobā got Nazis to dance the rope fandango at Nuremberg, and I find it no less of a self-condemnating excuse now than it was then.
On the journal, avoiding spoilers:
Nice move, having the King call the Americas āthe Eastā.
I genuinely like the King. He seems like a good chap. Hope it doesnāt have to come to blows in the end.
EDIT: On that first line, fuck you, Forlorn. Iām a āhimā or a āthemā, not a āthatā. Just because Iām dating Aki doesnāt give you the right to treat me like an object.
ā¦
Aki can objectify me, though, if she wants. 
gets murdered twice over by Forlorn
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Now Iām wondering where the United Kingdoms that arenāt in Europe are located.
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Sinn Feinn won the elections in Northern Ireland and Scottish independent sentiment is growing, so there might not be a United Kingdom in Europe for all that long, either.
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Awwā¦but Mars is a young, cute and charming gentleman and it is most often that type or the bad boy I tend to fall for in fiction.
Besides, unlike Gloria, Mars already risked his cute ass to help us out. Even if you want to see Mars as guilty by association that at least could be the beginning of redemption.
Also thinking of maybe making a campaign trail fan game for this version of the US in the far future when we know much more. Maxwell/Maia vs either Gloria or Stratton.
My own mc was hardly enthusiastic at first either. Superhero is not an easy to contemplate profession after all when you either never had the skills or affinity for it for most of your life, like my mc, or a set of skills that lends itself more to some other profession, even if they are super powers, like Mars.
Mars will come around too Iām sure of it.
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If it helps, I outright ask him about joining the League. 
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Thatāll get me. Fixed!
Funny thing is that the statement is a technicality, anyway. What Crete has are two amphibious assault ships, but being American and all, theyāreā¦ bigger than most traditional carriers in other countries.
ā¦ Do you think they may be compensating for something?
Oh, come now, you donāt trust a man declaring that heāll bring you to glory? Iām sure he has perfectly attainable goals, nothing extreme.
ā¦I mean, itās not like his name translates to anything, and itās also not like I use so much symbolism that names are also hintsā¦
The Queen thanks you for the compliment, Iām sure. Even in death, about 90% of the Kingās actions are based on what sheād want.
ā¦Though the juryās out on what drives the remaining 10%.
Well, technicallyā¦ would the UAE count? 
The Danish Realm is also partially in America, I supposeā¦
Not to worry, I have plans for Mars to prove his mettle soon enough! Heāll get the spotlight soon, as well as a chance to explain why he works with Stratton/Gloria.
Chapter 6 will mostly be a Nova/Mars/a bit of politics centered chapter, right before Chapter 7 and 8 bring the āplotā roaring back into place.
Thatād be amazing! Chapter 5 brings up a bit of international politics into place, and shows the personalities of some of the people the US President has to work with (why, does it look like the French and the Germans donāt get along? Thatās weirdā¦), and Gloria had a certain plan he wanted to mention before being oh-so-rudely interrupted, so weāre gonna be seeing a few of his policies come up soon enough.
Game 2 is where politics will really come to the forefront, though. You have no idea.
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Not unless heās taking me to a stripclub where Glory is taking her clothes off, no.
Part of my concern is exactly that his goals might be perfectly attainable.
Pizza. He just canāt enough of that cheesy goodness.
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XD this might be one of few times we agree. But yh we do need more Aki.
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Inb4 Iām just doing you all a bait-and-switch that ends with the League joining hands with the King to depose the American President after he goes nutso.
ā¦ But I wouldnāt do that. No way. Right?
You have no idea how funny this is. Iāll keep it bookmarked specifically for when the truth comes out.
Aki will get her due soon, I promise. Thereās actually a portion of Chapter 5 where she and Forlorn have the spotlight, and boy am I excited for you all to see that. Itās not every day that things go quite like thatā¦
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Iām cool with doing this before he goes nutso, too.
Canāt wait. Itād be funny if I somehow accidentally stumbled into a plot point while making an off-hand joke.
