A Fistful of Dubloons - (NEW Pirate WIP) - Introductory feedback please!


#1

Avast you scurvy landlubbers… Aarrgh you going to be looking upon me new WIP or am I going to have to make you walk de plank?

http://db.tt/OXSAutie

Much Love

Captain Nine! :ar!

P.s: @Fairygodfeather - I wrote a couple of paragraphs especially with you in mind! (hope you can spot 'em)

(edit - short of time so can’t give you a long explanation about the game (sorry) so please just dive in and have fun)


#2

Why is there no soup for me? :open_mouth: Looks like you hid the code really well.

If you want me to describe your game in one word and as honest as I can, AWESOME.

  1. I see a lot of images, and great ones at that.
  2. Unlike other games, instead of focusing entirely on Piracy, there are other things as well like school.
  3. I like how you can learn the different languages, including Latin.
  4. I love the background color. I don’t know why, but when I see games with background colors, I really love them.
  5. You text is great written too and I love this style of yours.

I can go on and on but I will stop now.

PS. You said if you want to see the code, ask. Well I am asking.

EDIT: Never-mind, I found out how to see your code HAHA


#3

@BlueOwl358 Thanks blue… have fun poking around the code!


#4

Pretty good, although the uncle - Is he going to return and find out that he was trying to kill you on a ship he knew would sink, because I sure am getting that vibe.


#5

i love it especially the way one can become successful in many different way hope you add the rest of the career soon. :smiley:


#6

I love the Star Wars reference at the end. : )


#7

@nine Loving this game, do you plan to have the MC ending up as a pirate anyway or will you rise to success in any way? And also will there be any romance options?


#8

Avast ye Captain Nine! This one be not a scurvy landlubber but seasoned seadog! An’ I’ve espied a couple things… Which means ye got yerself some es’plainin’ ta’ do…

*Ahem* *Yar, Yar* *Ahem*

Item Number One on Me List:

“You breathe in the sweet smell of the ocean sea spray and crinkle your nose at the acrid smoke from the decks below.”

Ocean sea spray is annythin’ but sweet (ye’d know that if ye weren’t a scurvy landlubber! Jus’ kiddin’, anyway… ). A cake is sweet, a pastry is sweet, ‘oney is sweet, a plum is sweet, ocean spray? It’s slightly salty smellin’ , cold, and most importantly it’s fresh smellin’ too.

Item Number Two on Me List:

I feel pretty unattached to the characters, because there’s nary any screen time for ‘em. I’d like ta’ feel that either they’re me worst enemy, or they’re me closest rum buddy, or maybe they’re summat a tween the two. Speakin’ o’ characters I’d like ta’ see summore of ‘em, like Arrrgh! classmates, (see what I did there?) what are they like? An’ the sailors/ traders, any that stand out from the crowd? An’ more importantly… any of 'em have some rum?

Item Number Three on Me List:

Needs more rum.

Item Number Four on Me List:

Where be my grog?


#9

@trollhunterthethird interesting…

@djma46 @kitty9 Nope - you don’t HAVE to become a pirate… you can be a merchant… or a privateer… or be in a nation’s navy… or other *secret* professions… or you can just explore the caribbean… As for romance - yes possibly… however, I’ve yet to find a consistently good model for depicting romance in CoS games - at least the way I think it should be done. But we’ll see!

@TheWaffle I know huh? But can’t claim much credit for it… I woke up one morning and just “saw” it in my minds eye whilst lying in bed! So its not like I actually worked at getting a getting a good idea going. (PS: There is another SW reference in there too - but it sounds like you might have missed it!

@Headhunter180 Not the ocean spray I’m thinking of! As for connecting with the characters… Are you talking about the MC - or just any of the people you’ve come across already? I’ve written openings to games with lots of characterisation and get blasted for info dumping… so I’m trying to pitch this differently to start with. (BTW - what’s happening with Rise of the Pirate?)