āThe Broken King is too powerful! We canāt stop him!ā
āThere isā¦ one way. But itās a dangerous path weāll have to tread.ā
āWhat?ā
āThe Broken King isā¦ā
āWhat? What?ā
āHeāsā¦ā
āWhat?!ā
āā¦lactose intolerant!ā pulls out a pizza
loud gasp āWait. Howās that dangerous?ā
āYou wonāt BELIEVE how terrible those farts are gonna beā.
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Really liked it!
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Weāll see. Anyway what would the political parties main colours be for the map? I was thinking of going with the classical market liberal deep yellow for the Liberation Party and Purple for the Revoās?
On economics the Liberation Party seems to be closest to the Republican Party we all know and hate in that they seem to be some form of market liberal and want to protect the economic status quo in favour of those who are already well off. Culturally it is nothing like the current Republicans because this is US is just a lot more progressive culturally and even the Liberation party, as the more conservative one, seems to espouse something closer to Obamaās tech-bro neoliberalism.
As far as the colour while in most of the world red is the socialist colour and the Revoās mainstream seems to be some form of social democrats in 'Murica red is either associated with the far from socialist Republican party on current electoral maps or hardline communism/Stalinism otherwise.
I could use green, but again the Liberation party seems far from being as anti-environment as the Republican Party is in fact their focus on the wealthy may make them seem more pro environment to many current conservationists, assuming the Revoās still focus more on the much more dense cities.
Obviously brown and black are out of the colour consideration entirely for obvious reasons and my problem with blue is that while in the topsy turvy world of the US it stands for the current Democratic party in elections, where I live (deep) blue is the colour of the Conservatives.
I suppose since I like the idea, being a pinko commie myself, I could always just give in to my base instincts and use pink for the Revoās.
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Purple might not be ideal, as it is a colour thatās actually used in the real-world political map already. OTOH, we already have an (R) party, and itās the opposite party, so maybe that ship has sailed already.
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Hmmm, honestly, I was thinking the Revolutionary party would be purple, yeah. The Liberation and Revolutionary parties came about rather late in comparison, after World War 2. By that point, the national consciousness of America already associated red with āthe leftā, courtesy of the USSR, UKās Labour, etc. It also helped that a lot of immigrants from Europe came to America shortly after WW2, which meant that they had that natural āblue is conservatives, red is socialistā.
The purple would be a compromise, āthe best of the Dems mixed with the red of the future.ā
The Liberation party would likely be some sort of blue and yellow mix, honestly. They want to imply that theyāre not as bad as Republicans, but they want to give a sense of familiarity to the newer citizens, who donāt all exactlyā¦ share the love of socialism and such.
For a given definition of it, to be entirely fair. Itās true that LGBTQIA+ people are less targeted (although that goes more for homosexuals and bisexual people, as it does irl), but thereās still a lot of cracks. Itās not really obvious, but Nova seems to have somewhat of a distrust towards the police in Chapter 3, Ignis has a lot of legitimate grievances against the Liberation Party, and, of course, the American people did elect Stratton. And as you can see from Novaās depiction during the WH Correspondentās Dinner, Stratton and his aides have some, uhā¦ some thoughts on the irregular (read: non-white) immigrant.
If the MC spends much time with Latooni, theyāll likely see another aspect of it. As Iāve mentioned, sheās half-Japanese, and thereās a certain portion of America that thinks that Seeker made it so Japan got off too lightly.
Thereās a lot of victories in this version of the US, but that just means itās easier to concentrate on other ugly aspects. Americaās foreign policy isnāt really any better than irl, and thereās not really any sort of noticeable political current that denounces Americaās actions.
Natives are still just as oppressed as irl, as the Kingās diary mentions, America still got involved in plenty of regime change in South/Central America and Asia, and most of the establishment doesnāt exactly care. Gloriaās personal position can more or less be summed up with āVae victisā, and the rise of superheroes has led to a more militaristic approach in certain circles.
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