#10

@nine No, no, see, I just mean I’d like to see more of characters, and have some more scenes concerning them at all, like I’d like to see their personalities shining thru in scenes, for example I’d like to be scolded by the priest and be able to retort (thereby this accomplishes two things, letting you give the MC a personality and giving a chance for more attatchment to a certain character). Long story short, just a few more scenes with characters (or if you could figure out a way to work new or already existing characters into existing scenes that’d work too).

P.S. (as for ROTP, see the thing is the story is soooooooooooo long (believe I said about 30 chapters in total over three games, yeah make that closer to 37 chapters) and thankfully I have most of it planned out but I have that other project on working on (A Lord Of The Riven) and I’m working on it right now actually since it’ll be shorter but just as grand on a story scale, so as soon as ALOTR is finished I’m hopping right back into ROTP. Yeah I know, torturous but it’ll be worth it, ALOTR is my warm up project to make sure I’m able to write something like what I have planned for ROTP).


#11

@headhunter180 Ah I understand… Will incorporate that into the update!


#12

i like the game so far will definently keeping tabs on this game


#13

i like this it makes my pirate side happy :ar!


#14

I like the game so far keep up the good work.


#15

@nine I will keel haul you if you do not finish this piece of art, seriously I am liking what I have seen so far. I am curious as to what @Kitty9 asked; will there be romances?


#16

and also what happened to slam dunk? :-/


#17

On the whole, I enjoyed what I played. The story started to run a little fast and a little short on detail after my character stowed away on a ship back to Denmark (a couple of sentences are all her life as a street urchin gets?), but the beginning was well done (I loved all the nationality/origin choices!), so I have faith that things will get back to that level of quality once the piracy begins.

One nitpick: My inner copy editor cringed a little at the title. The word is spelled “Doubloons.”


#18

@DJNIKOLDO @TheKing @jps175 Thanks

@Pace675 Thanks and ouch! As for romance it will depend on whether i can make it significantly add to the story… rather than have it just as a bolt on where you click click click and everyone falls in love with you. But I want to get a good pirate game first before I think about adding any romance into it.

@djma46 It is there - just on the backburner for now whilst ideas and feeback and thoughs percolate… I always have a number of different projects on the go - often they have coding subroutines that are transferable… but I find it nice to develop them in other story lines as it keeps things interesting.

@elementoflilium thanks - the balance for me is always how much extra blurb to include in a small aspect of MC creation… I could write pages for each stage and lots of people will say too long booooring… it is though only a small aspect of it - the fun comes once the caribbean starts.
( #-o idiot! Totally not nitpicking… you know when you see something for so long it just doesn’t click… *sigh* anyway it has been fixed!)

Oh and BTW…
@anyoneelsewhohaswonderfulideasandwantstocollaborateandmakeagameasitismucheasierwhenmorethanonepersonisworkingontheirownandmuchmorefuntoo!

Always looking for people wanting to pitch in and team up (Marvel or DC style - not bothered) so anyone want to work together on any of my titles please PM me :-c


#19

Great demo. I enjoyed it, though it could be fleshed out more, as the others already said.

Couple things I noticed:
“Ah yes, well we’d better see if we can get you to your uncle on San Juan then. Although I can’t say that I’ve ever heard of a Se単or Sanchez matching his description living there, but we’ll see. Come on then, Miss Sanchez,” he says, whist starting back towards the tree-line. Our small boat is on the other side of these trees."
And at the end there is an " missing before the “Our small boat…” part.

Once I wake up in the mission and have the decision whether to go to school or to the docks the first time, in the top line it says the same date I started the game out at.
Also, I’m still twelve years old even though I should have turned thirteen in the meantime as I chose a birthday in the beginning of July (there was about a month to go to the birthday and I was at least six weeks on sea).


#20

This is fantastic! I love the idea of chosing your origins and faith background, ended up playing a German Protestant boy, and it is nice to think you can decided whether you become a pirate or something else. Being English the idea of serving in his Royal Majesty’s Navy sounds fun, then I can sip my tea and deal with those blasted bloodthristy pirates in the name of King Charles (or is it William? One or the other, I know that.)